Come Together
by JennBenson
Summary: "I'm here Liv. You are not going to navigate this alone. I'm not leaving - just tell me what you need." Post Manhattan Transfer. Will Ed Tucker and Olivia Benson be able to navigate all the trials and tribulations thrown their way?
1. Chapter 1

Ed Tucker paced nervously around the living room of Olivia Benson's apartment. Of all the crazy outcomes he had come up with in his head about his relationship with Liv, this never even came close to a thought. He just kept replaying the last 2 weeks in his head, trying to figure out what he could have done differently to keep her out of this. But it was too late now. The damage, whatever it is, has been done.

 ** _Earlier in the evening_**

It took some convincing, but she finally gave in to his request to go relieve Lucy while she went to her urgent meeting at 1PP. He could already see her trying to put those damn Benson walls back up, and he was determined not to be on the outside again.

Noah, as usual, was excited to see him walk through the door. "Tuck tuck" he happily exclaimed as he toddled towards him. Ed tossed him a bit, then kissed his head.

"Mama?" Noah asked, trying to locate his mother, who usually came in right behind his new friend.

"She's still at work bud, but what do you say we hang out for a bit?" Ed asked the 2 year old, understanding his disappointment that Olivia was not in tow.

"Pan? Cookies?" Noah looked at Ed with hopeful eyes. Ed was still a relatively new figure in Noah's life, but he already had him wrapped. Whenever Ed was in charge, they either went to run in the park or they watched Peter Pan with a box of Vanilla Wafers between them.

"Absolutely, bud."

Noah had fallen asleep about halfway through the movie, but Ed let the movie finish before moving the tot to his little bed. There was something soothing about having a 2 year old asleep on your lap. And Ed Tucker needed that at the moment.

 ** _Present_**

Two hours later, and all of his calmness had left as he wore out the same path between the couch and the back hallway, waiting for his girlfriend to get home. Finally he heard the lock jiggle, and the door open. As soon as he met her eyes, he knew it was bad. The brown specs that usually glow when she looks at him weren't there and her eyes had a red tint to them, like she had been fighting tears for a while. Olivia dropped her keys and bag by the entryway table, and sighed, shifting her gaze from his eyes down to her feet.

"Thanks for staying with Noah." There was no emotion in her voice. It was strained and almost monotone.

"Liv…"

"Don't. I'm fine. I don't want to talk about it right now." Olivia pushed by Ed, making a beeline for her wine rack. She expertly opened a fresh bottle of red and reached for a stemless glass that was drying on the counter.

"You can head out. I won't be getting called in." Her voice almost cracked at the end of her statement. But she focused on swirling the wine around in her glass. Closing her eyes, Olivia took a large sip, sighing as it went down easily.

"Liv, I'm sorry." Ed was devastated. Here stood this amazing woman who had been through so much, let him in to her life so much, and now because of him she was hurting. Again.

"Don't. Just….don't." Olivia downed the rest of her wine and refilled. "It isn't your fault. Just a shitty outcome to a shitty situation. But right now, I want to be alone."

"Olivia…"

"Ed, I can't do this right now…please…" Her voice finally cracked at the end, and Ed could see a lone tear streak down her cheek.

He rounded the kitchen island and approached her slowly, removing the glass from her hand.

"You are not on your own anymore. You don't have to be strong around me. Let me help you." Ed spoke softly to her, while keeping eye contact. She finally lost control of her emotions, and let out a heart wrenching sob and tears fell like a waterfall down her cheeks. It was the most devastating sound Ed had ever heard. He immediately pulled her into his chest, one hand gripping her hair and the other circling around her waist.

"Its okay, babe. It's going to be okay. I'll fix this. Whatever it is, I'll fix it." With a sobbing Olivia Benson in his arms, he was at a loss of what his next step would be. But he vowed to himself to make this right for her. Even if it meant sacrificing his own job, though he'd never voice that her at this point.

They stayed like that for a little bit, until Olivia could compose herself slightly. She pulled back, and wiped her face with her shirt sleeve. Ed brushed her arm away, and finished drying her tears with his fingertips.

"You don't have to talk to me about it, but please let me stay with you tonight" he pleaded with her.

"Stay" she whispered to him. And he knew that was all he was getting at that point.

"Go on, check on Noah and change. I'll clean up in here and be right in."

Ed watched her move towards Noah's room, and even then he could see defeat in her walk. Damn 1PP for doing this to her, he thought as he scrubbed at the stemless glass a bit harder than necessary. He took a few more minutes to just gather his thoughts and push his anger down. He had to focus on Olivia tonight. His turn in the hot-seat would come, but right now his girlfriend was being torn apart because of his rogue family member…and he had to fix it.

He cut all the lights down, switched on the nightlight in the hallway in case Noah was up in the night, and headed to the bedroom. Olivia was still in the bathroom and he could hear the water running, so he took the opportunity to strip down to his boxers, straighten up the room, turn the lights down, and crawl in to bed so he was waiting when she finished.

It was about 20 minutes before she reappeared, looking even more exhausted than earlier. Ed gazed at her as she slowly moved around the bedroom, putting away her clothes from the day. Olivia Benson was gorgeous. Ed always knew she was gorgeous, but at night when he got to see her in her most natural state, that is when he thought she was the most beautiful. She finally made her way towards him in the bed, clad in one of his oversized grey t-shirts. Ed lifted the covers up and she slipped in, immediately curling her body into his and hiding her head in the cruz of her shoulder.

Ed gripped her tightly, kissing her temple and rubbing the full length of her back with his hand. Offering as much non-verbal security and reassurance as he could. But despite his comfort, he could still feel her shaky breaths against his body and he could sense the devastation radiating off of her.

"I'm here Liv. You are not going to navigate this alone. I'm not leaving - just tell me what you need." Ed whispered softly to her as she tried to calm herself next to him.

"I need you." She finally lifted her head to look at him, and he saw her pleading eyes, begging him to take the pain away. So Ed did the only thing he could. He rolled onto his side, pulled Olivia tightly against his body, and began to kiss her. Slowly but deeply, trying to convey every ounce of his affection and protection to her. Even though he had never voiced it, Ed Tucker loved Olivia Benson. And it was growing with every second he spent with her. So whatever she needed or asked of him, he was going to do it.

Olivia wrapped her leg around Ed's body, trying to pull him closer. Tucker got the point, and began to move his body against hers, creating a delicious friction as his lips began a trail down her neck. He gently rolled her onto her back, and settled between her legs taking that moment to gaze at her. Olivia was staring into his eyes, conveying her need to him as best she could.

"Olivia, are you sure you are up for this?" Tucker wanted to make sure she wanted this. He always checked in with her periodically during their foreplay. He knew her history, and he understood the amount of work and trust it took her to be like this with him. And he would never, as long as he lived, take that for granted.

"I need you" Olivia choked out. "Please. I need you to make me forget. I just want to feel something else. I want to feel you."

"Your wish is my command, babe."


	2. Chapter 2

Olivia was resting on top of Ed, the covers kicked off. It was her favorite place in the world, next to spending time with her son. She'd had her fair share of partners, but it was different this time. There was an added level of intimacy to their relationship. Maybe it was everything she had been through. Maybe it was the fact she was finally dating someone with a higher maturity level. Maybe it was just both of them being in the same place of life. No matter what the reason, she was grateful and safe. She could let her guard down.

"It's just temporary, Liv. You'll be back at SVU. You'll see."

"Maybe…" Her voice felt far away.

"What's going through that pretty head of yours?" Tucker asked playfully, though he could tell she was deep in thought. He peered down at her, stroking her cheek with his fingertip.

Olivia took a deep breath, and snuggled in closer to Ed. He was her security blanket these days. And tonight she needed that more than she wanted to admit. She had been reassigned and was no longer in SVU. A place she had worked at for close to 20 years. A place she called home. But as upset as she was about the entire situation, she couldn't stop thinking about her son. It confused her.

"I've given a lot to this job. To SVU. I've been the one called out of bed every night. Who has spent hours at the bedside of a victim. I've perched myself in a police car outside of homes in order to make women feel safe. And I still believe in what I do. Survivors need that warrior. But…maybe it's time to focus on other things, even temporarily." Olivia said that almost too calmly. She was sure Ed was likely thinking she had lost her mind. The Olivia Benson that existed years ago would have never uttered that statement. Granted, that Olivia Benson also wouldn't be in bed with Ed Tucker. And she didn't have a 2 year old son sleeping peacefully across the hall.

"Like what?" He decided to play along for now. At least she was talking.

"Noah. I miss so much of his day. His discoveries. His excitements and his tears. When he says new words or discovers a new bug that he befriends in the park. It's hard. Lucy is amazing and sends me videos daily, but it isn't the same." Olivia took a deep breath before she continued.

"I tell myself that he comes first, no matter what. And deep down I know that I mean that, but time and time again, the job calls. I don't want him to resent me. I want him to feel secure. And maybe, I can focus solely on him right now. Nothing else but Noah. I'm all he has in the world right now. I need to work to build him a solid life. I can't let my little boy down." Olivia's voice cracked at the end of her sentence.

"You won't. I know you won't and Noah knows you won't." Ed reassured her as he held her tighter against his body, stroking her hair. She sighed against him, still baffled at the fact that she felt so content given what had happened that day.

"How do you know?" Olivia asked before she could stop herself. She cringed at the question, because to her she felt needy. Like she needed content reassurance from her partner. But in reality she did, and just hated to ask. This was a slip up.

"Sorry, I don't know why I asked that. It's a dumb question." She said as she slowly detangled herself from Ed. But he resisted and held her to him.

"I know because you will not make my mistakes." Tucker said it with such confidence, but also a raw emotion to his voice. Olivia looked up at him, curious and surprised at the tone.

"Ed?"

He didn't speak much about his daughter. All Olivia knew was that her name was Charlotte, though Ed would refer to her as Charlie, she was in her early to mid 20s, and his ex-wife had moved south with her years ago making it hard for Ed to keep in touch. He had several pictures of her in his apartment, but none of them recent. She never had the courage to ask him about her.

"I just know what it's like to pour yourself into your job and wake up one day to find out your kid hates you." Tucker was quiet with his words. His voice was often quiet when they had their heart to hearts after being in bed together, but this was even more so. Olivia could hear the sadness in the whispers he spoke. This was the most he had ever said about his relationship with his daughter. She wanted him to keep going.

"Charlie is back in the city now, right? Working?" She asked, hoping it would force him to say more.

"Yeah." Tucker sighed. "She moved back a couple of years ago, transferred from her school in Florida to finish up her undergrad at NYU. Got a job with an agency downtown that if she stays with for a year will pay for her master's. Last I heard the job was pretty hard on her, but she's stubborn."

"Wonder where she gets that from?" Olivia said as she smirked at Ed. He looked almost proud to have instilled his stubbornness in his daughter.

"The milkman." He deadpanned back at her. God, he made her laugh.

"Why don't we have her over for dinner one night?" Olivia asked cautiously, knowing this was unchartered territory with them. Ed looked at her, clearly trying to thoughtfully come up with a response.

"I don't know. She doesn't seem to interested in having me back in her life." Olivia's heart broke at the sadness in his tone.

"Ed…"

"To her, I will always be the father who worked too many hours, never came home, and when he did would just sleep. Who knows what her mother has told her about me after all of these years. I wasn't a good dad. It's too late to fix that now." Ed rolled over onto his back, but Olivia remained on her side, with her head propped on her one hand, just observing this man in her bed. This man that she was terrified about falling in love with. This man who just kept surprising her with his tenderness and raw emotion that was hidden under his tough-cop and gruff exterior. This man who has proven to her over and over that he is worthy of her trust.

"You know…I never had a father. And I never stopped hoping, however unrealistic, that he would magically appear in my life and want to be my dad. I think it is programmed in every child to believe that their parent will come back into their life. I imagine Charlie feels the same way, deep down."

Once again, Olivia surprised herself with how open she was being. With a prayer that this wouldn't backfire and send her retreating in the morning, she allowed herself to continue.

"Only Charlie has a dad. Who is a wonderful man. Who wants to be in her life. And who I know will work to gain her trust and her heart, just like he gained mine." Olivia spoke those words while looking Ed straight in the eyes, knowing she was reaching his soul. They just held each others gaze for a while. Ed would occasionally stroke her face, but he never let his eyes leave hers, letting their conversation permeate and bring them closer as a couple.

All of a sudden, Ed threw the covers off, stood, and walked over the the window to gaze out into the Manhattan night. Liv was startled at how fast he tensed up and pulled away. But she wasn't going to let him off the hook that easily. So she rolled out of bed herself, threw on her robe, and wrapped her arms around him from behind.

"Talk to me. What just happened there?" She kissed between his shoulder blades as he reached his hands down to link with hers.

"Olivia, I'm not going to let you take the fall for this business with Eugene. I don't know what I'm going to say or do to fix this, but even if it means my career and pension, you are _not_ going down because of me." His statement came out of nowhere and it took her breath away. He said that with such finality and determination. But she could also hear the crack in his voice, and it caused a few tears to leak from her eyes. They were never overly emotional with each other, but this may have been the most they've ever disclosed to each other in such an intimate setting. There were bound to be some tears. He turned around in her arms to face her, and cupped her cheeks.

"You don't deserve this."

"No. _We_ don't deserve this. Not just me. We are in this together, and I'll be damned if I let you throw away your career before we give justice a chance to redeem the both of us. Just let this play out for now. Maybe this is giving us the time we need to focus on us. On Noah. On Charlie. On life outside of the NYPD." Olivia said, after she willed her tears away.

"Where do we begin? What does this look like?"

"Well, you start by calling Charlie tomorrow just to ask how she is doing."

"Ok. And while I'm doing that, you should let Noah introduce you to the bugs he named over by Turtle Pond." Olivia arched her eyebrow at him with her classic smirk.

"Deal" She leaned in to seal it with a kiss. But Ed clearly had other ideas as he led her back to their bed while slipping the robe off her shoulders and promptly fell on top of her.

"You are the most incredible woman I've ever known, Olivia Benson." His words went straight to her heart as she stared up at him.

"Oh, I'll show you incredible" Olivia said as she pulled his lips down to hers. They still had a long road ahead, but for now they were both content to just be together.


	3. Chapter 3

It seemed like a great idea at the time to focus on life outside of NYPD. Although Olivia was still determined to make the best of this situation, she was increasingly miserable. She was just unable to get the way it all ended out of her head. What if this was it? What if she never got back to SVU? How could it all end this way? She definitely wasn't expected a parade and confetti when she finally left SVU, but she at least thought she would do it on her own accord.

Olivia had immediately thrown herself into spending time with Noah. They went to the park, museums, the library, and even managed to catch a movie in a theatre. It had been a while since she'd gone to a movie, and she immediately texted Ed upon sitting down.

"I just spent my life savings to see a cartoon in a dark, crowded place. I'm losing it."

"Going to the movies is no longer cost effective, babe." Tucker had responded with his usual dry humor.

Now, Olivia found herself nursing a generous glass of pinot noir while Noah was out cold on the couch with Octonauts on in the background. She was waiting to hear from Ed, who had gone to meet Charlie for coffee. He was a mess of nerves when he left the apartment, constantly worried he would say the wrong thing and further damage the father/daughter relationship. Olivia tried to muster up as much compassion as she could, but eventually went with tough love.

"Ed, the worrying isn't going to help. Go to the coffee shop. Buy her a latte, ask her about her life, her job, her hobbies. See if she likes baseball and offer to buy tickets."

"But…"

"No. No buts. You're driving me insane. Go." Olivia shooed him out of the apartment, giving him a playful swat on the behind and a peck on the lips.

Olivia smiled as she thought about how natural their banter felt earlier today. Ed had been spending more nights at her apartment than he did at his own. She felt it was a sign of things to come, but definitely wasn't ready to make that commitment. Especially given both of their emotional states due to the job drama. Ed didn't seem to want to push that point either, much to Olivia's relief.

She refilled her wine glass, pouring the last of the bottle generously into the stemless ware. It was a little earlier in the day than she usually refilled, but that was because she was usually home late. Now, here all day, she needed something to keep her grounded. She promised herself this would be the last glass, then she could focus on dinner for her and Noah. That's when she heard her cell phone ding with an incoming text message.

 _Just dropped Charlie at the subway stop. Want me to pick you two up and take you to dinner?_

 _No, I'm already in lounge attire. Just come here and we will figure out what we have. How did it go?_

 _It went. I'll be there in 20._

Olivia downed the rest of her wine and rinsed the glass before putting it in the tiny dishwasher. Having a dishwasher in Manhattan was basically unheard of, so despite feeling fortunate to have one, she constantly laughed at the mini-appliance. It held about 3 forks and a spoon. She moved from the kitchen to the couch and scooped Noah up, checking to make sure he was dry. She gently cradled him and moved him to his bed to sleep more comfortably. After laying him down, she knelt next to his bed and watched him sleep.

"My baby boy. I love you so much." She kissed his forehead, then made her way back out to the living room to wait her Ed's arrival.

She didn't have to wait long. Tucker's key was turning in the lock before she even had her feet up. He barreled into the apartment, as Tucker was so talented at doing, and begin to rid himself of his shoes. Liv was constantly amazed at how noisy men could be. The simplest task of walking into an apartment would sound like a heard of elephants entered instead of one man.

"Hey, babe." Olivia drew her words out as she rose to greet him. "How did it go?"

Ed wrapped his arms tightly around her, breathing in the scent of her hair.

"I think it went okay. Had some awkward moments. But she agreed to meet me for dinner next week."

"That's great!"

"Yeah…" Ed sighed his response and still didn't let go of the hold he had on Olivia.

"What is it?" Olivia could feel the tension radiating from his body. She began to pull away in order to lead him to the sofa. But he refused to loosen his grip.

"Ed, babe, let's go sit down and you can tell me what happened with Charlie." She cooed softly to him, almost as if he were Noah. But he gave a mumbled acknowledgement and pulled her down onto the couch next to him, maintaining close contact. He stroked her cheek and leaned in to kiss her. It started out innocent, but Ed began to deepen the kiss, exploring her mouth and wrestling with her tongue.

Olivia let out a small whimper as his lips left hers, and began to make a trail down her neck. She moved her hand to lightly scratch the back of his head as he kissed and sucked at the sweet spot below her ear.

"Baby that feels so good…" Olivia cooed, knowing she was stroking his ego. "But don't you want to talk about earlier?"

"Talking is overrated." Ed grunted out as he flattened her on the couch, and continued to trail kisses down her body.

Olivia collapsed on top of Ed, both panting heavily after their lovemaking. Ed reached up to grab the throw blanket and covered up their glistening bodies.

"Wow." Olivia breathed out. "That was…just…wow. Where did that come from"

Ed and Olivia had a healthy sex life, but she was still surprised when he found new spots on her body to drive her into an even harder release. She was actually a little shocked she didn't black out during their tryst on the couch.

"It's you. I only get this way for you." Ed said softly.

"Tell me what happened today that got you so worked up." Olivia encouraged him, knowing that he only got this clingy when something was unsettled in his life. And also fully taking advantage of the fact that he always opened up more after they had sex.

"I don't even know my own kid." Tucker blurted out suddenly. "Last time I saw her she was a little girl. She giggled and had these big, curious blue eyes. Today, when she walked in, she was grown up. She was all grown up and her eyes…they seemed defeated."

"Oh, Ed…"

"I tried to make small talk at first, to take away the uncomfortable-ness. I asked her about her job, her apartment, her favorite foods. She gave such short, one-word answers. And she wouldn't look me in the eyes for the longest time. Honestly, Liv, I know I've been a shitty parent. But looking at her in front of me today, I felt gutted." He trailed off…but Olivia gave him some time, knowing he had more to say.

"She doesn't seem to talk to her mom anymore. In fact, when I asked how often she went back down south to visit, her whole body tensed up. Apparently she hasn't been back for a couple of years now. My daughter has been in New York City for 2 years, all alone, and I'm just now finding out. Because I've been that bad of a parent."

"Did she give any reason as to why she hasn't gone back down to visit? That seems pretty big. Did something happen?" Olivia asked, her intuition and detective brain immediately kicking into gear.

"It looked like she was about to spill, but then closed back up. Claimed she just wasn't happy at the university and decided to transfer up to NYU. Fresh start - better resources for her major. But there's more to it than that. I just know there is."

Olivia sat up and pulled her yoga pants back up, knowing that Noah would awaken any moment now. Ed followed suit and then they settled back down on the couch, this time facing each other. Olivia held Ed's hands in hers as they continued to talk.

"Did she give any hints? Surely the Captain skills began to emerge?" Olivia asked with a smile, hoping to bring a little levity to the conversation. It worked. He smirked. God, she loved that smirk.

"I can't interrogate my daughter on our first coffee outing." He said with a slight chuckle. Though, Olivia knew his brain was churning with questions only a detective would have.

"Tell me about your daughter, Ed. What did you learn about her?" Olivia pressed on. She wanted to get to know this mystery girl as much as Ed did. He was so kind to her son, and Noah just loved him. So she knew to make this relationship work, she was going to need to be a part of mending Ed's relationship with Charlie.

"She's gorgeous - has my eyes and wears them much better than I do." Ed joked, knowing how much Olivia raved about his eyes. It earned him a playful slap in the chest and a chuckle.

"Majored in Journalism and is focusing on sports writing. Was able to snag an internship with ESPN when she transferred up here. Says she plans to keep working for them, though right now she feels like a 'glorified barista in a world of men', which I can only imagine. She has a place in Brooklyn with roommates, though I don't know how many. And she doesn't like peanut butter, which I found out when I went up to buy dessert and came back with peanut butter pie. She looked like she might gag."

"Peanut butter is kind of gross." Olivia agreed with Charlie, knowing it would irk Ed.

"Who are you people that don't like peanut butter?" They both just laughed.

"Momma, what so funny out here?" Noah came toddling out to the couch, rubbing his little eyes. Olivia immediately scooped him up to cuddle him as he woke himself up further.

"Tucky is funny, Noah. Isn't Tucky just so funny?" Olivia cooed at him, while Ed began to tickle the boy.

"Tucky!" Noah squealed and giggled, trying to escape. Ed relented and looked on with love as the boy cuddled in further to his mom.

"You both look perfect sitting there. Just perfect." He said, as he leaned in to kiss Noah's head and Olivia's lips.

"So, when will you see Charlie next?" Olivia asked, wanting to know more.

"Well, I asked if I could take her to dinner one night next week. She agreed. So that's something, right?"

"Definitely. I'm so happy for you. And proud of you." Ed ducked his eyes at the compliment.

"Don't be proud of me for doing something I should've been doing all along."

Olivia, wanting to lighten the evening, deposited Noah onto Ed's lap and stood up.

"Okay, crazy men in my life, what's for dinner?"

"You're going to cook?" Ed asked incredulously. Olivia glared at him.

"Noah, does mommy cook?" Ed asked Noah, mischievously.

"Nooooooo. Mommy no cook. Mommy cook food on phone."

Olivia just kept glaring at Ed, who was looking at her with bigger smirk than usual.

"Yes, Noah. I'm going to pick up my phone and Seamless for you and me. Tucky is on his own."

Ed just laughed.


	4. Chapter 4

The next few weeks had been trying for Ed and Olivia. They were both reinstated to their positions and were struggling to get back into the old routine. Noah, used to having both Olivia and Ed doting during the day, was not pleased about being back in preschool and day care for 10 hours a day. Ed, begrudgingly, even had to cancel his planned dinner with Charlie because of a case that kept him in the office for 3 days straight. That added to his crankiness, as he knew that was just deepening the rift between him and his daughter. He had rescheduled for this evening, as he was promised the weekend off once he finished up his paperwork.

11:00am found him rushing out of the office and heading to the park, where Olivia and Noah were currently waiting for him. The anxiety of seeing Charlie again, after his work conflict, had him needing nicotine on his way - so he snuck in half a cigarette as he made his way over. They promised the young boy a picnic by his favorite playground, if only he would stop throwing tantrums every morning at preschool. Noah, already knowing how to work the adults in his life, had skeptically agreed, though he never actually smiled when being dropped off.

As Ed approached the park, he saw Noah digging in the sand with his plastic dump truck and Olivia sitting on the bench right next to him. He stopped for a minute just to observe them. Liv watched her son closely, and he would look up every now and then and enthusiastically tell her something. As excited as Noah would get every time Ed came over, nothing replaced the way he looked at his mother. He adored her, and his eyes spoke that daily. As Ed stood there, lost in thought, Olivia had pointed him out to a sand covered Noah.

"Cap'in!" Little Noah yelled out his favorite nickname for Ed and then made a beeline for his friend. Tucker, elated that he got this reaction, scooped him up immediately. Noah buried his little face in Ed's neck and gripped his shirt.

"Hey little man, what's shakin?"

Noah looked up to begin to answer when all of a sudden he started coughing. Ed initially thought it was just a normal fit, but after about 30 seconds he noticed that Noah began to wheeze in addition to the coughing. He face was slowly turning shades of red and his little eyes looked fearful.

"Olivia!" Ed yelled to his girlfriend in alarm. The little boy was definitely too much trouble getting air. He knew that Noah battled with asthma and breathing early on, but that seemed to even out with consistent medical care. Apparently, he was wrong.

Olivia darted over to them, her face filled with panic. Ed was always level-headed, so the tone of his voice had frightened her.

"What happened?" She asked as she took Noah from Ed, dropped to the ground, and began to calmly coach him to take deep breaths.

"I don't know" Tucker responded, as calmly as he could, tho he was sure panic was heard loud and clear in his voice. "He ran to me and gave me a hug, and all of a sudden this was happening."

Olivia looked up at him and narrowed her eyes a bit.

"You were smoking on the way over here, weren't you?"

"I had half a cigarette…." All of a sudden it dawned on him.

"Oh my god, Liv. Noah I'm sorry buddy. I didn't even think. Where's his inhaler?" Ed was talking faster and faster.

"It's in my bag by the bench. Run." Liv said, authoritatively and a bit too short for Ed's liking.

Ed took off, located the bag and returned promptly. Olivia was still calmly looking Noah in the eyes and helping him take some breaths so the boy's panic wouldn't escalate.

"Its okay, sweet boy, I've got your inhaler right here. See? It's okay. Mommy's going to make it better. Just keep breathing, baby." She was cooing assurances as she snatched the bag from Ed's hands and began to root for the inhaler and tube.

"Here, let me get this thing together." Ed offered, kneeling next to them.

"I've got it." Liv snapped back, clearly still in panicked mommy mode, but also with a hint of anger towards her boyfriend.

Ed leaned back and helplessly watched as Olivia, one handed, got the inhaler hooked up to the tube and placed over Noah's little mouth. As he began to inhale the drugs, Tucker noticed that Olivia was visibly calming down. He, himself, was still a nervous wreck.

"Is he okay?" He quietly asked Liv, who was rocking her little boy as he continued to breath through the inhaler.

"He should be for now. I want to get him changed, so he doesn't have residual smoke on him." She responded just as quietly, her eyes still glued to her baby boy.

"Just keep breathing, baby boy. Mommy's here. You just breathe. I love you, Noah. I'm right here." Olivia kept repeating these phrases over and over.

That's when the guilt hit. He had just caused that little boy an asthma attack. It was his fault. He smoked a cigarette and 10 minutes later Noah inhaled it off of his body and needed help breathing.

"Liv…I didn't even think. Christ, I'm sorry." Tucker said, anguish apparent in his voice.

"Not now, Ed." Olivia said, clearly still worried about getting Noah's breathing back to normal. "I don't want to have this conversation with you until we are back at my apartment."

"Sure."

"But you need to go shower and change before you step inside my home again. And lose the pack of cigarettes in your pocket." Olivia finally looked up to meet his eyes. He could see the anger, but also fear, all over her face.

"Whatever you want." He said. And he meant it.

2 hours later, Noah was asleep on Olivia's lap when a freshly showered Ed Tucker unlocked the apartment door. He immediately met Liv's eyes and could see the worry and exhaustion in them. Ed slowly discarded his shoes and coat and made his way to them.

"How's he doing?" He asked quietly, softly running his fingers through the boy's hair.

"Good. No more wheezing or coughing. He was just tired and clingy, so I'm keeping him with me for nap time." Liv was still gazing down at her son, who was sleeping peacefully against her chest. His little fingers still gripped her sweater tightly. Tucker had never seen a more beautiful sight.

"Liv…" He began, unsure he wanted to talk this out but knowing they had to.

"What time are you meeting Charlie? You can't cancel on her again." Her tone was soft, but all business.

"I've got a couple of hours before I need to leave." Ed replied, trying to catch Liv's eyes. She was avoiding them very well. Finally she took a deep breath and looked up at him.

"This cannot happen again. Period." Her stern, interrogation voice unnerved Tucker just a bit.

"Olivia, I didn't realize…I didn't think…Christ…I'm sorry. God, I'm sorry. I never want to cause hurt or pain to either of you. And I caused him to have an asthma attack." Tucker just blurted it all out, his voice cracking at the end. Guilt was not even a strong enough term for how he was feeling. He loved them. So much. He's supposed to protect them from pain and suffering, not cause it. Yet, Noah had a terrifying attack and Olivia was scared out of her mind all because of him.

"Ed," She started, clearly trying to muster up some courage to say what was on her mind. Ed's heart sank. He felt nauseas. This was it. She was telling him to get lost. He couldn't lose them.

"I don't want you to be around my son until you have quit smoking. Quite frankly, I don't think you should be around me until that point as well. I do not want any hint of smoke brought into this home by the two people Noah relies on the most."

There. She delivered it. He heard it. And he let it sink in. She wasn't breaking up with him. She was giving him an ultimatum. She was also including him in the parenting pool with Noah. So Ed just looked at her for a long while.

"Olivia, I will never pick up another cigarette again. I promise. I know it may be hard at times, but goddammit today scared the shit out of me."

"I know. I know it did. But I'm not taking any chances."

"How long until you trust that I've kicked this habit?" Tucker asked, scared and a little hurt that she's forcing a hiatus on them after he promised to quit immediately, cold turkey. Which is not an easy thing to do.

"I don't know. I can't give you a timeline here. Hopefully not long." She responded, unsure how to put a time frame on what she was feeling.

"You don't trust that I was scared enough today to never pick another pack up again." Tucker stated, unable to hide the pain in his voice at the thought of having to spend time away from them.

"Ed, quitting is really hard. I understand that. I care about you, and I want what is best for you. Physically but also emotionally. So I want you to quit the best way for you so it sticks. You can't rush into it without looking at the available options for support, only to backslide. Because this is it. I'm putting my foot down. Noah and I will be gone from your life if anything like this happens again." Olivia spoke the words as the tears rolled down her face. Ed knew that she loved him, though she wouldn't say the words. And he knew that this was hard for her as well. But it still hurt him.

"I will do whatever you want me to do, Olivia. I swear." He has never felt more strongly about a statement in his life. He will do anything for the woman and child sat in front of him. This would be the last day Ed Tucker ever smoked a cigarette.


	5. Chapter 5

Conversation between Ed and Charlie had been awkward, at best. Ed had arrived at the Italian eatery well in advance, both out of nerves and desire to not have his daughter wait on him any longer. Charlie walked in not too far after that, also appearing to be anxious about their dinner date. Tucker greeted her with a big smile and a hug, while she still seemed a little tense and just patted him on the back. Now they were seated, and Ed studied her body language as she stirred her mojito and stared at the swirling ice.

"What made you decide on sports writing?" Ed asked. "I remember you loving ball as a kid…"

Charlie looked up and gave him a small, surprised smile.

"Yeah, sports were a bigger deal when we moved down to Florida. Played softball and basketball all through high school, did club ball in college while working on my degree. I guess I used it to release a lot of emotions." Charlie responded, seemingly happy to talk about her love for sports. Finally, a breakthrough in conversation.

"Oh yeah? What positions?" Ed asked, eager to keep this level of openness going.

"Second. I always wanted to pitch, but mom wouldn't pay for extra lessons, so other girls were always way better than me."

Ed eyed his daughter for a while, weighing whether or not to just go for it. _Oh what the hell_ , he thought.

"I would've hired a pitching coach for you if I had known that is what you wanted."

Charlie immediately looked up and got tense again. But she didn't say anything, just stared at her father. So he continued.

"I know I screwed up when you were younger, but I would've done anything for you. I will still do anything for you." Ed's voice broke a bit at the end of that statement, as he felt that love for his daughter just rush to the surface of his entire being.

She still remained silent, but had gone back to her distraction of stirring the mojito for several minutes. The silence between them was almost suffocating. Then she took a deep breath and looked up again.

"Except actually be around when I still lived up here. Or attempt to come visit when we moved. Or offer to let me come stay with you for summers. Or call on my birthday." It all just came rushing out of her, and she couldn't stop it. "You never came to my games when we lived here and after we moved all I got was a birthday card with cash. I was alone down in Florida, and you just made it worse."

Ed swallowed the tears that threatened to surface, but he was also confused. What was she talking about? Had she not known all of his desperate attempts to see her?

"What do you mean? I called every year on your birthday, but had to leave a message asking you to call me when you could. And I would ask every year for you to come stay with me for a couple of weeks in the summer, but your mother said you attended camps and didn't have the time to come up."

Charlie said nothing. She just gazed at him. Her eyes showed so much inner turmoil and pain. Ed let her process, then reached across and took her hand.

"Charlie, I know I wasn't a good dad when you were younger. Or really at all. But when your mom moved away with you, it was a wake up call. I was devastated. But I thought I already blew it and you hated me. So I just left it alone, not wanting to cause you any more pain than I already had. I thought staying away was what you wanted. So I did."

Tears began to pool in Charlie's eyes as he continued to speak passionately to her. If what Olivia had said about a girl always hoping her father would reappear was true, then he intended to fulfill it for his daughter.

"You're my daughter. I love you, Charlie. And I will do or be whatever you want me to from here on out. I promise you. I'm not going anywhere."

That was it. The damn of tears broke for Charlie and she began to cry silently, her shoulders shaking.

"Hey…don't cry, baby." Ed said as he squeezed her hand in both of his. He couldn't tell if he had done the wrong thing by opening up or not. And the longer she stayed silent, with tears streaming, his panic escalated.

"Charlie…"

"I just need a minute." She finally responded, and excused herself to the ladies room.

"Fuck…" Ed let out the word along with the deep breath he had been holding in this entire dinner. Did he just royally screw up again? Did he say too much? Was she actually climbing out of the restroom window?

He needed Olivia. And he was going to text her, to hell with if she was mad at him.

Ed: _She's in the bathroom crying. What do I do?_

Olivia: _What did you say? Why is she crying?_

Ed: _I got a little emotional. Told her I wasn't going anywhere and that I was sorry. That I loved her._

Olivia: _She's just overwhelmed. Give her time and space._

Ed: _I think she's climbing out of the bathroom window._

Olivia: _Stop being ridiculous. There are no windows in the ladies room for just that reason._

Ed: _I actually just laughed. Thank you. Can I call you when I get home?_

Olivia: _Please._

Ed let out a deep breath. At least Olivia wasn't ignoring him considering she had every right to after what happened today with Noah. This was just not his day. He needed another bourbon. Just as he requested a refill for both of their drinks, he saw Charlie coming towards him. She had clearly pulled herself together, because there were no signs of tears on her face.

"Hey, are you okay?" Ed asked, before she could even get settled in her seat.

"I'm fine, sorry. I just wasn't expecting that." Charlie said, with almost a distance in her voice. This worried Ed, as he feared she may be putting up walls he had just broken down.

"Let's talk about more light-hearted things, huh? Like your favorite baseball team." Ed offered, hoping to keep her open to him.

"Yankees baseball is not a light-hearted topic." Charlie responded with a smirk. His smirk. And he just laughed.

"I stand corrected. The Yanks, huh? You been to the new stadium?"

"Once. I got to go with my internship after it was first built. But I haven't been back. Too expensive." Charlie replied, finally getting her appetite and digging into her angel hair pasta dish.

"Well, the season just started. Why don't I get us tickets? I've been looking for an excuse to purchase an updated jersey and hit up a game."

Charlie smiled at him. "Sure, that would be fun."

"Great." Tucker said, as he began to focus on his meal as well. In fact, they both sat in a more comfortable silence and ate for a bit. But Tucker would look up and observe her at times. He could tell her mind was churning and that she was wanting to say something. He decided to let it be for now. Then he saw her put her fork down and look back up at him.

"Did you remarry?" It was delivered with a blunt tone, almost like she was expecting the worst but felt she had to ask.

"No. Never did." He responded. Then decided to continue. "I am seeing someone right now. Olivia. Or I think I'm still seeing her. She's currently ticked at me for being a dumbass."

Charlie chuckled a little, which was his goal with that last statement.

"Way to go. What, exactly, did you do?" She asked, clearly enjoying the playful banter.

"Ah, well, sometimes I smoke when I'm stressed. I had done so on my way to meet her and her son at the park, and he ended up having an asthma attack. So she's rightfully pissed at me." Ed explained, hoping that Charlie wouldn't be turned off by any of this, both the smoking and his dating.

"I remember you smoking," Charlie thought out loud. "You never did around me tho. I just remember smelling it on your clothes."

"Yeah, a nasty habit. That I'm now officially trying to quit so I don't lose them." He responded, almost automatically.

Charlie studied him a bit, her eyes seemingly clouded.

"How old is her son?" She asked, trying to swallow the pill of him playing dad to someone else.

"He's almost 3. And pretty hilarious. You'll love him." Ed responded without even thinking, just assuming she would eventually want to meet Noah and Olivia. But he regretted it once it was out, because Charlie wasn't responding.

"A 3 year old? You robbing the cradle, old man?" Charlie finally said, putting his worry at ease for the moment and giving him the Tucker smirk once again. He just laughed.

"Nah, she's a late in life bloomer. Turns out, when you are a cop, it takes you longer to figure out how to be a parent." That statement was made both about Olivia and himself.

"That makes sense, though, you dating another cop. Someone who can understand the craziness like mom never could." Charlie, once again, just thought out loud. Ed was surprised that she even acknowledged that. Granted, his daughter was now a grown woman.

"Charlie, why don't you talk to your mom anymore?" Ed asked, trying to understand the place she was in right now. But she immediately tensed up and was stumbling for an answer.

"It's ok, you can tell me the truth." He encouraged her. But to no avail. The answer that came out was definitely a cover, though it likely had some truth to it.

"We had a fight and she's wrapped up in my half-sister now. No room for me. Hey, do you mind if I wrap the leftovers and take home?"

"Ah, the classic change of subject. I can take a hint. And sure. You want to get a dessert to take as well?" Ed offered, now in full-on parent mode. He had to make sure she had food in her apartment.

"Nah, I'm trying to cut back on the amount of cheesecake I consume."

"Raincheck on the dessert then?" Tucker asked, hoping they could set up the next time they saw each other before she disappeared into the night.

"Definitely. Next weekend? It's a crazy work week for me with the draft and all."

"Absolutely. I'll text you a few suggestions." Tucker threw down some bills as they began to rise from their table.

"Hey, dad?" Charlie looked up and Ed felt his heart leap. She had just called him 'dad'.

"What is it?" He gently asked. Preparing himself for whatever it was that she was about to throw at him.

"Thanks…you know…for reaching out." The words were quiet and hesitant, but he knew she meant them. He put his arm around her as the walked out and he hailed a cab for her, unable to formulate words at that point.

"Dad, I'm taking the subway home. A cab to Brooklyn will be $60!"

"No you aren't, it's late. Here's money." He handed her a $100 bill. She just stared at him, dumbfounded.

"Get used to this, Charlie. Dad's don't like their daughter's riding the subway at night." He pulled her in for a hug after the statement and kissed her cheek.

"I love you, Charlie." He spoke to her as she climbed into the back of the cab and he closed the door. Ed Tucker watched the car pull away and just stood on the sidewalk for a bit, lost in thought. The dinner had gone better than he expected, but there were still so many missing pieces to this puzzle. Whatever it was that sent her back to New York City was big enough that she wouldn't talk about it. And he was determined to find out.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Thanks for the follows and reviews. This is my first go at writing fanfic so I appreciate all the feedback. Keep it coming! But...back to the story.**_

* * *

It had been a little over week since the incident with Ed and Noah, and luckily for Olivia, life had been too busy to really reflect on how much she was missing him. That is, until today. She had the day off and it was gorgeous out, so she packed a bag and her and Noah were on the F train towards Coney Island. She couldn't remember the last time that she went to Coney Island when it didn't involve some type of investigation.

Noah was beside himself on the subway. He stood on his knees on the seat to watch out the window as they flew passed, well, the walls of the subway tube. None the less, he was enthralled.

"We go FAST mommy" he had exclaimed multiple times. Each time Olivia would chuckle a bit and shake her head at him. She was pretty sure she could take him on an hour long subway ride and he would be perfectly content.

"We go play in sand?" Noah finally plopped himself in Liv's lap, and went back to his endless questions about their adventure.

"Yep! We can play in the sand, ride some rides, eat a hotdog. Whatever you want, sweet boy." Olivia was just so excited to have a day, just the two of them. It was rare that they got this kind of time together.

"Cap-in come too?" He looked up at her with those innocent and hopeful eyes, and Olivia's heart cracked a bit.

"Not today, baby. Cap-in is working so it is Mommy and Noah day!" She tried to answer as enthusiastically as she could to curb the disappointment the boy felt about having gone so long without seeing Ed. He had been asking her daily about when he would see his friend next, and each time Olivia felt more and more conflicted about how long was enough. She knew Ed felt horrible about what happened, and she was confident he would never smoke and come around Noah again. But the incident had scared her so much, that she needed to feel like she was back in control. The little boy missed his friend deeply, and to be honest, so did she.

"Cap-in like hotdogs, Mommy. We get them in park." Noah recited, as he reminisced on the numerous park dates he had with Ed. They had a little routine, apparently. They'd eat the hotdog, feed the bun to the birds, run around, then get ice cream on the way home. The first time, Ed had tried to sneak it by her, but Noah came running in covered in the milky substance, so his cover was blown.

"Maybe we can call him once we get to the beach with our hotdogs?" Noah looked up at her with his inquisitive eyes. Almost as if to say, 'why can't he just come play'? Olivia was saved of the guilt trip when the train pulled into the stop. She scooped Noah into the little umbrella stroller, threw on the backpack, and exited the train. Olivia strolled them towards the Luna Park beach entrance, and noticed it was not as crowded as she had anticipated. Since it was a Monday, she had to assume most people were at work or school.

Noah was pointing at just about everything he saw. He was too little to ride most of the attractions, but that didn't stop him from pointing each one out to his mother in hopes he would get to ride something. Olivia finally stopped in the kiddie section and squatted down next to him.

"Do you want to ride something before we play in the sand?" She asked the boy, knowing his answer already.

"YESSSSSSSS" he exclaimed with more excitement than ever. He immediately began to fidget and try to unhook himself from the stroller.

"Slow down, little man. You stay RIGHT HERE by mommy, ok?" Olivia sternly spoke to the boy as she lifted him out of his seat. Noah was very conscientious of following the rules. He never seemed to want to run far from his mother, but she felt the need to tell him anyways. True to form, Noah diligently stood right next to her as she put their bags in the stroller seat. She took his hand and started towards the ticket line.

* * *

Two hours later, the duo was sitting on a beach blanket next to the playground area. Noah was happily making things in the sand and exclaiming to Liv each time he completed one. Olivia thought she was lucky he wanted to show her what they were, because they rarely resembled anything of the sort. Finally the boy crawled into her lap. He'd had a big day so far.

"We call Cap-in now? He come play?" Noah asked quietly.

"Yes, baby." Olivia pulled out her phone, hit Facetime next to Ed's name, and let Noah hold the phone in his little hands. When Ed picked up the phone, Noah got so excited that he smothered his face to the phone screen to try and talk to him. Ed just laughed on the other end.

"Hey, buddy! Scoot back a bit so I can see your whole face!"

"I ride race car!" Noah exclaimed happily. "I go FAST and win all the prizes."

"Wow! That sounds exciting. Did you beat mommy?" Tucker asked playfully, and he smirked into the phone knowing that Liv could see him.

"Mommy too big to ride. Just Noah ride cars." He said, almost as if Ed was silly to ask such a question.

"Did you have a hotdog for lunch, too?"

"Yessssssss. But no feeding birds here. It a rule." He said the last statement with an exaggerated disappointment, knowing how to work the adults in his life. Ed just laughed, again.

Olivia leaned down to rest her chin on Noah's shoulder, so she could get in on the Facetime action. "How's your day?"

"Same ole, same ole. Lots of paperwork. Should actually get out on time for once." He said, a little less enthusiastically. Likely because he knew he was heading to an empty apartment, and not one with his girlfriend and cute little boy.

"Cap-in you come play?" Noah innocently asked, not realizing the reason that Ed had been MIA. The question tugged at the heart strings of both adults, and Olivia watched as Ed tried to hide how much it had effected him.

"How are you doing, you know, with that?" Olivia asked quietly, trying to gauge how much longer this would have to go on.

"Good. Got a patch. Seems to be working. Though, I hope you know that after what happened I will never allow myself one again." Tucker spoke the words while staring directly at his girlfriend through the phone. Hoping to get through to her. He was miserable without seeing them, even in a passing, every other day. Olivia gave him a small smile.

"I know. I trust you." She said, preparing to possibly say something else. But Noah interrupted.

"KITE!" He exclaimed, pointing to the sky. Sure enough, the group next to them had brought a kite and Noah was beside himself trying to cheer on their flight. "It in the SKY, Cap-in!"

Ed smiled bigger than usual as he responded, "That's pretty cool Noah. Maybe we can teach you how to fly a kite soon?"

"Today?" He asked, not very patient with this soon talk.

"Ed…." Olivia began slowly, trying to work her way to a decision. "Why don't you come over for dinner tonight, so Noah can tell you all about our day? Maybe bring some clothes for work tomorrow." She added with a little smile, giving away that she, too, missed her boyfriend.

"Really?" He asked, a little surprised at the offer.

"I miss you. Please come over tonight. Just make sure your stuff has been dry cleaned…." She had to add the last part, not to be a bitch but to make sure she covered her bases as a mommy.

"You hear that Noah, how about I come over tonight when you get home?"

"Mommy, we go home now so Cap-in play." Noah exclaimed his orders, giving away his complete dedication to being friends with Ed Tucker.

"No ice cream?" Liv asked, surprised at her little boy.

"Ok. Ice Cream. Then Cap-in." Noah decided firmly. "Come on, Mommy!"

"I'll see you tonight?" Olivia asked, scrambling to pack up their bag and keep up with Noah who was determined to conquer his new plans.

"Absolutely, baby." Tucker replied. "Thank you." Olivia smiled and waved as she ended the call, and hurried after her overly excited 3 year old.

* * *

Later that night, Ed and Olivia were cuddled up on the couch while Noah quietly played with his blocks on the floor. He was exhausted, but was not at all interested in going to bed. To be honest, Olivia was enjoying the quiet moment with her 2 guys, so she was letting it go for now. She felt Ed kiss the side of her head.

"Thank you. For giving me a second chance." His voice was thick and gruff, but she could hear the emotion in the words. So she turned to look at him.

"Of course. Ed, I know you didn't mean for that to happen. And I know you've been beating yourself up over it since. It just scared me to the point I needed to regain control."

They didn't say anything for a bit, just looked at each other, seemingly trying to memorize the other's features. Ed reached up and tucked her hair behind her ear and leaned in for a kiss. It was quick, but deep and conveyed their feelings to one another.

"I never want to be the reason you experience pain, Olivia. You or Noah. And I will fight for the rest of my life to make sure that is never the case again. I….well, I love you. I love you so much." Olivia felt her heart skip as his words permeated her being. It was almost too much for her, but it still felt right. She just kept gazing into his eyes, unable to find the words to respond. Lucky for her, he didn't expect her to, and put his finger to her lips.

"It's okay, Liv. You don't have to be there yet. But I just want you to know that you are loved. Deeply. By me and by Noah." That was it. The damn opened up and tears just flowed down her face. So she pulled him to her and kissed him with all she had. She could feel his fingers swiping her tears away and when she pulled back, she realized she was ready as well.

"I love you too, Ed. I really do." It was a shaky whisper, but it was sincere. As they sat with each other, in comfortable silence, she remembered Noah was still in the room, albeit very silent. When she turned her head, she had to hold back a laugh. Noah was out cold on the floor, his one hand still tightly gripping a block and the other hand under his head. The day had completely exhausted him.

Olivia managed to snap a few pictures of him before Ed carefully picked the boy up and they walked back to his bedroom. She pulled his covers down as he cautiously laid the boy down in his bed and covered him up. He didn't even budge. Olivia leaned down to kiss her little boy, and her lips lingered on his forehead.

"I love you, baby boy. More than anything. Sweet dreams."

Ed helped her straighten back up and they headed to her bedroom. As soon as the door was closed, her lips were on his and her hands were pulling his hips to her. They didn't break apart as they maneuvered themselves out of their clothes and into her bed.

Later that night, and several rounds of love-making later, they both laid limp against each other. Ed had gotten up to grab pajamas for them both, in case Noah came wandering in. Now their legs and arms were tangled and their foreheads were touching. Olivia was tracing the outline of his face with her fingertips and every now and then, Ed would move his mouth to kiss them as they moved about. She had never felt so content and satisfied in her entire life. Olivia felt Ed breath in deeply, as he always did before he started talking.

"What do you think about getting together with Charlie? I want her to feel like she's a part of my life." Ed had been nervous about bringing this up, as he felt like it was a big step for some reason.

"I'd love that. I want to meet her. Has she opened up any more with you?"

"No more than she did that first night for dinner. I know there's something she is hiding, but you were right. I didn't need to investigate. I just need to let her come to me when she's ready. And, maybe, feeling like she belongs in our unit will help."

This was the Ed Tucker that Olivia fell in love with. He deeply loved those in his life, despite the outer appearance he gave on the job. And she could tell that he was 100% committed to fixing whatever was going on with his daughter. So she was going to help him.

"Call her tomorrow and let's make a plan."

Ed just smiled at her. "Thank you."

She gave him a quick kiss, then rolled over and spooned back into him. She felt his breath on her neck as he spoke.

"Goodnight baby. I love you."


	7. Chapter 7

_**Two updates in one day! They won't always come this fast, but I was anxious to get this one out...hope you enjoy. Don't forget to leave a review!**_

* * *

Olivia sat back on the blanket they had spread out on the grass and observed Ed trying to teach Noah how to throw a baseball. She had to laugh, though, because the little boy didn't seem to be very coordinated at this age. Ed was determined, so she just let them be. Instead she turned her focus on the young woman sitting next to her. Wavy brown hair flowed across her face in the wind, but Olivia was too busy noticing how she had her dad's jaw structure. When Tucker was tense or nervous, you could tell in how he held his jaw. Charlie seemed to be the exact same way.

They had made their way to Brooklyn's waterfront park to meet up. Olivia figured Noah would love to see the bridge and all the buildings, and maybe ride the carousel. She also knew that it would be neutral ground, so to speak. They would go to the borough that Charlie lived in, so she was comfortable and familiar. Though the girl still seemed to be a little stiff and closed off, despite her smiles and gestures to play with Noah.

They got the introductions out of the way quickly, but Noah was especially taken with the new addition to their park date. "Tar-lie" was as good as he could get, but it seemed to warm the girl's heart a bit as she knelt down to high-five the boy. She also produced a kid-sized baseball mitt and softer version of a baseball for him. Noah's face lit up as he looked to his mom and Ed.

"LOOK! Tar-lie brought baseball! Cap-in, you teach?" Charlie stood back up, seemingly pleased with herself on the successful gift.

"I hope you don't mind me bringing him something. I saw it the other day, and couldn't help myself." Charlie's voice had a bit of a southern twang to it, but not too much. It was endearing.

"Not at all. He is so excited to have a ball and glove." Olivia gushed, trying to make Charlie feel as comfortable as possible. They all set out to find a good space in the grass to set up camp. Ed had mixed up some margaritas in a tupperware container, hoping that it would help ease the initial awkwardness of meeting. They quickly put a dent in the drink, sipping slowly from blue solo cups.

"Red ones just seem classless" Ed had stated when they were at the store. Olivia laughed at the ludicrous statement. As if the color of the cup made it any more classy to sneak drinks into a park.

Ed had mentioned on the way over that he secretly was hoping Charlie would open up more to Liv. He was still convinced that there was some big secret. Olivia had advised him not to snoop and investigate behind Charlie's back.

"You have to gain her trust, Ed. Don't betray her this early on by snooping. She will talk when she's ready. Just be there for her." Olivia was gentle, but firm in how she spoke to him. She didn't not want to see this blow up in anyone's face. Especially if Ed was right about Charlie's past. Now as the two ladies sat on the blanket together, Olivia was grateful for the abundance of alcohol Ed insisted on bringing along. Liquid courage. Because her boyfriend was definitely right about his daughter. Something was up.

"How are you enjoying working at ESPN? Your dad mentioned it can be crazy hours at times."

Charlie jumped a bit, having been in a little trance, but recovered enough to answer. "Sorry. Um, it's good. I like it. Though I wish I was actually writing and investigating more. Right now I just sort of, well, assist everyone" she mused, and continued on. "It seems difficult for a girl to break into the sports world, so we'll see how long I last."

"I can definitely understand that, though I'm sure the police force may actually be a bit kinder to woman than sports?" Olivia posed it a bit as a question, because in all honesty, it was rough on women police officers too.

"Hmmm. I don't know about that. Maybe hard in different ways?" Charlie finally looked up and made brief eye contact with Olivia. "For the most part, everyone is really nice. But you can tell they are unsure about any of the females moving up in the ranks, as far as our responsibilities."

"Same with NYPD. Male cops have a hard time trusting female cops. In fact, early on in my career I struggled with several partners, before finding one that I worked well with. And even then, there was this weird dynamic, simply because I was a woman. We had some cases that almost broke us." Olivia mused, hoping that if she were open, Charlie would be too.

"I can only imagine. Dad mentioned you run a unit now? Special Victims?"

"I do. Being the boss has its positives and negatives. Less time out in the field, putting myself in danger. But more responsibility and, honestly, I feel much more responsible for the outcome of cases now. Which I wasn't sure was possible."

"I can see how that would be the case…" Charlie spoke quietly, turning her eyes back to the baseball lessons going on. But Olivia's eyes stayed on Charlie, assessing her next move.

"You know, Charlie, your dad is really happy to have you back in his life. And I'm pretty excited to have you in mine now too, if you'd like to be?" Olivia posed the statement to her gently, but hoping it would make the girl feel like they wanted her around. Because they did. Charlie looked up at her with those blue eyes of her dad's. You could see so much emotion in them, it was almost breathtaking.

"Thank you. I…" Charlie's voice broke a bit. But she recovered. "I'm happy about this too." She smiled at Liv and wiped a stray tear. _Progress,_ thought Olivia. _But don't push it._

"What made you decide on New York from Florida? Did it just feel like home to you?" Olivia asked, genuinely interested in the answer to that. She had to assume that part of the reason Charlie came back was because she was born here, and likely felt a connection to the place.

"Sort of" Charlie began, then hesitated before continuing. "I hadn't been happy in Florida for a while, especially once my mom remarried. I thought going off to college would fix that. It did for a bit, but then…"

Olivia turned her entire body to focus on her next words. "Go on" she gently coached. Charlie looked up at her, and she could read the hesitation, but also the desire to let go, all over her face.

"I, um, well…I wound up in a bad situation and couldn't get out of it. I wasn't being left alone and the university wasn't helping, so I decided to transfer. New York was the only other place I'd lived. I knew that even though my dad hadn't been around much, that at least he would be in the same city if I needed something. One of my professors helped me put together the materials, and made a few calls, and the next thing I knew I was on a plane up here."

Olivia let all of that sink in, and she allowed the girl a break from talking. They sat in a comfortable silence, but Olivia decided to keep prodding since she was having some success. And she had a terrible feeling about what she was going to uncover.

"Charlie…what kind of bad situation?" Olivia asked cautiously, but with her full self, wanting Charlie to know she was listening and hearing her. But as soon as the question was out, she noticed Charlie begin to look around and her breathing pick up. It looked like she was going to have an anxiety attack. So she backtracked on her question.

"Hey, Charlie, it's ok. We don't have to talk about it here, ok? Just hang out with me and watch your dad fail at teaching Noah baseball, ok?" Liv reached over and took the girl's hand to try and calm her down. It seemed to work and she looked at her appreciatively.

"Thanks, Olivia." She got a smile out of the girl, and feeling confident she was back to normal, she turned to the boys and yelled for them to come back over.

"What do you all say to some shaved ice? I see a truck over there. Charlie and I can take a walk." Of course, Noah was all over that idea. But insisted he come too.

"Let's go, Tar-lie." He said as he grabbed her hand and started off. Charlie stalled a bit, offering to go with Noah while the older adults took a break.

"Thanks, sweetie. Here's some money. Noah you stay with Charlie." Olivia spoke but they had already taken off, Noah hanging onto Charlie's back while she skipped along with him. You could hear laughter from both of them. Liv turned and happily sunk onto the blanket with Ed. They both observed the Manhattan skyline for a bit before Ed began his questions, clearly unable to wait any longer.

"What did you two talk about? She open up any? Is she ok?" He asked, trying not to sound anxious, but failing miserably.

"Just got to know each other, babe. Now isn't the place to rehash our conversation, but I'll catch you up tonight when we are home. For now, just enjoy being all together, ok? Trust the bonds that are forming." Olivia looked up at Ed when she said that last sentence. It had multiple meanings, because so many bonds were happening here. Her and Ed's relationship was growing stronger, Charlie seemed to be opening up slowly with both of them, and Noah was just determined to have everyone in his life all the time.

But Ed was still on edge. "It's going to be okay, isn't it?" He asked, just needing reassurance from the woman he trusted most in the world.

"I hope so. Maybe we hit some bumps, and maybe there is some pain, but we are all together now and we will conquer it all together."

* * *

Later that night found the couple sitting on opposite ends of the couch, their feet touching, while Ed nursed a beer and Olivia sipped at a tea. Soft music was playing in the background, just enough to give some background noise but not loud enough to wake Noah. The two seemed perfectly content to just share space with each other, not really speaking. But now it was Olivia's mind churning, not Ed's. She couldn't shake the conversation she had earlier with his daughter. Nor could she figure out how to talk about it with Ed, without him going into full investigation and blowing their progress. But he knew her too well.

"I know you aren't telling me something, because you are afraid I'll go off the deep end." Ed stated, trying to be funny, but also knowing he was right. Olivia just laughed a little and looked at him.

"Well, you've been known to find the deep end before…" she poked back at him. But also used it as a warning. If she was going to dive into this with him, she had to be able to reign him in before he went ballistic.

"True, but this time I have a life jacket" he responded, looking lovingly at Olivia. She saw him smirk, and knew he was playing her, but it worked. So she took a deep breath.

"Charlie mentioned that she 'got into a bad situation' in college and that people wouldn't leave her alone. Said the university wouldn't help her, so she had no choice but to transfer and get away." Olivia spoke quietly, trying to read Ed's reaction as he took in her words. His face was stoic, the characteristic Tucker jaw stayed in place.

"What kind of situation?" He asked, while rubbing the back of his neck as he let this sink in.

"She didn't say. When I asked, she started to have what looked like a panic attack, so I quickly put an end to the conversation and moved on to lighter stuff. But to me, it sounded like she didn't feel safe down there and that her school was not protecting her." Ed's eyes seemed to snap to hers when she mentioned the panic.

"Panic attack?" Ed's breathing was also getting a little fast as his mind filled with worse case scenarios. Olivia leaned forward, taking his hands in hers to try and soothe him.

"Ed, I think whatever happened to Charlie is going to be very hard for us to hear and very hard for her to say. Right now, we need to keep being there for her and make sure that she can trust us, ok?" Olivia was speaking straight into Ed's heart. She knew he was going to want to launch a full-on investigation as to what the hell happened to his daughter, but that wasn't going to help them or Charlie.

"Olivia…" Ed's voice sounded broken as he just looked at his girlfriend sat in front of him. She maneuvered their bodies so they were resting against each other on the couch, waist to waist, chest to chest, face to face. She cupped his cheek and kissed him lightly.

"I know. It's going to be okay."


	8. Chapter 8

_**Happy Monday!**_

* * *

Ed Tucker was laying in Olivia Benson's bed, just staring at the ceiling. Olivia was sound asleep next to him, but his mind was churning too much to even think about joining her slumber. He couldn't get the entire day out of his head. It had been a rollercoaster of emotion for him. Just watching his daughter play with Noah and see her laugh with Olivia touched his heart in ways he didn't know were possible. It had him feeling like some day, in the future, they could all be a family. Their own little unit. But before that could happen, he had to figure out what the hell happened to Charlie.

His first instinct was that she may have gotten herself into a bad crowd, played around with drugs, and ended up in some trouble. It would make sense, since she had said that her relationship with her mother was frayed. Of course she would get to college and work to find friends and a way to check out. Maybe she had gotten into financial trouble from that, and ended up dodging people. Ed saw this in his line of work all the time. If this were the case, of course she panicked when Olivia, a police officer she barely knew, was questioning her.

But he couldn't shake the fact that there was more to it than that. At this point, he would almost be relieved if it ended up being a drug issue. Because the other scenarios he had in his head made him sick to his stomach. Olivia was very adamant that he not go snooping around, but it was hard for him to just sit back in the dark. Whatever happened was partially his fault anyways, because he hadn't been around. And at this point, he fully deserved the misery he was feeling because of how shitty of a dad he had been. Or at least, that was how his thought were running right now.

He finally gave up on a sleep and softly made his way to the living room to turn on the Yankees replay. For a while he just sat there in the dark, the only light coming from the TV. He kept eying his laptop on the coffee table. But he couldn't pick it up. No. He had to listen to Liv and not go snooping. But the longer he sat there, the harder it became to let it go. Soon he found himself reaching for the device and powering it on. He watched the computer come to life, followed by the blasting of jazz music through the speakers.

"Shit," he muttered to himself and he frantically hit mute. He realized he had forgotten to turn off his Pandora station when he left work. The apartment was now silent again, so he was hoping it didn't wake anyone. As his heart rate slowed down to a normal pace, he opened up Google and pondered whether he should go through with this or not. If he really wanted to, he could call up his buddy from years ago who works with Miami PD and likely get a lot more information than he would on Google. Between Ed's connections as well as his buddy's, there was no telling how much information they could find out. But somehow, making that phone call seemed more of a betrayal than a simple internet search. I mean, who was he really hurting at this point?

"Why are you awake?" Ed startled and turned around to find Olivia standing there in an oversized t-shirt and no pants. "Ed Tucker, you better not be doing what I think you are doing."

"I…well, I wasn't yet" he answered sheepishly, knowing there was no way out of this. He had been caught.

"Babe, you are going to drive yourself crazy with this. Come on, back to bed." She tried to pull him up, but he didn't budge. His eyes were troubled. Olivia sighed, realizing she wasn't getting back to bed anytime soon either, and plopped next to him.

"This is punishment for my being such a terrible father to her. I wasn't around, she got hurt in some way that we still don't know, and now my punishment is to have all these scenarios in my head." Ed just stated this as if it were a hard fact. But it took Olivia's breath away.

"No. No no no," she rushed to correct this line of thinking. "You are NOT being punished. Ed, you made some mistakes. But we all make mistakes. Don't do this to yourself. You can't go back and fix things. All you can do is be present now. Love her now. Support her now."

They sat in silence for a bit, Ed's mind still churning at lightning speed. He absolutely planned on supporting her and protecting her now, but so far he had no clue how. He needed to know what happened in order to fix it.

"Olivia, what if this were Noah. And you knew something happened to him, but he wouldn't tell you. And you could probably find out if you just got to work investigating, are you telling me you wouldn't?" Tucker knew he was hitting her in the gut, but he needed her to understand where his head was at right now.

Olivia sat back and looked at him for a while, taking some deep breaths and thinking about how to answer.

"I suppose I don't know. I hope I would trust him, but if I thought he were in danger, there is nothing I wouldn't do to help him." As she said the words, she finally realized what Ed was feeling. He was feeling like his little girl was hurting, and had possibly been hurt, and it was killing him.

"Liv, what is your gut telling you here? You have the best instincts I've ever known. And if you really tell me you feel she is safe and will come to us, then I will back down. Though I can't promise I'll fall asleep easily." Tucker was looking at her, as if whatever she said next would make or break him.

Olivia let out a deep breath, unsure yet again how to answer his request. She wanted to try and calm him, but if she were honest with herself, she was worried as well.

"I'm concerned" she began cautiously. "When she said that people wouldn't leave her alone, and that she felt she had no choice but to move 1,000 miles away, and that she picked New York because she knew even though you hadn't spoken, that if she really needed something you'd be around….it all just made me feel like she had been in some danger. Wasn't safe." Olivia thought out loud, trusting that Ed would be able to hear her words and at least wait to go nuts.

"You think she is still in some kind of danger?" Ed asked, alarmed.

"Hard to say. My guess is no, because she's been here for a couple of years now. But the way she panicked on me, it's possible that she still feels like she isn't safe." Olivia was torn. She wished should had more time to really talk to Charlie earlier.

"Do you think it's drugs?" Ed asked, just needing to talk this out. He needed something concrete, because he felt out of control.

"What made you go that route?"

"Well, she's a kid who feels lonely. Estranged from her father, mom and stepfather are apparently not really there for her. It would make sense to go off to school and get in with a rougher crowd. Look for ways to escape reality." Tucker explained his theory to her and he could see her thinking along with him.

"I suppose if she got in deep enough, it would explain her move. The university likely didn't want to support her." Liv finished his thought for him.

"But…." Ed began, and then stopped. Again. He couldn't keep going with his next thoughts.

"I know. Don't go there, babe. Ok?" Olivia rubbed at his neck and back, trying to ease the tension. But he abruptly stood up.

"I think I'm just going to go into the office. I'm not going to be able to sleep." Olivia was startled and stood up quickly, grabbing his arms, but he continued. "Maybe I can get a workout in and then be productive on the mass of paperwork I'm sorting through from those dumbass cops in Queens that decided it would be a good idea to smuggle drug money from evidence. The stupidity of humans sometimes astounds me."

"No. Ed…baby…don't go. It's the middle of the night. The paperwork will still be there. Come to bed with me…" She began to kiss at his neck and knead the muscles in his shoulders, hoping to relax him to the point he would stay with her. He let her work him over a bit, before stepping back and holding her at an arm's length.

"Olivia…I love you. I just, I can't concentrate on that right now. I can't get this out of my head. I just need to….I need to blow off steam."

Olivia tried not to let that sting, but it did. She wanted to help him and he wasn't letting her.

"It's ok, Liv. Go back to sleep. I'll stop in the precinct later on and see if we can sneak off for lunch?" He was trying to make this better, because he could see the hurt and worry in her eyes. He never turned down sex with her. Ever. But he just didn't have his whole head in the game, and she didn't deserve that.

"You aren't going to smoke, are you?" She asked, unsure what to make of him leaving in the middle of the night. Her emotions were all over the place. But he let out a chuckle.

"No. A cigarette wouldn't even cut it. I'll hit the weight room, do some cardio, shower off, then go to my office. I promise."

"Okay…call me when you get to your desk? Or if you need me?" Olivia knew she wouldn't be sleeping well at this point, but it looked like Ed was leaving whether she liked it or not.

"I will." He stepped to her and kissed her before engulfing her tightly in his arms. "I love you, Olivia. So much."

"I love you, too. Please be safe." Her words were a bit muffled, as she had buried her face in his neck and took in his scent. But he heard them loud and clear. He reluctantly let go of her, threw on a sweatshirt with his sweatpants, grabbed his bag, and left.

Olivia stood in the living room after he left, her arms wrapped around herself, as she took some deep breaths. It was going to be a rough ride.

* * *

 _ **Thoughts? Suggestions? Guesses as to what comes next? Leave a review!**_


	9. Chapter 9

_**A little nervous about this one. I've been debating on how far to take this and decided to go all in. I've updated the rating to M, just to be safe, though I do not plan on writing anything too explicit. Hang on tight.**_

* * *

"I'm just saying, Paul Rudd as Ant Man is perfect. PER-FECT." Charlie and Ed were arguing over the cast of Captain America: Civil War on their way out of the movie theatre.

After cooling down several weeks ago, Tucker realized that his girlfriend was still right and he just needed to let everything play its course. Since then, he made sure to check in with Charlie every other day, figuring that every day would seem excessive. Eventually, though, it did turn into every day as Charlie started initiating phone calls after work as well. It turned into something they both looked forward to, whether it was arguing over the latest news headline or Ed putting Noah on the phone to tell some kind of corny joke he proudly taught him.

That Saturday, he decided to treat her to a matinee before he had to stuff himself into a suit and attend some ridiculous fundraiser with Olivia. He never understood why, as Captain, his presence was often required at these things, thought at least now he got to drag his insanely hot girlfriend with him. For now, he was just enjoying the banter back and forth with Charlie.

"What do you have against Paul Rudd anyways?"

"He's just goofy looking. Also, that movie Meet the Fockers was stupid. I hate stupid movies." Ed just grumbled, despite the small smile he had at seeing his daughter so animated.

"Daaaaad, that's Ben Stiller. Don't you know anything?" She stood on the sidewalk with her hands on her hips, clearly exasperated with her old man. But all Ed could think in that moment was how grateful he was to have this silly interaction with her.

"Apparently not. They don't let us IAB Captains into the entertainment world too often."

"Clearly. Can I spot you a coffee before you head off to your fundraiser? Now that I got credited for an article, I'm in the big money" Charlie winked at him, obviously not quite ready to end their time together. Ed melted a little at the gesture.

"I'd love that, kiddo."

* * *

"Ok. You're trapped on a desert island and you can only have 3 things with you. What are they?" Charlie had been asking him ridiculous questions for the last half hour, but Ed was having such a good time he barely noticed the exact level of crazy their conversation had reached.

"My gun, so I can kill stuff to eat. A compass. And…a cell phone? Verizon works everywhere." Tucker answered, confidently.

"Why wouldn't you choose a boat, dummy?" Charlie asked while giving him that Tucker smirk.

"Wait, I didn't know that was an option! Isn't that cheating?" Ed protested, pretty sure that wasn't how the game worked. But before they could continue their playful conversation, his phone rang.

"Hey Liv, what's up." Ed eyed Charlie as he listened to a frustrated Olivia explain that Lucy had the flu and she was having trouble finding a last minute babysitter for Noah.

"No, it's okay babe. I understand. Sitters are hard to come by." Ed was trying to be gracious, but he was highly disappointed that he would end up going to this stuffy event alone.

"It's fine, really. It sucks for me, but I know it's not on your fault….no, I don't know how late it will be. I'm likely just going to head home afterwards, then. Let you get some sleep…..ok….it's okay, stop apologizing. Alright, love you too." He hung up the phone and looked towards his daughter.

"Welp, I've been ditched for the night. Liv's babysitter is sick and she can't find anyone else."

Charlie eyed him for a bit, seeing his disappointment and dread about the night out alone.

"I'll keep Noah" she offered, after thinking for a few moments. "It will be fun. That is, if Olivia is okay with it?"

"You don't have to do that. I didn't mean for my whining to come across as a way to get you to babysit." Ed definitely did not want his daughter to feel like she had to be the go-to sitter.

"I don't mind at all. It will be way better than sitting on my couch watching Netflix. Plus, Noah is fun. We can bond. He's probably smart enough to bring a boat on the island." She said that last statement with a smirk, and he just gave her a fake glare.

Ed knew Olivia wouldn't mind at all. She had actually spent a few afternoons with Charlie recently, shopping for a new couch for the young woman's apartment. And each time she returned, it was clear that she had fallen a little more in love with his daughter.

"She's such a good kid, well, young adult. Funny, kind, smart…" Olivia would go on and on to Ed, as if she had to convince him of how amazing his own kid was.

"If you are sure, I'll call her back and tell her to start primping." Charlie nodded her confirmation to Ed as he hit #1 on speed dial.

* * *

Noah and Charlie sat playing with a puzzle, while Ed impatiently waited for Olivia to decide she was ready to go.

"He will likely be ready to go to bed in about an hour," Olivia was rushing around, still putting her earrings in as she thought of all the last minute things to tell Charlie. "If he gives you a hard time, maybe just sit in there with him. He's usually pretty good."

"I'm sure it will be fine, don't worry." Charlie replied.

"Help yourself to any snacks or drinks you find. There's an open bottle of red on the counter, if you want to indulge a bit later."

"Thanks, Liv. I brought my laptop with me to get some work done once little dude's asleep."

Olivia finally stopped and looked at the sight before her. Ed's daughter and her son were happily playing together on the floor. Noah sat in Charlie's lap while they both focused intently on the toddler puzzle in front of them. It was something she never thought she would see, but yet, there it was. And she loved it.

"Okay, kiddos. Be good. Love you both!" Olivia went over and kissed Noah on the head, then moved and kissed Charlie on the head as well. Charlie looked up at her with a grateful smile.

"You two just have fun. We are going to party hard, aren't we Noah?"

"Part-y with Tar-lie!" Noah exclaimed as if he understood what that even meant.

"Behave, you two." Tucker gave his gruff goodbye and the pair disappeared into the hallway.

* * *

It was a little after eleven when Ed and Olivia stumbled out of the elevator and made their way to her apartment door. It had been a good night, and Ed was eager to get his girlfriend out of her dress and into bed.

"Ed," Olivia was breathless and he had her pinned against her door as he sucked at her neck. "Ed. Your daughter is inside, get it together."

He straightened up for a bit, but still had a predatory look in his eyes.

"Once she's safely in a cab, you're mine Benson."

"All yours, Tucker."

They straightened out their clothes and made their way inside the apartment, but paused at the site before them. Charlie was out cold on the sofa, and little Noah was curled up on top of her, both with cookie reminisce all over them.

"Oh my goodness, Ed hand me my phone." Olivia gushed quietly, wanting a picture of the sweet scene in front of her. "Is this not the cutest thing?"

She looked up at Ed and she could see his eyes misting up.

"What is it?"

"Just, look at them Liv. In all my wildest dreams, I never thought that I would be in this moment. Right here."

Olivia leaned up and kissed his cheek. "It's real, sweatheart. We are all right here with you."

"Dad? Liv? You're home?" Charlie muttered from the couch, having a hard time waking up from her slumber.

"I'll lay him down. We can do a bath in the morning." Ed went over and carefully picked the little boy up and cradled him into his chest.

Olivia went over and began to clean up the cookie crumbs.

"Sorry, Olivia. We made a mess. I meant to have it cleaned, but I must have been exhausted." Charlie spoke fast, worried that Olivia was upset to come home to this.

"Don't worry about it. Looks like you two had fun, and I'm so glad. He really loves you." Olivia tried to reassure the girl.

"I better get going…I'm supposed to be at work tomorrow." Charlie began to gather her things up.

"Tomorrow is Sunday.." Tucker said as he came back from laying Noah down. "Why are you working on a Sunday?"

"Last day of regular season play for college baseball and softball. All hands on deck to dig up the good stories." Charlie seemed excited to finally feel like she was getting her hands in the mix, which caused Ed to smile at her.

"That's great, baby. I'm proud of you. Let me call you a cab."

Olivia had gone off to kiss Noah goodnight and rid herself of her heels, while Ed walked Charlie to the door.

"Dad, the train is right here. And it will drop me off a block from my apartment. It's fine."

Olivia came out of her room at that point, washing her face off with a towel.

"Let us get you a cab, sweetie." She said, reaching for her purse. Charlie sighed, but relented much to Ed's relief. Olivia continued with the mom speech. "Call us when you are home and locked up."

"I will." Charlie promised as she hugged Olivia and kissed Ed on the cheek. "Goodnight!"

As soon as the door closed, Ed had Olivia pinned up against it.

"Now, where were we…." He mumbled as he reattached his lips to her neck.

* * *

Charlie was humming softly to herself as she reached her apartment door and turned the lock. The whole cab ride home she kept wondering if this was real life. Her dad was really back in her life. He wanted to be back in her life. And he was introducing her to a family. A family that was accepting her into it. She hadn't felt this safe and loved in a long time and she was finally letting her guard down. Maybe it was time to open up a little more, she thought as she finally got herself inside. As she reached out to turn on the light, she felt something cold pressed up against her throat.

"Hey there, Charlie. Did ya miss me?"

Charlie froze. No way. There's no way he found her. She was in New York, 1,000 miles away. And it had been 2 years since her last encounter. She was just having a flashback and needed to snap out of it.

"HEY! I'm talking to you." The deep, rough voice caused her to jump and whimper a bit, as she realized that he was actually in her apartment. He had actually found her.

"Nooooooo…" She began to hyperventilate and the man kept the knife at her throat with one hand, and the other one crept up her chest and grabbed her breast. "Please….please don't….not again"

* * *

 _ **So, what do you think? Leave me your thoughts...**_


	10. Chapter 10

_**Ready?**_

* * *

Ed was playing with Olivia's hair as they laid in bed, fully sated, but neither one asleep.

"She hasn't called. It's been almost 2 hours. She should have called." Ed was clearly nervous. He wasn't used to this aspect of being a father. He missed out on the teenage years, and numerous nights of her breaking curfew. He was chalking his anxiety up to all of that, but deep down he was still convinced his daughter was in trouble.

"Why don't you text her? And if she doesn't respond in a few minutes, give her a call. She probably got in and fell asleep. The poor thing looked exhausted earlier."

"Maybe…" Ed mumbled as he reached for his phone, put on his glasses, and started to text.

 _Ed: Hey sweetheart are you home?_

He kept the phone on his chest and went back to stroking Olivia's hair, hoping to get a message back from Charlie. But it never came.

"Call her…" Olivia sat up and pulled a t-shirt on, as Ed followed suit and then put the phone to his ear. When it went to voicemail, he shot a worried glance at Liv and called again.

* * *

Charlie was sitting up in bed, with her comforter wrapped around her. Her phone was clutched in her hand as it rang over and over again, but she couldn't bring herself to answer. She glanced over at her clothes that were in pieces and strewn across her bedroom floor and she let out a shuddering breath.

 _How could I let this happen again,_ she just kept thinking it over and over again.

 _Where did he go? He said he'd be back…what do I do? How did he find me?_ She was beginning to panic again. Her roommates were both away for the weekend, so there was no stopping him from coming back.

That's when the phone rang again for the fourth time, and she could finally see the picture ID through her tears. It was a selfie she took of her and her dad at the park earlier that week. He was kissing her cheek and she was smiling. That's when she realized that she needed him, and swiped to answer the call.

"Dad?"

* * *

Ed hit call for the fourth time in a row. At this point, he was out of bed and pulling on sweatpants and Liv was rummaging through her drawer for sleep shorts. Something was wrong. Finally, he heard the other end pick up…but what he heard stopped him dead in his tracks.

"Dad?" The voice on the other end was shaky and terrified.

"Charlie? Are you okay? What's wrong?" Tucker went straight into cop mode out of habit.

"Daddy…." he heard her sob his name out again and his heart broke. What the fuck happened in the last 2 hours?

"Charlie, are you home? Where are you? I'm coming." Ed was trying to get himself dressed and together while on the phone, and failing miserably. Olivia who was now just as panicked as Ed, ran over to grab the phone from him while he finished the task of getting ready.

"Charlie? Baby, it's Liv. Can you tell me what happened?" She worked to make her voice calm, but it was a struggle.

"He….he was here….oh god, he was here." Charlie was close to hyperventilating at this point.

"Who was where, Charlie? Is he gone? Are you at home?" Olivia was now frantic, and now also getting herself dressed and looking for her phone so she could text 911 to her squad and get someone over to Charlie's apartment, stat. She hoped she was wrong, but she was fairly certain what had happened.

Ed was dressed now and took the phone back, while Olivia answered Finn's call and told him what was going on.

"I'm on my way, okay? Hang on, baby, I'm coming." Ed kissed Olivia and ran out of the apartment.

"Hurry…please…"

* * *

Olivia rushed into the emergency room at New York Methodist Hospital about an hour later, with Finn close on her heels. Both Finn and Carisi had made it to her apartment in record time, calling Brooklyn SVU on their way over. But by the time they arrived, Olivia was a wreck and Finn decided it best that he go with her to the hospital and Carisi could hold down the fort with Noah until he woke up and could be taken over to Amanda's sitter. Ed had been keeping Olivia up to date as best he could, and she knew that he had convinced Charlie to go to the hospital and get checked out.

She flashed her badge at the nurses' station, barking "Charlotte Tucker" and taking off in the direction that they pointed. As she rounded the corner, she saw Ed hunched over against the wall, his head in his hands. His head snapped up as soon as she called his name.

"Liv…thank God…." he breathed the words out as he pulled her tightly into his arms, burying his face in her hair.

"I'm here. I'm right here. Where's Charlie? Is she ok?" Olivia was trying to comfort the man she loved, while at the same time push him for information about the young woman who had also taken over her heart. So she pulled back a bit so she could look him in the eyes. "Talk to me…"

"They have her in X-ray right now. She isn't saying much, but Liv…when I got there…her clothes were, they were everywhere…" Ed's voice broke as he buried his face back into her neck. Olivia gripped his shirt tightly, fighting off her own tears. She needed to be strong. She kept her hands on Ed, but pulled away so she could address Finn.

"Can you see who Brooklyn SVU is sending over? If it's Tuzo or Delaney, I don't want them anywhere near her." Olivia spoke with a sternness that Finn hadn't heard from her in years. "I also want their Captain on the phone, speaking to either you or me, ASAP."

"You got it, Liv." He began to walk away to make the calls, but stopped briefly. "We're gonna take care of your daughter, Captain Tucker. You have my word." And with that, Finn was gone and Olivia turned her attention back to the distraught man in front of her.

"Walk me through this, Ed." Olivia spoke to him like she would her detectives, hoping that he would snap into investigator mode and start talking. It worked.

"The precinct police were already there by the time I arrived, but it looks like the bastard somehow got in when another tenant was leaving, and was able to pick the locks and wait for her to get home. Obviously, he took off after he…." his voice tapered off for a second, while he tried to gain some control of his emotions. "She was pretty terrified that he would be back. Also it was pretty clear that she knows him and that she's had problems with him before." Ed finally allowed himself to make eye contact with Olivia after he said that.

"How far do you think this goes back?" Olivia had come up with her own theories, but didn't want to voice them quite yet. Ed was silent for a while and she could tell his mind was racing to try and process what was going on.

"I honestly have no idea, Liv." He finally answered her, almost breathlessly, but then gritted his teeth and let out a near growl. "But I swear to God if I find this bastard..."

His threat was interrupted by the nurse wheeling Charlie towards them, obviously having completed her X-rays. Olivia finally set eyes on the girl, and had to stifle an outward reaction. Her hair was a mess, lip was split, bruises were forming along her jaw, and her eyes were red and swollen from what Olivia could only assume was crying. Ed was seemingly frozen in place, so she made her way to them cautiously, as to not upset the young woman further.

"Hey, Charlie," she began and knelt down next to the wheelchair and reached for her hand, then looked up at the nurse. "Anything broken?"

"No, just some deep bruises that she'll need to be careful around." The nurse answered a little too business-like for Olivia's taste, but she let it go.

"I'll help you get her settled in the exam room." Olivia stated, leaving no room for argument. Charlie would not be on her own at any point during this. Not if Olivia or Ed had anything to say about it. She looked to Ed, who seemed to be on the phone barking orders to some poor soul. He held up his finger, as if to say that he'd be in momentarily. Olivia nodded, and walked with Charlie and the nurse into the exam room.

The nurse went to move the foot rests out of the way, none too gently, causing Charlie's leg to jam upward. She let out a strained but painful cry and Olivia was there gripping her hand immediately, while glaring at the nurse.

"Be careful with her" she barked at the clearly annoyed nurse. "Just, I got it. Never mind." Olivia gently helped Charlie up and got her in bed. She took careful notice as the how she winced once she sat down and pulled the thin sheet up to her chest. Olivia perched herself on the side of the bed, next to Charlie's leg, and took her hand in both of hers.

"How are you feeling?" She asked gently, in the same voice she used to address victims. She shuddered at the thought of Ed's daughter as the recipient of said tone.

"I've been better" Charlie responded weakly, staring at their interlocked hands. "Is my dad still here?"

"He is - do you want me to go get him?"

"No! Please don't leave me..." Charlie finally looked into Liv's eyes, and they portrayed the absolute terror she was feeling. Olivia swallowed the tears she felt bubbling up and reassured the girl.

"I'm right here. I'm not leaving you, okay? You are safe here." Just as the words left her mouth, a loud crash was heard behind her. Charlie jumped, completely startled and frozen with her hands in a defensive stance. Olivia jerked her head around to see what happened and saw that the nurse had dropped a metal tray of medical supplies.

"Do you mind going to get a nurse who is trained in trauma care? I don't appreciate the attitude and bedside manner you are showing our kid." Olivia's tone was not to be messed with, but also not realizing she referred to Charlie as "our kid". The nurse gave her a glare, but followed the command and left the room. As she left, Tucker finally made his way through the door.

"You already kicking nurses out?" He asked Olivia, not surprised to see her inner bulldog surface. Charlie actually smiled a bit.

"She is," she answered weakly. "Apparently you don't mess with Liv."

"Or anyone that I care about." Olivia said while looking Charlie directly in the eyes, hoping to convey the message that she had her back. Ed took a seat on the other side of the bed, sat back, and took a deep breath.

"Okay, Charlie, you need to tell us what's going on."

* * *

 ** _Don't forget to leave your thoughts or ideas! I find them very helpful and motivating._**


	11. Chapter 11

**_You guys are the best! I want you to know that I read each review and take it to heart. I also try to consider any suggestions, as well. I want you all to keep loving my story!_**

* * *

 _"You already kicking nurses out?" He asked Olivia, not surprised to see her inner bulldog surface. Charlie actually smiled a bit._

 _"She is," she answered weakly. "Apparently you don't mess with Liv."_

 _"Or anyone that I care about." Olivia said while looking Charlie directly in the eyes, hoping to convey the message that she had her back. Ed took a seat on the other side of the bed, sat back, and took a deep breath._

 _"Okay, Charlie, you need to tell us what's going on."_

* * *

Ed watched as Charlie quickly looked between him and Olivia over and over again. He was determined to give her time to realize they were there for her, which would hopefully make it easier for her to open up. But it was clear that the girl was a nervous wreck. She still had a death grip on Olivia's hands and her breathing seemed a bit fast, not that Ed could blame her at this point. He watched as his girlfriend spoke softly to her.

"Charlie, we are right here with you. And we aren't going anywhere. You can tell us anything, and we will have your back. I promise you." Olivia had clearly gone into victim coaching mode, but it still was mesmerizing to Ed as he watched the scene unfold. Here he was, feeling the most helpless he had ever felt, and Olivia was just rock solid. He'd never been more grateful to have her by his side.

"I don't know where to begin..." Charlie spoke softly and with a shaky voice.

"How about when this all started, can you tell us that?" Ed asked, trying to soften his voice but knowing it was just naturally gruff. He had refrained from reaching out to grab Charlie's other hand, though he was aching too. For now, he focused on being content sitting right next to her.

"Right before winter break, my sophomore year of college. I had just turned 20 and finals were over, so a bunch of us decided to go out and celebrate downtown. A lot of my friends were already 21, so we went to this popular bar to hear some music. We met up with another group we knew, just not as well. One of the guys with them had been flirting with me for a little while, so he immediately came over to me and..." she stopped mid-sentence, and Ed figured she was about to reveal she had been drinking under-age.

"Hey, we all drank before we were 21. That's not even important to this story right now, okay?" Ed did his best to reassure her and he saw a little relief enter her blue eyes.

"I'm sorry. I knew I shouldn't have been drinking, but I did. I was just so glad finals were over." Charlie was beginning to talk faster and getting more emotional as she spoke. "I only had the one drink, I promise, but after I finished it I started feeling really dizzy. So I decided to step outside for some fresh air, only I was stupid and didn't tell anyone where I was going so no one noticed I wasn't there anymore. I remember two guys trying to help me once I got out, and they told me they would take me home. I was too out of it to protest...and then...and then the next thing I remember…was..."

"Charlie, hey Charlie take deep breaths for me. You're ok. You're safe." Olivia jumped in, noticing the girl was hyperventilating. Meanwhile, Ed was glued to his chair with both hands gripping the arm rests so tight his knuckles were white. This had been going on for three years.

All of a sudden, the door swung open and two nurses followed by two detectives came into the room, clearly unaware that they were interrupting something.

"Okay, Miss Tucker. We need to begin your exam. These nice detectives here will stay with us while I collect evidence, okay?" The one nurse, an over sized lady likely in her 60s, spoke softly to them. She clearly had experience with these kinds of situations and had a much better bedside manner than the previous nurse, who Olivia kicked out. But Charlie still tensed up in panic.

"Can Olivia stay, please" she begged the nurse. "I know what comes next but I dont want to be alone…"

"Charlie, you have every right to have whoever in here that you want," Ed leaned in close to his daughter, and spoke softly to her. "They cannot make Olivia leave, okay? It's okay sweetheart."

"Dad, I'm sorry. Please don't be mad at me. I just…" The tears began to stream down her face, as she fought the damn of emotion that just kept breaking.

"I could never be mad at you. Olivia is going to stay right here with you, and I'm going to sit right outside that door and make sure no one comes in that you don't want here, okay?" Ed stood up, kissed his daughter on the forehead and squeezed Olivia's shoulder as he made his way to the door. But before exiting, he stopped by the two detectives.

"I know you realize who I am. And I know you have figured out that she is my daughter. And you will treat her accordingly, do you understand?" Tucker's tone was quiet but menacing. Both detectives looked him square in the eye and nodded their understanding. Ed was well aware that if they had any misstep, Olivia would crucify them, but he felt better making the threat himself. Feeling confident that they would be on their best behavior, he stepped out into the hallway and closed the door, finally allowing himself to release the breath he had been holding. His goal over the next few hours was to not put a hole in the wall.

* * *

It was pushing 6am and Tucker was still sitting on the bench right outside the exam room door when he heard footsteps approaching. He looked up to see Finn walking towards him with a carrier tray of coffee.

"I figured you might need something stronger than the hospital crap" he said bluntly, as he handed a hot cup to Tucker and sat next to him placing the carrier on the floor.

"Thanks. I really appreciate it," Tucker nodded at Finn, genuinely grateful that the man had thought of him.

"What is the latest?"

"Liv is in there with her, along with two detectives from Brooklyn SVU and the nurse, doing the kit." Tucker spoke with a detached tone to Finn, unable to access his emotions at that point. He needed to stay in control.

"Which detectives did they send?"

"Sgt. Curtis and the other one was Hall. I don't recall her before, must be new."

"Hall? I don't know her either. As long as Liv is in there, she'll be okay man." Finn was pretty bad at comforting other men, especially ones that he still had a bad taste for. But he knew Tucker was hurting and that Liv loved the man for some reason, so he was making it his duty to care.

"Yeah..." Tucker breathed out his response, still staring at the door. "They find anything at her apartment?"

"Got a lot of different prints off of the door and hallway railing. Still combing the apartment and the trash outside for any discarded items..." Tucker noticed Finn stumble a bit at the end, clearly not wanting to upset him.

"You mean condoms? It's okay. Don't sugar coat it. I'm well aware of what that bastard did, and I definitely don't need my feelings spared about it." There was a self-deprecating tone to his voice now. Ed was fairly confident that he would never forgive himself for what was happening with Charlie, so to have people try and spare him pain was maddening. "You get her clothes bagged up and to the lab?

"Yep. Also bagged the bedding. She talking yet?" Finn decided to appease Tucker's request and talk to him like he would a fellow detective.

"A little. Sounds like the bastard has been after her since college. Not sure how many times he's gotten to her at this point. Hopefully she's still talking to Liv…"

Both men looked up as the door opened and the two Brooklyn SVU detectives stepped out, holding what looked like an evidence box. The Sargent walked towards Tucker who was standing up.

"Captain Tucker, they are just finishing up in there. Said you could go on in. We are heading back to the precinct to process this. Lieutenant Benson said she would bring Miss Tucker in with you in a little bit." Tucker just nodded and shook the man's hand, then watched as they walked down the hall and out of sight. Tucker rubbed his hand over his face before turning to Finn.

"Thanks for sitting here."

"No problem. I'm gonna stay put until Liv tells me otherwise."

Tucker just nodded to him and slowly made his way back into the exam room.

* * *

He paused in the doorway, as he observed Liv tenderly helping Charlie zip up the hospital issued hoodie. She was perched on the edge of the bed. Ed could tell she had no color in her face, with the exception of the bruises marring her jaw. And she had the hiccups from the amount of crying the must have done.

"Hi," she said meekly once she noticed him standing there. She instinctively went to pull the hoodie tighter around her body.

"Hey sweetheart. Mind if I come in?" Ed only assumed they had asked for him to return, but all of a sudden he was nervous.

"Yeah, thanks." She responded with a small smile, trying to let her father know she was okay. Liv was still focused on Charlie though, fussing at her hair and rubbing her back. "I guess I have to go talk to those detectives now?"

"I think that would be best, Charlie. Your dad and I will come with you and do whatever you need. We can sit on either side of you while you talk, or one of us can stay, or we can both wait right outside. Okay? You just tell us what to do." Olivia finally released Charlie's hair and tried to meet her eyes and get confirmation that she was ready.

Ed walked over and helped Charlie stand up, putting his arm around her waist to steady her as she walked.

"We've got you." Ed muttered to her as they made their way out of the hospital.

* * *

 _ **Up Next: We finally get the full story from Charlie. Also, how did poor Noah do being watched after by Carisi? :)**_


	12. Chapter 12

_**I tossed around different formats for this chapter and ultimately decided this worked best. I hope you all think so as well. Not all chapters will be as heavy as the last several have been. My goal is to tell this story as best as I can, but also make it fun to read. So hang in there with me...**_

* * *

Ed and Olivia were standing side by side on the other side of the glass, watching as the two detectives from Brooklyn SVU got ready to take Charlie's statement.

"I think I'm going to be sick" Tucker muttered under his breath. Liv reached out and rubbed at his neck.

"Hang in there, babe. Stay strong." She reminded him what was important right now, and that was keeping it together. There would be a time, later, when he could lose it. But that wasn't now. They both turned back to look into the interview room as the detective hit record.

* * *

 _Sgt Curtis: Can you state your name for the record, please?_

 _Charlie: Charlotte Tucker_

 _Sgt Curtis: Great. Can you start by telling me what happened last night?_

 _Charlie: I had just gotten home from babysitting my dad's girlfriend's son._

 _Sgt Curtis: Time?_

 _Charlie: About midnight. The lights in the hallway were dark, but that isn't unusual. Our landlord is slow. Anyways, I had just gotten in and was going back to lock the door when I felt something cold pressed to my neck and a voice that said 'Hey Charlie, did you miss me"_

 _Sgt Curtis: Did you recognize this voice?_

 _Charlie: Yes. I knew who he was right away, but I didn't have much time to react. He drug me back to my bedroom, knocking a lamp over on the way. He still had the knife to my throat. I knew he would kill me if I fought, so I didn't at first._

 _Sgt Curtis: What happened next?_

 _Charlie: He threw me down onto my bed and reached for his pants. That's when I tried to kick him and run away, but he caught me and hit me across the face. I fell facedown on the bed, and he started ripping my clothes…I tried to stop him. I tried to scream. I swear I did. But I couldn't get him to stop…._

* * *

Outside of the room, Ed's face was red and the veins were popping out of his neck. He wasn't sure he could stomach this, but he had to. He felt Olivia reach over and grab his hand.

* * *

 _Sgt Curtis: What happened when he stopped?_

 _Charlie: He hit me again. Told me that I would never be able to run away from him. He would always find me. And that I knew better than to try and report this again._

 _Sgt Curtis: Has he been threatening you?_

 _Charlie: For the last three years, I would get random calls and emails from him. Photos. Small threats. He wanted me to always be afraid of him. And I was. I still am._

 _Sgt Curtis: This wasn't the first time he assaulted you?_

 _Charlie: No sir._

 _Sgt Curtis: How many times has he assaulted you, including last night?_

 _Charlie: Three, sir._

* * *

Tucker felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. The bastard had raped his daughter three times. Three times and no one had stopped him. He could hear Olivia cursing under her breath, and he knew that this was breaking her as well. But he couldn't bare to look away from his little girl, sat in an interview room in hospital scrubs.

* * *

 _Sgt Curtis: When was the first time?_

 _Charlie: My sophomore year of college. I was out with friends and he put something in my drink. I woke up in a bed with him and another guy, restrained._

 _Sgt Curtis: How long did that last?_

 _Charlie: According to the report I filed back then, about 3 hours._

 _Sgt Curtis: So you filed a report? What was done?_

 _Charlie: Nothing. When I identified the one guy, it started getting weird. I was getting threats mailed to me, phone calls. Turns out, he was the son of a board member and an officer in a fraternity. And I was a nobody. The officers said they didn't have enough evidence, and that I'd be better off not pressing charges. I thought it was crazy and refused at first…but then…_

 _Sgt Curtis: Then what?_

 _Charlie: He attacked me again, outside of my dorm in this little secluded walkway. He shoved me against the fence, assaulted me from behind, and kneed me in the back. He told me that if I knew what was good for me, I'd back off. The next day I recanted my statement._

 _Sgt Curtis: Was that the last you heard from him until last night?_

 _Charlie: No. He would randomly follow me around campus, making sure I saw him so I would be scared. I'd get weird voicemails on my dorm phone. I tried to go to the student services at school, but they told me that if I just ignored it, it would stop. No one believed me and no one wanted to mess with this guy. Eventually, I was so freaked out that I transferred to NYU and moved away._

* * *

"This is unbelievable" Tucker said. "How did I not know this was happening? All those fucking people and no one did a damn thing to help her. Nothing." As he said the word nothing, he turned around and punched the wall.

"DAMMIT" he yelled as he clutched his fist.

"ED! What the hell?" Olivia was startled by his sudden outburst. She rushed over to examine his hand. "You're bleeding."

"I'm fine," he responded harshly. "I need to feel this pain right now."

Olivia just stared at him, beginning to understand just the extent of the turmoil he was wallowing in. That is when she realized that he was blaming himself.

"No. This is NOT your fault. It is a lot of people's fault, but it is NOT yours." She looked him dead in the eye and tried to convey her message.

"Olivia, I swear people are going to pay for this."

"Yes, they will." She nodded in agreement, then turned her attention back to the room.

* * *

 _Sgt Curtis: When you say he threatened you, can you tell me what he said exactly?_

 _Charlie: He told me that he would kill me if I breathed another word. He told me he would be back to rape me again. He also said that his dad could have me kicked out of school if I wasn't careful. I believed him. Once I realized who he was, I knew I was in deep trouble. So I just kept my head down. Stopped hanging out with my friends. Didn't go anywhere but class and home._

 _Sgt Curtis: Did you tell anyone else?_

 _Charlie: I told my mom about the threats after the second assault. But she was still mad that I had been out drinking. Said if I hadn't gone to the bar, nothing would have happened. And that I should know that drinking impairs judgement. She didn't believe me that I said no. She just thought I was being dramatic._

 _Sgt Curtis: Was anyone supportive of you when you first reported?_

 _Charlie: No. People just thought I got fucked up and regretted having sex. Once he started threatening me, it was easier to just go along with it._

 _Sgt Curtis: Can you tell me the name of the man who attacked you?_

* * *

Ed and Olivia held their breath as the watched Charlie react to the question. She visibly started to shake. She seemed to be mumbling, but they couldn't make out what she was saying. The detective was trying to keep her as calm as possible, but he needed a name. So her pressed her again.

* * *

 _Sgt Curtis: Charlie, I need you to tell me the name of the man who raped you last night._

 _Charlie: I can't. You don't understand. He will find me again._

 _Sgt Curtis: I promise you, if you give me his name he will never touch you again. I will make sure of that and I know that your dad and Olivia will as well. But I need you to tell me his name. Please._

* * *

Olivia stood with her hands over her mouth as the scene unfolded in front of her. That girl was so terrified she couldn't catch her breath. She put a hand up to the window, in hopes that she could transfer some strength to her.

Ed, also, was frozen as he encouraged Charlie to speak in his mind. But she had other ideas...he watched as Charlie stood up and made a beeline for the door. He reacted swiftly and was there to greet her as she emerged in a panic.

"Hey, hey Charlie. It's ok. You're safe. I'm right here." He was trying to catch her eyes, but she was in such a state that he was unsure if she could even hear him. He finally reached out and took hold of her hands, which did the trick. She registered that he was there and talking to her, and she collapsed against his chest trying to slow her breathing. Ed engulfed the girl in his arms, and let out a deep breath he had been holding for some time. He didn't take fore granted the fact that his daughter was allowing him to comfort her, despite their history.

"I can't do this..." Charlie kept repeating those words as Ed kissed the top of her head.

"I know you can do this. It won't be like before. Everyone here believes you. Everyone here will protect you. And can promise you, that man will never touch you again." Tucker's voice was soft, but still gruff as he assured his daughter that they had her back. "We just need his name..."

Charlie pulled away and looked up at him, tears still streaming down her face and her body shaking. She bit her bottom lip and nodded slowly before turning and going back into the interview room.

Ed went back to stand by Olivia and took her hand, but his eyes never left Charlie as he watched her sit down again.

* * *

 _Sgt Curtis: Ok, Charlie. Can you continue?_

 _Charlie: Yes..._

 _Sgt Curtis: Tell me the name of who attacked you last night..._

 _Charlie: I..._

 _Sgt Curtis: It's okay. He won't hurt you again. Just tell us his name._

 _Charlie: Josh Miller_

 _Sgt Curtis: What did Josh Miller do?_

 _Charlie: He raped me._

* * *

As soon as she got the last words out, she burst into tears and buried her faces in her hands. Her entire body was shaking with sobs. Sgt Curtis gently told her that they could take a break and that her dad was right outside. But Charlie just sat in her chair, violently sobbing. He got up with his other detective and went to open the door. He motioned for Ed and Olivia to come in.

"Take as long as you need. I'm going to run his name through the system and then I'll be back to ask more questions."

Ed gratefully shook the Sargent's hand and gestured for Liv to go in ahead of him. They slowly approached Charlie, and pulled up a chair on either side of her. Ed was reluctant to reach out to her, for fear she would recoil. But then she looked up at him, with his eyes, and they looked broken.

"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do. I'm sorry." A fresh round of tears came flowing from her eyes and Ed, without thinking, just pulled her into his chest again.

"This is not your fault. It's not. I'm right here. I believe you. Liv believes you. We love you." Ed comforted and rocked her back and forth, while Olivia clutched at his hands behind Charlie's back. The trio stayed like that for a while, until Charlie took a deep breath and straightened up a bit.

"God, I'm exhausted. I just need to think about something else. Anything else."

Olivia got a little gleam in her eye.

"Would you like to see a funny picture?" she asked, reaching into her back pocket for her phone and quickly typing in the passcode. "I left poor Noah with one of my younger detectives, hoping to eventually get a sitter. I never found one, so when Noah woke up poor Carisi had no idea what to do. When I finally checked my phone, he had sent me this picture."

Olivia held up her phone and Charlie took it and began to laugh. In it was a tall, lanky looking guy in khakis, a button down shirt, suspenders on, and his hair slicked back. Then Noah next to him, grinning, in khaki shorts, a white t-shirt, mini suspenders and his hair back with gel, looking identical to Carisi. His face was also covered in chocolate.

"I think he nailed the babysitting thing." Charlie joked.

"Well, at least Noah thinks so," Ed retorted.

* * *

 _ **Carisi the babysitter? Probably not. Let me know what you think and what you are hoping for next!**_


	13. Chapter 13

_**Something weird happened when I posted Chapter 12 yesterday. So make sure you go back and read that before continuing on!**_

* * *

"Where is Josh Miller's last known address?" Tucker demanded as he stormed into Sgt Curtis's office without even knocking. After four hours of having to stand there, helpless, as they questioned his daughter on just about everything in her life, he'd had enough. He wanted answers. He wanted progress. And he wanted it now.

"Captain Tucker, you know I can't give you that information" he responded, sympathetic to the man's position but not wanting to give him ammunition to go rogue.

"All due respect, Sergeant, but after everything I've heard out of my daughter's mouth in there I'm not really trusting that this is being taken care of." Tucker wasn't taking any chances. One police department had already let his daughter down, and she was suffering greatly because of it. That would not happen again. Not on his watch.

"Ed," Sgt Curtis took his glasses off, and looked up at the man. "I promise you that my squad is going after this hard right now. They already have leads as to where he may be, and are out there searching high and low for him. But you know, as well as I do, that I cannot disclose any part of the investigation to you. I want this to stick. So I need you to back off."

Tucker stood there, his jaw set and his breathing ragged, as he looked at the man in charge of Brooklyn's SVU Squad. He knew Curtis was a good guy and a good cop. But he didn't trust that this squad was competent enough to handle his daughter's case. As far as he was concerned, the Feds should be involved at this point because it had crossed state lines. Olivia had actually pointed that out to him as they stood outside the interview room listening to the excruciating details Charlie was revealing. Details so excruciating that Olivia, a seasoned SVU detective, had to excuse herself for about half an hour. Though, Tucker assumed it was because she may have been associating some aspects back to Lewis. He'd need to check in with her later, but knew she wouldn't talk now. They both were keeping Charlie the focus, no matter the cost to them. And he realized that the Sergeant was doing so as well, so he obliged his request to back off.

"Apologies, Sergeant. I'm just a little out of my mind here," Tucker offered the apology quietly, unintentionally giving away the emotion in his voice which the Curtis took note of.

"You know, I've been doing this for about ten years, and it never gets easier to hear some of these stories. Or look their parents in the eye," Curtis said that pointedly, while observing Tucker's expression. The man looked exhausted, both physically and emotionally. "Your daughter has been through hell. But she will be okay. Make sure you are taking care of yourself, too, Ed."

Tucker nodded, and turned to go. But stopped for one last thought.

"Nail this bastard."

* * *

After getting a bit of fresh air, Tucker returned to the little area outside the interview room where his girlfriend was still observing the detectives question Charlie. Her posture looked slumped, her head leaning against the window, and her hands tightly clinched together under her chin. She turned to look at him as he approached her.

"I don't know how much more of this she can take," Olivia stated quietly. "I want to pull her out of there so badly, but I know I shouldn't. It's just….this is too much. Look at her." Her voice cracked towards the end and Ed immediately wrapped his arms around her from behind, placing his head on her shoulder to observe Charlie.

"Thank God for you…" he said after a few minutes, his voice hoarse, as he kissed her neck and took in her scent. He needed her in that moment. "I love you."

Olivia turned her head to look at him, and rested her forehead on his chin.

"I love you too," she whispered. "Can we just take Charlie and go home?"

Ed kissed her forehead and turned to look at the scene in front of him. Charlie was completely slumped over, her head on the table and her arms covering her head. With shoulders constantly shaking, Ed could tell that she was crying again. But it was when he heard her strangled cry that he lost it.

"Please, stop asking me this…." her voice was completely broken. It was in that moment that he released Liv and barged into the interview room.

"Okay, she's done for today. If you have more questions, you can talk to her later. But I'm taking her home." He barked the orders, which startled Charlie and she turned to look at him, still silently crying. "Let's go, baby." He walked over to help her up, grabbed her bag, and left with little protest from the detectives. As soon as they walked out the door, Olivia was there and wrapping Charlie up in her arms.

"It's okay. You're okay. We are taking you with us. No more questions," she was on repeat, as the girl just clung to her as if she was falling off the edge of a cliff. Ed watched for a bit, but then guided them towards the door.

"You have my number if you need anything," he nodded at the Sergeant as they left the precinct.

* * *

The couple quickly decided they should just head to Olivia's apartment, hoping that Charlie would be able to lay down and sleep some. If nothing else, little Noah could offer a refreshing distraction for all three of them. As soon as they walked in the door, Olivia lead Charlie to her bedroom, got her some clothes, and helped her run a shower while Ed relieved Carisi from childcare. With Charlie safely scrubbing everything away, Olivia returned to the living room to see Noah sitting on Ed's lap with some juice, both watching Sesame Street. She went and sat down next to them, making sure their bodies were touching.

"Mama…" Noah tiredly reached out for her so she transferred to tot to her lap and cuddled him close. He was likely confused after waking up to Sonny. Ed continued to just sit, frozen in place, staring at the puppets on the television. Neither one of them knew what to say at that point. So they just sat together in silent support.

"Tar-lie sad?" Leave it Noah to break the silence. He was an observant child, and knew that his friend was not herself when they came in.

"Yeah, baby, Charlie's sad. She may need some hugs when she gets out of the shower." Olivia spoke softly to him, kissing at his cheek.

"She have boo-boos. I make them better." Noah looked up at Olivia as he said that and it brought tears to her eyes.

"My sweet baby boy…." she gushed, trying not to release the cries she had pent up. "You make everything better. Just everything."

"Cap-in, you sad too? I make it better." He said, taking his job seriously, and returning to Ed's lap. He took his little hands and smacked them onto Tucker's face, then kissed his nose. That's when the tears finally started falling down his face.

"No cry, Cap-in. It otay," Noah said softly and cuddled up to him.

Watching her son and Ed only proved to finally cause Olivia's tears to fall as well. But she hid them quickly by standing up.

"I'm going to check on Charlie."

As she got into her bedroom, she saw that Charlie was just stepping out of the bathroom in the sweats she found for her to wear. The bruises on her face were glaringly evident, as was the exhaustion in her eyes.

"Do you mind if I just lay down for a while in here?"

"Sure, sweetie. Did you take the sedative that the doctor gave you?" Olivia wanted the young girl to rest, and she was pretty sure it would take the drug to do so.

"Yeah, after my shower. Hopefully it knocks me out…" she spoke softly, her voice still full of tears and strained from all the talking and crying earlier.

"Do you want someone to stay in here with you? Noah has self-appointed himself to make you better, and he's pretty good at it." Olivia smiled as she spoke the words, seeing that the mention of Noah made Charlie's face light up just a tiny bit.

"Sure."

Olivia called for Noah and he came barging in, ready to fix whatever was broken. He immediately climbed up next to Charlie, who was situated on the bed, propped against pillows, and carefully situated himself against her.

"Tar-lie, I here now. It otay. I here. Mommy here. Cap-in here. You here. All here. Don't be sad." Noah spoke the words, not realizing the impact they made on the three adults in the room with him. Charlie let out a soft sob and hugged the little boy to her.

"Thank you Noah," she softly cried as she spoke. "I don't want to be alone…."

"Never again," replied Ed from the doorway. "Never again."

* * *

 _ **My plan is to jump ahead in time for the next chapter, but if you would prefer something else, let me know. More Charlie? Less Charlie? More light-hearted? More heavier conversation? I'm willing to consider your suggestions. Either way, leave a review :) They are super motivating! 3**_


	14. Chapter 14

_**Author's Note: Unfortunately after my last chapter, someone anonymously posted a series of very harsh and hateful comments. Luckily, I moderate guest reviews before they post and I was able to delete them. But if you don't like this story or you don't think it is "believable", then don't read it. There is no reason to hide behind anonymity to say hateful things to those of us just telling a story. You have no idea what an author has been through or why they are choosing to write the story that they do. Personal attacks are not welcome here and no one is forcing you to read any story on this site. Be kind or go elsewhere.**_

 _ **For everyone else: your encouragement, ideas and constructive thoughts mean a lot to me and help motivate my writing. So thank you, from the bottom of my little fanfic heart. I am sorry if this next chapter was in any way effected by my being upset at nasty comments.**_

 _ **Now, back to the story...**_

* * *

Olivia gasped and shot straight up in the bed, terrified. The room was dark but she quickly realized she had been dreaming and slowly started to calm herself down. As she kicked the sheet off of her, Ed mumbled a little bit and rolled towards her.

"Liv? Olivia? Where'd you go?" His hand had reached out for her, only to hit empty mattress.

"Here," she said breathlessly, still trying to get her heart rate back down. Ed was alarmed at the tone in her response and moved to turn on the bedside lamp and sit up next to her.

"What happened?" Ed asked, as he cautiously rubbed her back with his right hand and rubbed his eyes awake with the other.

"Nothing, I'm fine. Just startled." Her voice was still breathless, so obviously Ed didn't believe a word of what she said.

"Nice try, Liv. Want another stab at that answer?" It may be 3am, but Tucker was still perfectly in tune with his girlfriend. He also knew that the last month had been difficult for her on multiple levels. Obviously, there was the reality of what had happened to Charlie and how that was effecting their lives, but he had been concerned that details she had disclosed would send Olivia back to the Lewis incident. He had been waiting for a good time to bring it up, but always chickened out when he found a moment. He and Liv had talked very little, face to face, about William Lewis and what he had done to her. Granted, Ed knew a good amount already from the police reports and the trial, but he knew Olivia well enough to know that details had been left out. And that those details were likely worse than what he already knew. Regardless, given what he was already aware of, there were some similarities to Charlie's ordeal that he knew bothered Liv more than she let on.

Olivia took a deep, shuddering breath but didn't say anything in response to Ed's comment. Instead she just leaned towards him and he took that opportunity to scoot closer and wrap his arms around her. As soon as her head hit his chest, she began to sob. Harsh, shaky sobs that pierced through the heart of Ed Tucker. He didn't say anything, but he would occasionally move his hand up to stroke at her face and hair so she knew he was still there and loving her. They stayed like this for about twenty minutes, just content to be in each other's arms, until Olivia finally calmed down and looked up at Ed.

"Sorry," she said softly.

"For what?" Ed asked, stroking her tear stained cheek. Olivia just smiled at his response and leaned up to kiss him gently on the lips.

"You're amazing, do you know that," she responded instead of answering his question. Ed stared into her eyes for the longest time, trying to decide if he wanted to push this conversation now. He decided it was as good of a time as any.

"Olivia, tell me what woke you up in such a panicked state." His voice was soft, sleep-filled, but firm as he requested his girlfriend to open up more. He knew deep down that this conversation would hurt him, but he had to know. He was feeling like he couldn't properly be there for her while left in the dark. Her eyes shot down to look at their intertwined hands, and he could tell that she was trying to figure out what to say.

"Baby, please just talk to me," Ed begged. She finally looked back up at him.

"I had a nightmare about William Lewis."

Tucker released the breath he had been holding since he awoke to her cries and squeezed her hands, urging her to continue.

"Only this time, it wasn't Amelia I was going to save. It was Charlie. You don't want to hear the rest..." Her voice trailed off towards the end, but she still looked him in the eyes as she spoke.

"Maybe I don't, but I do want to hear what has been going on in your head over the last month that is bringing the Lewis nightmares back." She took her hands him his and ran them through her hair and over her face, clearly not knowing where to go at this point. He had her cornered and she knew it was time to talk. She sighed and moved to get up from the bed.

"No, Liv, don't leave. Talk to me. Please." Ed was quickly standing up and pleading with his girlfriend. She stopped and looked at him.

"I'm not leaving. I need to pee and splash some water on my face. Then we'll talk." Ed, relieved, kissed her forehead and watched as she went to freshen up. He straightened the bed back up, making sure the pillows were fluffy, then went to grab a couple bottles of water in case they were needed. On his way back in, he peeked on Noah, who was sprawled out on his toddler bed, thumb in his mouth. The kid was out cold.

When he returned, Olivia had already crawled back into bed and was sitting up against the pillows. She smiled at him as he approached her.

"Checking on Noah?" Ed just smiled, and nodded.

"I wish I could sleep as heavy as he does," Ed thought out loud as he joined her in the bed. He put his arm around her, drawing her into his side and kissed her temple. "You know you can tell me anything. Anything, Olivia. And I'm not going to love you any less. I'll only love you more."

"Brian said the same thing," she mumbled, unable to help herself fight the fear of abandonment that plagued her.

"I'm not him. I'm not going to request more work hours and undercover operations to avoid you. In fact, I'm the boss. So I'm going to give that stuff to other people, so I can spend more time with you." Ed responded, with his attempt at comforting her into the realization that he would be by her side for as long as she'd let him be.

"How can you be so sure?" She asked, looking up at him and taking his free hand in hers to play with his fingers.

"Because I am so deeply in love with you. And I already know a lot of what happened, and it has only made me fall that much more in love with you. And I will tell you this as much as you need me to. Because it's the truth." Ed spoke passionately to her, trying to reach deep into her soul. And it worked, because her eyes teared up again with relief as she touched her nose to his, just wanting to be close to him. She stayed like that, gathering his strength then pulled back and started to talk.

* * *

Almost two hours later, Olivia had fallen back to sleep tightly wrapped up in Ed's arms, but he was wide awake. The two women he loved most in the world had both been viciously assaulted, multiple times. Anger was no longer an appropriate emotion for him. How could the world be this cruel? How could crimes as horrific as sexual assault be so prevalent? And why was he powerless to stop it? So many of the phrases Olivia said kept running through his mind.

 _"I was restrained, helpless as he touched me."_

 _"He took his time for parts of it, enjoying the fact that he was torturing me."_

 _"I learned that he wanted me to fight. It turned him on. But it was so hard for me not to."_

 _"He assaulted me with his hands when he took me to the restroom. I asked him to take me. I didn't have a choice. Maybe it would've been better to just have an accident."_

 _"I lived in constant fear that when I came home, he would be there. Part of me still does, even though he is dead."_

 _"I can't stop thinking about Charlie and how she did this all alone for 3 years. Having no one believe her. No one to protect her."_

 _"I keep having this same nightmare - and Lewis rapes both of us."_

He laid there, clutching Olivia to his body, and finally released a few of the tears he had been holding in for the last month. Their little family was in so much turmoil and all he could do was watch. Josh Miller was still out there somewhere, though at least the Feds were finally involved. Olivia was having this recurring nightmare. Charlie was terrified to go back to her apartment, so she was staying at Ed's place while he primarily stayed with Olivia. He was still fighting hard to gain his daughter's trust. It was one step forward and two steps back, it seemed, for each of them. And Ed spent the rest of the night thinking about how he was going to fix all of this.

* * *

 _"_ Mornin' mommy!" Noah cheerfully greeted Olivia as she made her way to the coffee pot. He was sat in his highchair attempting to eat cereal from a bowl, but in reality, he was essentially pouring milk down his little belly. Tucker was smart enough to have him just eat in his pull-up, but it was still a mess.

"Hi sweet boy. Did you sleep well?" Noah nodded enthusiastically, then returned to the task at hand. Ed rose from the table to come into the kitchen and kiss Olivia good morning.

"How are you feeling?" He asked as he settled his hands on the small of her back, holding her bottom half to him as she sipped her coffee.

"Better. Thank you, you know, for last night. And for just...well, loving me." She spoke quietly, but he knew she meant those words.

"Always, Olivia. Always." They stayed in each others arms, sipping coffee from the same mug, and watching Noah attempt to lick the milk from his belly. Things were not okay just yet with their little family. But it would be eventually, because they were together.

* * *

 ** _Up Next: Some fluff and stuff._**


	15. Chapter 15

_**You are all amazing. Keep the ideas coming!**_

* * *

Olivia sat on a bench watching Noah cautiously explore the little splash zone they discovered last week while searching for a bathroom in Central Park. It seemed like the perfect place to be on a hot summer day, except that today it was a tad cool. She had put Noah in his swim shorts and matching swim shirt, but she was still concerned that he would get cold. Olivia, herself, had opted for flip flops to accompany her leggings and t-shirt, in case she had to go in after him. But so far she had been saved of that feat given that Noah was still hanging out on the outskirts of the real action. It was so amazing, she thought, to watch him explore new life experiences. He was a careful but curious child. It often took him a while to warm up to a new idea, but once he did he experienced it with a joy that was unparalleled in Olivia's eyes. They were supposed to be meeting Ed and Charlie here for a little picnic a little later, but Noah had been stir crazy in the apartment so Olivia packed up and headed out early. As much as she loved being with Ed, she still cherished these moments with just her and Noah. He was growing up fast.

A little shriek followed by some giggles brought her out of her thoughts and she looked over to see that Noah had finally stepped into one of the splash zones. It had surprised him at first, but she knew that was all he needed to get over the initial hurdle. He continued his giggles and shrieks as he hopped in and out of the one area, waving to her each time he escaped the water stream. Olivia would wave back and cheer him on, much to his delight. She had picked up her phone to take some pictures when she noticed she had missed a text from Ed.

 _Picking up deli sandwiches and heading over. Any requests?_

He had sent it about 20 minutes ago, so she was likely too late, but sent a response anyway.

 _Turkey and cheese for Noah. Chicken salad for me. And will you get me an iced coffee?_

Ed responded almost immediately, as he had likely been waiting for her response.

 _You got it. See you in 10._

Olivia just responded by sending him a quick photo of Noah already in the water, confirming that they were there and waiting for him, then put her phone away and sat back to continue watching her son. It wasn't five minutes later when she saw Charlie making her way towards the splash pad. She hadn't spotted her or Noah yet, so Olivia stood up hoping she would see her quickly. She took note of Charlie's anxious movements as she approached, then saw the brief relief in her posture once she noticed Olivia waving at her.

"Hi, Olivia." Charlie greeted her warmly, but quietly.

"Hey there," Olivia returned the greeting and cleared her bag off the bench so they could both sit down. "Your dad should be here soon, he was just at the deli."

Charlie let out a small laugh. "Yeah, he called me twice while he was there. He seemed really worried about getting something I liked."

Olivia knew this about Ed at the moment. He was feeling a lot of pressure to not screw up around his daughter. Charlie hadn't put any real pressure on him, but his personality was so that he thought he could make up for the lost time by making life perfect now. Olivia tried to tell him that wasn't a healthy way to go about this, but the man was stubborn. She also knew he was feeling incredibly helpless as the Feds worked to find Josh and came up empty. Charlie was increasingly nervous to be out and about, and had yet to return to her apartment in Brooklyn. So Ed's answer to all of this was to constantly try and make sure everything else was perfect. And it was driving both of them nuts.

"Is he still driving you crazy?" Olivia asked, knowing the answer, but hoping she would talk to her.

"Sometimes," Charlie thought out loud. "It's better than being alone, though."

Olivia hummed in agreement and turned to look at Noah, who was now on to the next, slightly larger, splash area. She chuckled as the stream knocked him backwards a bit and he had this look of surprise on his face. Then the look changed to determination and he went back in to conquer the spray.

"He's so cute." Charlie mused. "And determined."

"Yeah, it took him a while to warm up once we got here. But now there's no stopping him." Olivia spoke, smiling, as her eyes stayed on her son.

"Do you two spend most weekends with my dad?" Charlie asked, clearly wondering how serious all of this was between them. She knew that Olivia had been right there when she was attacked again, but part of her figured it was because of her line of work. Now that the initial shock had worn off, she felt a little uncomfortable when all four of them were together. Olivia had noticed the change last weekend at dinner, but brushed it off. She was getting ready to respond when Ed arrived.

"Hey, sorry. The deli was extra slow today," he exclaimed quickly and deposited a drink tray with 3 iced coffees and a juice onto the bench then leaned down to kiss Olivia. Charlie just busied herself fixing up everyone's coffee and putting straws in.

"Where's little man?" Tucker asked as he began to look around.

"He just over there by the spitting frog," Olivia pointed him out and waved when Noah noticed her. He quickly waved back, but then got back down to the task of filling his bucket with water and dumping it on his head.

"Should we set up the picnic here on the bench, or try to get him over on the grass?" Tucker asked, unsure if he should start unpacking or just hang out.

"I think we can move to the grass soon. We got here early, so he's had about 30 minutes in the water. I don't want him to get too cold." Olivia responded, getting ready to bribe her son into leaving the splash pad for lunch. "Why don't you and Charlie go grab a spot, and I'll work on Noah."

Ed just nodded and turned to his daughter as she gathered her bag and the drink tray.

"Sun or shade?" He asked.

"Maybe sun, it will help Noah dry off. There's that spot over by the tree so we can move to the shade if we want to, later."

"Sounds good," Ed threw his backpack on, grabbed the food bag, and used his other hand to pull Charlie in for a half hug and kiss on the head.

* * *

An hour later, Charlie was making huge bubbles with a bubble wand she bought from a vendor and Noah was running in circles trying to pop every single one. At one point, he had run straight into a bubble causing it to pop all over his face. He just giggled.

"Tar-lie, bubble on my face! Help!" He said through his giggles, and Charlie knelt down to wipe the soap substance off with her t-shirt. "Tanks, Tar-lie. Again! Again!"

Ed and Olivia were sitting nearby, under a tree, watching the scene in front of them. Charlie and Noah were now working to make a "Noah sized bubble" with the wand. Each time the bubble would get a bit bigger and Noah would cheer loudly, before barreling into it and laughing hysterically. His laughter was contagious, as the three adults would join in his glee each time as well. That was when Ed first noticed a man sitting on a nearby bench, watching them play. It wasn't unusual for strangers to be in Central Park, observing others as they went about their day. But it still made Tucker uncomfortable.

"Liv, 3:00, guy on the bench." He said out of the side of his mouth as to not have the kids hear him.

"Yeah, what about him?"

"He's been watching us for a while now…." As Ed said that, Olivia began to look more closely at him. He had a baseball cap and Ray Bands on, so you couldn't exactly see his face. All of a sudden a yell came from the splash pad, causing Charlie to look up in that direction. Her eyes never made it to the commotion, as they settled on the figure Ed and Olivia were just observing and she froze. The man just continued to sit on the bench and look at Charlie, unmoving.

"Tar-lie, more bubbles," Noah tugged on her hand, annoyed that she had stopped meeting all of his requests for fun play. Charlie startled and looked down at the boy.

"Let's go show mommy, ok?" She said, her voice shaky, but scooped the boy up and went over to the blanket. Ed had already noticed her frozen stare and was getting up as they approached. Noah immediately plopped onto Olivia's lap to explain the large bubbles they made.

"What is it?" Ed asked, his voice low.

"Nothing, I just…" Charlie's voice tailed off as she turned towards the man on the bench again. He was now walking away from them, so she couldn't get another look at his face.

"Charlie, did you recognize that man on the bench?" Tucker asked, going into detective mode but inside his heart was beginning to race.

"I….I thought so…" Charlie began. "But, I'm probably just a crazy person."

"You are not crazy. If you think you recognize him, we need to call it in." Ed began to reach for his phone.

"And say what, I think I saw someone in the park but can't tell?" Charlie asked, beginning to feel a bit dizzy at all that was happening.

"Yes. That's exactly what we say." Ed said a bit too forcefully, causing Olivia to stand up with Noah and grab onto his arm.

"Charlie, do you think that could have been Josh?" Olivia asked softly, noting that the girl's breathing sped up as soon as she said his name.

"I….I thought so…." Charlie whispered, and that was all Ed Tucker needed to start dialing. Olivia moved to take the girl's hand and lead her to sit with her and Noah on the blanket while Ed made his call.

"I believe you Charlie. And so does your dad. And maybe that wasn't him, but we should look into it, ok?"

"Can we get out of here?" Charlie asked, her eyes darting around and suddenly feeling very exposed. Ed joined them at that question.

"Yes, I'm going to take you three back to Olivia's then come back to meet the officers. If they have any questions for you, then they can come talk to you afterwards." Ed had already decided the plan, and Charlie was happy to oblige.

* * *

Later that night, Ed walked the officers to the door of Olivia's apartment. They had arrived around 6pm to ask Charlie a few questions, but that had turned into an hour of them pushing her to try and remember details of the man in the park. She had eventually gotten so frustrated she began to cry, and so Ed had swiftly ended the interview.

"Captain Tucker, until we figure out if Josh Miller is still in the city, Charlie shouldn't be alone." The officer met Ed's eyes as he spoke the words and shook his hand.

"You really think that was him?" Ed asked, grasping for anything to make himself feel better. But it didn't work.

"I'm willing to bet it was." And with that, they were gone. Ed leaned his head against the door to try and gather himself before going back in to his family. But Charlie approached him first, her arms wrapped around herself.

"They think it was him, don't they? He's stalking me again." Her voice was void of emotion.

Ed turned around to look at her. He reached out and pulled her into his chest, holding her tightly.

"It's possible he is watching you," he begrudgingly told her. "But I'm not letting you out of my sight. You're safe here."

Olivia, attempting to lighten the mood, clapped her hands together.

"Okay, who wants a sleepover tonight? We've got movies, popcorn, and games!" She exclaimed, trying to make everyone's fear settle down for a bit. Noah was totally on board with this idea.

"Yea! Sleepover! Tar-lie too! We make a FORT, Tar-lie!" He ran over to his friend, grabbed her hand, and pulled her towards his room to start collecting blankets for the fort. Charlie smiled and followed him, glad for the break from heavy conversation with her dad.

Once they departed, Olivia approached Ed and kissed him, lightly at first, but then deepened it. When she finally pulled away, needing air, Ed rested his forehead against hers. He still needed that connection with her.

"You are amazing, you know that?" He asked as he played with her hair with one hand and the other settled on her lower back, holding her to him.

"So I've been told," she replied with a smirk. "But you are pretty amazing yourself."

The little pitter-patter of footsteps pulled them apart, and they looked to see Noah running towards the couch, with Charlie close behind and loaded up with blankets for their fort.

"We watch Pan!" Noah exclaimed happily. "You like Pan, Tar-lie?"

"I do! Tinkerbell is my favorite."

"Yea! Otay, first we build fort. Then we watch Pan. Come on, mommy. Come on, Cap-in. You help build." Noah suddenly took charge of the sleepover plans, and none of the adults argued.

* * *

It was a little after 10pm, and Ed Tucker was still awake and taking in the sight before him. Noah and Charlie were passed out on the floor, under a make-shift fort they made, and an empty bowl of popcorn between them. Olivia had succumbed to slumber on the couch, her head resting on Ed's leg as he sat with his feet on the coffee table. He knew he should wake everyone and get them into their respective sleeping areas, but he didn't have the heart to just yet. That was until his phone rang, blaring through the apartment and everyone began to stir.

"Tucker" he answered.

 _"Captain, we've got Josh Miller."_

* * *

 ** _What do you think, should Ed get a moment alone with Josh? Are the four of them ever going to settle into being a family? Let me know your thoughts in a review :)_**


	16. Chapter 16

_**The saga continues...**_

* * *

Captain Ed Tucker was pacing nervously in the family waiting room at the 20th Precinct in Manhattan. He was not used to being on this side of the glass when it came to investigations and it was driving him crazy. After he received the call that the Feds had apprehended Josh Miller, he had woken Olivia and Charlie to break the news. Olivia got a look of relief on her face, but Charlie just stared at him with an empty look.

"Are they sure?" She asked, clearly not ready to let her guard down in any way.

"Pretty sure," Ed responded. "They need you to come down and pick him out of a lineup so they can begin their interrogation."

Charlie, still sitting on the floor under the make-shift fort, sucked in a deep breath.

"A lineup. Like, I have to look at him with police around me?" She asked, her voice beginning to shake. She was no stranger to this routine, however it was when she finally identified her assailant the first time, three years ago, when things went horribly wrong. She was not about to go down this road again. But as she looked at Ed and Olivia, she realized there wasn't a good way out of it. Olivia checked the time quickly, and realizing it was still before 11pm, decided to make a call to Lucy.

"Let me see if I can get someone to watch Noah," she said, excusing herself into her room to make the call. As she made her exit, Noah began to stir on the floor next to Charlie. Charlie looked over and scooped him into her lap.

"Tar-lie, movie over?" He said in a soft, sleepy voice.

"Yep. We both fell asleep. Maybe we can try to watch it again tomorrow," she tried to reassure him, hoping he wouldn't be upset at the sudden end to his sleepover.

"Otay. You stay all day tomorrow. We play," he demanded, clearly not too out of it to make his plans known. Charlie just laughed and gave him a playful rub, nose to nose.

"You got it, bud. How about I go hang out in your room while you fall asleep?" Charlie offered, basically wanting to get out from under the watch of her father, who was seemingly tense and brooding about the looming lineup. Noah just patted her on the cheek in agreement to the plan, so she stood up with him curled up against her and walked towards the back of the apartment, completely avoiding eye contact with Ed.

As he continued to pace the floor at the Upper West Side precinct, he kept flashing back to the conversation he heard Noah and Charlie have as she sat with him in his room.

 _"_ _Tar-lie, Cap-in is you daddy?" Noah innocently looked up at her, trying to figure out how all of this worked._

 _"_ _Yes, he is. Just like Olivia is your mommy," she stated, hoping to draw some easy comparisons for the young tot._

 _"_ _But my mommy not you mommy?" Noah asked, seemingly still confused._

 _"_ _No, she's just your mommy."_

 _"_ _And Cap-in is you daddy, but not my daddy," he continued his observations. "He a good daddy though."_

 _"_ _He definitely loves you, Noah," Charlie responded, not quite ready to give the man compliments, but realizing that Noah thought the world of him._

 _"_ _Where you mommy?" The questions seemed to be endless, but understandably so seeing as Charlie was confused by all of this herself._

 _"_ _She's in Florida. Far away." Charlie noticed that this answer did not sit well with Noah._

 _"_ _Why you mommy far away?" Noah reached out to touch her hand when he asked. He was an affectionate and sensitive little boy and had no idea the effect he was having on the young woman next to him._

 _"_ _Sometimes Mommies aren't good at being mommies. But you don't have to worry about that, because you have the best Mommy in the world." Charlie spoke straight into little Noah's soul. He already knew he had the best Mommy._

 _"_ _I share my Mommy with you Tar-lie, if you need one," Noah yawned as he said his last little piece, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. "Just like you share you Daddy with me when I need one." Then his little eyes closed and he was off the dreamland. Charlie sat there for a while, watching the little boy sleep and fighting off her tears, completely unaware that Ed and Olivia had overheard the entire conversation._

He was still waiting for Olivia to return with coffee, while he kept thinking back to how Charlie was after she came out of Noah's room. She didn't make eye contact with either of the adults, and didn't seem to accept any of their touches and assurances. It was like she threw her walls back up in record time and Ed couldn't figure out why. But this was the last thing he wanted to be worried about, as he waited for her to return from picking that bastard out of a lineup.

Just then the door swung open, and in walked the captain of the 2-0.

"Captain Tucker, the lineup is done. Charlie is talking with the prosecutor for a bit. If you want to come to my office, you can watch some of the interrogation. Just, keep your head." The Captain was nice to offer, but he was clearly all business. Ed graciously accepted, just needing to feel like he was involved somehow. But once he got situated, he began to wonder if this was a mistake.

"Smug son-of-a-bitch," the Captain muttered to Ed as he turned the volume up. Ed took note of this Josh Miller character. He was sitting straight up with a permanent smirk on his face. Hair slicked back, nicely dressed. And occasionally speaking to his lawyer out of the side of his mouth after the detectives asked a question. They had clearly tuned in right in the middle.

"Mr. Miller you are aware the charges against you are serious. I would suggest you begin to answer our questions."

"Why? She'll just recant her statement again. You can bet on it," he stated as his lawyer formed a smirk. After observing the look on the man's face, along with his lawyer, Ed turned to look at the other Captain.

"What are the chances this runs deeper than just his sick obsession with my daughter?" Ed asked, almost afraid of the answer.

"I wouldn't be surprised at this point…I'd keep my eye on her."

With that, Tucker left the office not wanting to hear anything else and wanting to find Charlie. Instead, he ran right into Olivia, almost spilling the coffee she had gone to grab them.

"Whoa, babe, careful there," she said with a little laugh and handed him his cup of hot goodness. "What's the latest?"

"She picked him out of the lineup, now she's answering a few more questions. I watched about 30 seconds of the interrogation of the prick before realizing it was bad for my blood pressure." Ed spoke while rubbing his hand over his head, trying to work off some nervous energy. "I was just going to look for Charlie when I ran into you."

Olivia looked at him for a while, before asking her next question.

"What happened that has you more worked up than before?" She heard Ed sigh as he struggled to figure out how to answer without sound like a paranoid father.

"I just have a bad feeling that's all. Can we get Charlie and go home?" He stated, not entirely avoiding the question but not wanting to go there at the moment.

"Sure. Why don't you take a bit to calm down and I'll go find her. She doesn't need to see you this worked up." Olivia stated and had gone off to look for Charlie before Ed could argue.

* * *

Olivia eventually found her, alone, leaning up against the wall outside of the room she was just in with the prosecutor. She approached slowly, not wanting to startle her. But Charlie sensed she was there.

"Dad send you to find me?" She asked, her voice void of any emotion at this point.

"No, I sent myself," Liv responded. "Told your dad to take a break and give you some space."

Charlie looked up at Olivia at that point and Liv could see the utter exhaustion on her face, as well as the fear.

"Come on, I got you some coffee…" Olivia put her arm around the girl and led her towards the little family room where Ed was waiting along with their drinks. As soon as they walked in, he was up and coming towards them.

"Are you okay?" He asked gruffly before trying to hug her, but Charlie pulled back with her hands up in a defensive stance.

"I'm fine." She responded, still not looking him in the eyes. If she had, she would have seen the confusion with her sudden evasiveness. He took a few breaths, unsure what to do from there. Luckily, Olivia saved the moment.

"Why don't we head back to my place? I'll make up the couch for you. Or we can kick your dad to the couch and take the bed for ourselves," she said with a little wink. Charlie still didn't show any emotion to the conversation.

"I think I'd rather go home…." her voice was quiet, but clear. Ed and Olivia looked at each other, a little shocked at the revelation, considering she hadn't spent more than 3 nights at her apartment since the latest attack.

"I'm not so sure that is a good idea," Ed responded, not sure he wanted to share with Charlie what they were afraid of.

"Why?" She asked, finally looking up at the two adults in front of her. That was when she noticed their expressions. "They think I'm still in some kind of danger, don't they?"

"We just don't want to take any chances, sweetheart." Ed said softly.

"Don't call me that," Charlie responded, still speaking quietly but with some bite to her tone. Ed was startled at the comment.

"Sorry, I just…we just want you to know that we are here. And that you aren't alone." Ed stuttered his response, feeling like he was quickly losing control of this situation.

"I am alone. I've been alone for this entire thing. All three years of assaults and threats and having to move and no one believing me. I've been fighting this fight, by myself, this ENTIRE time. And now all of a sudden it's 'sweetheart' and 'you aren't alone', like I'm supposed to just forget the fact that YOU WEREN'T THERE the first time." Charlie was standing there, looking straight at Ed, as she finally let go of all of the emotion from the last few months. "I've been terrified for three years. Three fucking years. WHERE WERE YOU?"

Tears were streaming down Charlie's face as she finally stopped her emotional explosion. Tucker stood there, the pain evident in his face, as he tried to figure out what to say.

"Charlie…" he stepped towards her, but she took another step back.

"No. Don't touch me," she cried. "I can't do this. I can't just play house with you and your new family like nothing ever happened. I just don't have the energy for it anymore." Ed was heartbroken as he watched his daughter fall apart in front of him, and he knew he was partly to blame. He and Olivia had talked several nights ago about the fact that Charlie seemed to be adjusting more smoothly than expected, and she had voiced her concern that they were heading for a collision. Olivia, having been prepared for this kind of outburst, decided to take over for him in hopes of calming the situation down.

"Charlie, I'm sorry if we've come on a bit too strong with you or have put pressure on you to feel a certain way. I know this is hard and confusing for you. We really just want you to feel like you are a part of our lives, because you are. And I know it feels too little too late, and that you were alone for a while, but you don't have to be anymore." Olivia studied the girl's reaction as she spoke the words, but couldn't tell if it was helping or not. Her tears had slowed, but her fists were still clinched by her sides. Ed, unable to stay silent for too long, decided he should cut in.

"I'm sorry I wasn't around earlier. I was a crappy father, and I know that. I will never forgive myself for not being there to protect you. But I want to be here now, if you will let me. Please." Charlie's stance began to relax a little, so Ed tentatively took a step towards her.

"I…" She didn't move away, but was clearly struggling to let the walls back down. Ed reached her and went to wipe the tears from her face.

"I know I don't deserve another chance, but I promise you that if you give me one, I won't screw it up." Ed spoke about as passionately as he could while Olivia watched the scene unfold with her breath held. "Just, come back home with us. You can be as mad at me as you want, but please let us help you. Let me protect you now."

The trio was quiet as Ed and Olivia watched the young woman process what was being said to her. Neither one of them would blame her for walking away. They had yet to hash out what kept father and daughter apart for so many years, but for good reason as they were distracted by the immediate crisis.

"Okay…" She finally answered, quietly, and both Ed and Olivia released the breath they had been holding while waiting for her answer. "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Olivia said. "One step at a time, okay? Let's get out of here." She reached for Charlie's hand, and led her towards the door with Ed following closely behind. He couldn't help but send a thank you up towards the sky as he watched the two women exit together. Olivia was the glue holding all of them together right now, and he needed to figure out how to thank her. But for now, he was content just getting all of them home safely. The rest he could work on tomorrow after he got some sleep.

* * *

 _ **Up Next: How does Ed thank Olivia?**_


	17. Chapter 17

_**There is something weird going on with story reviews. I've emailed support to hopefully get it fixed. In the meantime, I still receive an email when you review, so don't let the technical difficulty stop you from dropping me a line!**_

* * *

It was a little after 6:30am, and Charlie was fitfully sleeping on Olivia's couch. Ed had tried to get her to take the bed, but she was pretty sure there wouldn't be much sleeping. Might as well take the couch and watch some bad television. Now, as the sun was beginning to come up, she was being checked on by her guardian three year old.

"You awake, Tar-lie?" Noah's little voice whispered to her as he turned his head so they were nose to nose. Charlie opened her eyes slowly and formed a smile at the sight in front of her.

"Morning pal. You're up early." Charlie stretched, yawned, and then pulled the little boy up onto the pull-out couch with her as she sat up a bit. Noah happily cuddled into her as she propped herself up on the pillows.

"Mommy and Cap-in still sleeping." Noah informed her, as if she wasn't already aware.

"They are sleeyheads, huh?" Charlie answered with a little tickle to his belly and he erupted into his Noah giggle. "You wanna watch a show?"

"We watch Pan, again?" Noah asked, looking up at her.

 _How does anyone say no to that face? Charlie thought._

"You got it, pal. Here, get under the blanket and I'll get it started." She went to turn the movie on and came back to lay down, with Noah immediately snuggling into her as the movie began. Once again, they were both asleep within the first half hour.

* * *

"Stop thinking so loud," Olivia mumbled as she rolled over and curled into Ed's chest. He just chuckled at her early morning grumpiness.

"Sorry, I'll try to be more thoughtless," he retorted back with his sarcastic tone. Olivia nuzzled her face into his chest and slowly moved up towards his lips.

"Mmmmm," she moaned happily as she leaned to kiss him. "Good morning, Captain Tucker."

"Good morning, my love," he responded and pulled her in for another kiss. "Were you able to get any sleep with all the commotion going on in my head?" He joked with her, but in reality it was true. He hadn't slept a wink last night.

"I bet I got more than you did," she responded, knowing all too well that her boyfriend had been awake all night stewing about the previous day's events. "Did you solve any of our problems with all that fretting?"

"Very funny," he responded. But then he looked at her and got serious again. "Olivia, I am so sorry about all of this."

That captured Olivia's full attention and she sat up, looking at him with a confused look on her face.

"What are you sorry for, babe?" She stroked his face with her hand, noting the stubble beginning to form. She made a mental note to make sure he shaved later this morning.

"Life has been harder for you over the last several months, primarily because of me. First it was my cousin who screwed us over at work. And now you are paying some of the price from my being a non-existent father. I just, you deserve to have only happiness in life. And I keep bringing you pain." As Tucker spoke, he ran the pad of his index finger all along Olivia's face. It was almost as if he was trying to trace and memorize her features.

"Ed, I want to be here during all of this. I'm committed to you. And that means all the baggage that comes with you. But, for the record, you make me incredibly happy and Charlie isn't baggage. Sure, it's tough right now. But the girl has gone through hell and is still living in it. We can't change the past. But we can focus on the present and work to change the future. And we'll do that together." Ed just gazed at her as she spoke.

"I don't deserve you," his voice was quiet but still gruff. As soon as he finished the sentence he engulfed her in a kiss, trying to explore every crevice in her mouth. It was as if he were trying to convey every emotion and thought into one kiss. When they finally broke away, she looked at him breathlessly, unable to formulate a sentence. "I will make this up to you, Olivia. I promise you."

"There's nothing to make up for," she responded, when she was finally able to breathe normally again. "There's no place I'd rather be, than by your side, navigating all of this."

"I don't know what I'd do without you right now," Ed's voice broke at the end of the sentence, and she immediately moved to hold him against her. She had been wondering when he would finally break over all of this, and it made sense that it was happening now. With all the uncertainty in the case and Charlie's emotional outburst earlier, he had been holding up a little too well as far as Olivia was concerned.

"This is all my fault. There's no way, if I had been in Charlie's life, that a school would have swept this under the rug. A New York IAB Captain's daughter? They would've been all over it. And that's on me. No matter what lies Lisa told her, I should've been there. I'm her father. I'm supposed to protect her…" Ed couldn't get anything else out as the emotion just overtook him. Olivia just held his head to her chest, as he took some deep breathes to try and regain control of his emotions.

"This is not your fault. It just isn't. The circumstances stink, that's for sure. But I will not let you blame yourself, Ed Tucker. You are a good man. An amazing man. And we are going to figure this out, okay?"

Ed pulled away slightly so he could look at the woman in front of him. They laid there, face to face, for about 10 minutes, just gathering strength from each other.

"I don't know how to thank you," Ed whispered to her, kissing her lightly. "But I will."

"Just love me. That's all I need."

"That's easy," Ed replied leaning in to kiss her again, but he was interrupted by her stomach rumbling.

"Okay, and maybe feed me," Olivia said with a chuckle. "What time is it, I'm surprised Noah hasn't been in here yet."

"I heard the beginning of Peter Pan about an hour ago, so something tells me he went to find his new best friend."

"I love how much he adores Charlie. She needs that. Maybe we should stop trying so hard and just let Noah work his three year old magic," Olivia noted with a pride only a mother could portray.

"If only it were that simple…"

* * *

By the time Olivia emerged from her shower, Ed had already poured them each a cup of coffee. The living room was quiet, as the DVD player had turned off after the movie ended and Noah was still sound asleep against a snoozing Charlie. Olivia picked up her steaming mug and went to stand by the window, taking in the scene of the two kids in a peaceful slumber. Charlie was asleep on her back, with a protective arm slung around the little boy's back. Noah was sprawled halfway over Charlie, one of his hands clutching the strap of her sleep shirt.

"Hi Olivia," Charlie mumbled, her eyes still closed. "I hope you don't mind that he's out here. I figured you could get more sleep if I put in a movie for us."

"I love that he is out here with you. I actually snuck a few photos of the two of you when you were still asleep." Olivia spoke softly to her as she made her way to sit on the edge of the sofa bed. "Did you sleep okay?"

"Not great. I was dozing when Noah came out, but surprisingly slept pretty good through Peter Pan. Again." Charlie responded with a little laugh. Poor Noah had been trying to watch the entire movie with her for a while now, and they kept falling asleep. She carefully sat up and moved Noah so he was cradled in her lap, still asleep.

"Here, skim milk and 1 sugar right?" Ed handed Charlie a cup of coffee, and she smiled up at him.

"Yeah, you remembered," she said as she took a sip of the perfectly prepared liquid.

"Eh, maybe my next career should be at Starbucks." All three of them shared a quiet laugh at the thought, and then the room got quiet again. After a little while, Charlie finally broke the silence.

"I'm sorry, you know, for my outburst yesterday," she said quietly, looking down at her drink as she spoke. "I don't want you to think I'm ungrateful for everything you both have done for me so far. It's just...a lot for me right now. I feel totally out of control of everything, emotions included."

"Sweetheart..." Olivia whispered and glanced towards Ed who seemed frozen in place. She gave him a little kick as she moved towards Charlie, taking her coffee to place on the side table, then putting one hand on her elbow and the other stroking Noah's hair as he slept against her. "Just as I said yesterday, you do not have to apologize to us for how you are feeling. There's a lot going on and any one of these situations would be enough to derail you. Okay? We just want you to know that we are not going anywhere. And if something makes you uncomfortable, I want you to tell us."

Charlie took a deep breath, letting Olivia's words settle, then looked towards Ed. He was still sitting, paralyzed a bit, his gaze focused downward and his jaw tense. Charlie shot a worried look back towards Liv, then called out to him softly.

"Dad? You still with us?" He inhaled through his nose, showing that he was listening, but still didn't look up at them.

"Ed." Olivia said firmly, hoping he realized that he was making Charlie nervous which was not what they needed right now. He finally got the hint, and looked up, nothing but anguish covering his features. Olivia sensed that the moment was about to get very personal, so she reached for Noah to bring him back into his bed for the rest of his early morning nap. Once they had departed, Charlie moved to sit on the edge of the bed. Ed remained on the floor, kneeling in front of his daughter.

"Charlie..."he began, then reached for her hands and held them in his. "I will never, ever forgive myself for failing you as a father. And for allowing you to feel like you were alone in the middle of this horror. And not being there to stop that prick from going after you again and again. God, if I could change it I would. And one day, when we are far enough out from this, we can sit down and talk about what your mother said about me. And I can clear the air. But for now, you be as mad and emotional as you want with me. I can take it. I deserve it."

"Okay..." Charlie said softly, unsure how else to react at that point. But she was saved by Olivia coming back out from Noah's room to join them, so Ed continued his thoughts.

"Right now, we are going to come up with a plan so you are safe until this mess is over. My top priority is your safety, all of our safety."

"Dad...you don't know this guy. There's no way to stop him." She spoke fearfully, but also well aware of the lines Josh Miller would cross to keep her under his power. "I...I don't want you guys to get caught in the crossfire."

"You don't need to worry about that. Both Olivia and I are experienced detectives and we have an army of people behind us as well. He will not get near you again. Not if it's the last thing I do." Ed spoke directly into her eyes, straight from his heart. And he meant every word. If he had to somehow sacrifice himself to keep this bastard away from his daughter, he would. No questions asked.

Olivia had made her way over to the duo and was sitting on the window-sill, behind Ed. She checked the clock in the kitchen then stood up again.

"What do you say we all get dressed and head to the diner for breakfast. Noah will be over the moon to get his dippy-eggs and toast, and I'm guessing we could all go for a stronger coffee than what my Keurig makes..."

"Sounds good," Ed replied. "Let me jump in the shower and I'll be ready. We can make a plan for the next couple of weeks over an unhealthy spread of food."

Charlie smiled and stood up as well to begin making the couch back up. As Olivia moved to help her, she called over her shoulder to Ed.

"Don't forget to shave...your face feels like needles."

* * *

 _ **Just how deep do Josh's connections run and how far will Ed go to protect his family? Leave a review to find out faster!**_


	18. Chapter 18

_**I know you are all used to daily updates from me. I hope to continue that until the end of the story, but it is not guaranteed. Life is getting busy. Again, your reviews and messages are super motivating! Thanks for being awesome. Now, read on...**_

* * *

"Captain Tucker," Ed grunted into the phone, annoyed that someone was calling his work line while he was in the middle of eating breakfast with his family. They had lazily gotten dressed and walked a few blocks to the local diner. Noah was beside himself, happily explaining to Charlie how to eat "dippy eggs", which was really just dipping toast into fried eggs with a runny yolk. But Charlie ate up every word he told her and would ask a question to follow up which only made Noah even more crazy about her.

"She's good at indulging him," Olivia remarked, as they entered the diner and found an empty booth in the back corner. Once they got settled, Noah insisting he had to sit by Charlie so he could show her how to eat her breakfast, they ordered their drinks and started planning out their week.

"I love having you at my place and I know that Noah agrees, but if you feel uncomfortable or want a real bed, maybe we should talk about you and your dad going back to his place?" Olivia made the offer, selfishly hoping Charlie would decline. If she didn't, who knows how long it would be before she would be able to fall asleep next to Ed.

"I don't know…" Charlie responded very hesitantly, unsure of what she should do. The idea of being stuck alone with her dad was pretty overwhelming, but Olivia and Noah technically weren't her family, so she felt like she was imposing on them each time she stayed over. Olivia seemed to read her thoughts.

"I actually had the idea to tuck away one of those double-height air mattresses in the back of the alcove between my room and Noah's. That would get you out of the living room. If you decide to stay a bit longer…"

"You don't have to decide right now, okay?" Ed broke into the conversation, to make sure they were all still comfortable. "You've got a couple of options to think about. And we can even alternate back and forth between them."

"Okay," said Charlie and she took another big sip of her coffee. She let out an exasperated sigh. "I will start looking for a new apartment, too. Otherwise, we'll be having endless sleepovers."

"Sleepover!" Noah, who had been engrossed in coloring his placemat finally joined the discussion. "I like sleepovers. And we NOT fall asleep during Pan, Tar-lie."

"You got it, pal." Charlie snorted a little laugh with her response and turned to look at the boy, poking him in the nose which elicited a giggle.

Ed thought back to how lighthearted the discussion had been as he listened to the voice on the phone deal a devastating blow. He could see Olivia, Charlie, and Noah cutting up at the table, Noah clearly telling them a story and the two ladies laughing.

"Captain Tucker, are you hearing me?"

"Yes, Agent Fuller. But I don't understand how you didn't have enough to keep him in custody?"

"His alibi checked out. Obviously, I know it is a cover, but for now it holds up. So we let him go and keep digging. We will eventually find our golden ticket or he will slip up."

"You mean when he comes after my daughter again?" Ed was getting angry. He understood what they were trying to do, but he wasn't willing to risk his family. "I'm not going to let you use her as bait."

"That's not the goal here, Captain Tucker. We plan to keep an eye on Charlie and tail Josh as much as we can until we can nail the bastard. He thinks he got away with it. He'll make a mistake."

"I don't like this," Tucker growled into the phone. "I don't like this one bit."

"The fact is this: it is a federal investigation. You don't get a say. I don't have to keep you informed. I'm doing so as a professional courtesy." The agent was clearly not interested in Tucker's feelings about their plan. But Ed was livid. He took some deep breaths and tried to play nice for the time being.

"I understand. Thank you. I hope you'll continue to keep me updated."

"Will do."

Once the call had ended Ed cursed loudly as he kicked over the trash can on the curb. A few pedestrians looked over and hurried away, but he didn't care. He was now tasked with going into the diner and explaining to Charlie that once again, law enforcement decided not to protect her from Josh Miller. He had never wanted a cigarette more in his entire life.

"Fuck…"

* * *

Olivia was beginning to get worried, as Ed had been gone for longer than usual. She could tell Charlie's anxiety was going up as well. Not wanting to leave her and Noah at the table, she decided to try and get the girl distracted.

"Noah, do you remember the joke Mr. Sonny taught you the other day?" Olivia asked her son, hoping he could do the trick. Noah's face puckered into a thoughtful pose, then his eyes got big.

"YES!" He turned his entire body to face Charlie, with a big grin. "Knock-knock."

"Who's there"

"In-rup-tin' cow"

"Interrupting cow w-"

"MOOOOO" Noah roared the tag line and erupted into laughter. Several other patrons in nearby booths began to chuckle at the little boy and his joke. Olivia and Charlie were also cracking up, both at the joke and at Noah's laughter.

"Noah, that's great. You should be a comedian." Charlie exclaimed, praising the little boy much to his delight. He looked up at her with big eyes.

"Tar-lie, what's a 'median?" Charlie just chuckled again.

"A comedian is someone who gets paid to make people laugh. You could be rich!" The conversation was interrupted by Olivia's phone going off, signaling she had a message. She apologized, went to look at it, and froze.

 _Ed: We have a big problem._

 _Olivia: Where are you?_

 _Ed: Had to put my nicotine patch on. Be in soon._

 _Olivia: What is going on?_

 _Ed: We need to eat and get home. I'll tell you then. Just act normal._

Yeah right, Olivia thought as she put her phone away and turned her attention back to Noah and Charlie. The young girl was eyeing her closely and opened her mouth to say something when the waitress came with their food.

"Dippy eggs!" Noah exclaimed and Olivia breathed a sigh of relief. Saved by the three year old again.

* * *

The foursome had returned to Olivia's apartment, and the girls were busy in the little alcove trying to decide if it would work to fit the air mattress. It was clear to Ed that Olivia wanted them to just stay with her. Charlie seemed okay with the idea, and obviously that was what he preferred as well. He needed Olivia to get through this without punching someone. Or worse. Plus, he still had an incredibly uneasy feeling so keeping his family close to him was priority.

He'd been wanting to broach the subject of living together with Olivia for a little while now. With all the drama with their jobs and now with Charlie, it was never a good time. But maybe this could be a natural transition to it. If it went well, in such small quarters, maybe they could look for a bigger place. They could lease either his or Olivia's apartment to Charlie and her roommate and solve all housing related issues. He began to envision house hunting with Olivia and slowly drifted away from the banter happening in the apartment.

"Ed! Are you paying attention?" Olivia said loudly, holding her hands on her hips and waiting for him to respond.

"Oh! Yeah. Sorry. Lost in thought for a bit. What'd you say?" Ed shook his head a bit, and focused on his girlfriend. God, he loved that raised eyebrow she was giving him right then.

"I was saying we might be able to fit the day bed from your apartment back here, so your daughter isn't sleeping on an air mattress. But maybe we should get YOU the daybed, and Charlie can have your spot." Olivia spoke to him with a gleam in her eye and a smirk. She knew he was worried about whatever happened on that phone call, but they needed to keep Charlie calm. Olivia was trying to keep Ed reigned in until they could find some time to talk about recent developments.

"Oh. Yeah. That's a good idea. Do we know anyone with a truck?" Ed responded as he rubbed the back of his head.

"Carisi has one, and he should be off today. I'll text him," Olivia said, eyeing Ed and moving into the kitchen where she left her phone. Charlie remained, still sitting on the ottoman that currently occupied the space.

"Dad, what aren't you telling me?" She asked, point blank, as she stood up. Ed just let out a sigh, then chuckled a bit. He shouldn't be surprised that Charlie was this perceptive. She was his flesh and blood, after all. Olivia walked back over to them, holding her phone to her ear. Apparently Sonny had called her right back in response to the text.

"Sonny can meet you at your place in about 3 hours." Ed checked his watch and let out another sigh.

"Confirmed," he spoke, as if he were suddenly back in the office. Olivia just gave him a look and spoke to Sonny before hanging up the phone. She glanced into the living room to make sure Noah was still engrossed with his toys.

"Okay, spill it Ed. What the hell is going on?" She moved to stand next to Charlie after she asked the question, assuming whatever it was would end up rocking the girl. Ed just stood there, looking back and forth between the two women as he tried to decide what to say. In the end, bluntness won out.

"Josh is back on the streets. He gave them some bullshit alibi that checked out for the time being. So they cut him loose." He kept his eyes on Charlie and watched as her face drained of all color and she fell backwards against the wall, shaking her head back and forth.

"No. No no no no. Not again. They can't let him go. He's going to find me. Oh god." She was mumbling as her eyes closed and her whole body began to shake. Olivia went to her and put an arm around her waist, trying to keep her standing upright. Then she looked over at Ed.

"Are they keeping tabs on him? Still investigating?" Her mind switched into detective mode, as she worked to make sense of it herself.

"They plan to watch him closely as they keep investigating and digging. In their words, either they find the golden ticket or he will slip up..." Ed immediately regretted saying that last part as he watched his daughter begin to hyperventilate. Olivia shot him a look and immediately bent down to get eye level with Charlie.

"Hey, Charlie, it's okay. We're are right here with you. He can't get to you with us here, okay?" Ed immediately felt guilty and joined his girlfriend and daughter in the corner of the alcove.

"Liv's right. He won't touch you. He's gotta get through me first."

"You don't understand..." was all Charlie said before she just shut down completely. Olivia looked at Ed, hoping they could communicate via their eyes what to do next. But neither one of them had the slightest clue. Ed, eventually, just decided they should keep moving forward with their day.

"Okay, I know we are all upset. But let's just keep going as planned. Charlie, you and Olivia stay here and hang out with Noah. Maybe look online for some new bedding for your daybed? I'll meet Carisi soon. Then tonight, we will order in and try to not fall asleep during Peter Pan."

Olivia nodded her agreement, and looked to Charlie who was still staring at the floor with no color on her face. She was incredibly grateful the girl had been okay with staying at her apartment. Olivia noticed that she was feeling strong maternal instincts at this point, but there was also an element of fear that she couldn't quite pinpoint. It made her want Ed by her side even more. As Charlie excused herself to the bathroom, Ed moved straight to Olivia and took her into his arms.

"What are we going to do?" Olivia asked with a muffled voice as her face was buried in Ed's neck.

"I don't know yet..." Ed remarked. "I just don't know."

* * *

Later that evening found them all on the couch, bellies full of Thai food, nearing the end of Peter Pan. Charlie's temporary bed was now set up in the alcove and her and Olivia made plans to go to her apartment the next day after work to retrieve whatever she wanted with Carisi playing chauffeur. Much to Noah's delight, all four of them were still awake as they watched Captain Hook run across the water to the "Tick-Tock" rhythm. Noah giggled continuously, as this was his favorite part.

"Look it, Tar-lie! Cap'in Hook scared!" he roared as he continued to laugh while sitting on Charlie's lap. Tucker, who was sitting on the other end of the couch with Olivia curled up in the middle of all of them, looked at Noah with a teasing glare.

"Captain Hook must not be a real Captain, then, huh Noah?" The little boy turned towards him, then, with a very serious look all of a sudden.

"You right. Cap'ins are brave. They not scared. Like you, right?" Noah looked at him with totally adoration. Ed Tucker was clearly the father figure in his life and Noah thought he was invincible which did wonders for the IAB Captain's ego. The apartment buzzer blared just then, startling all four occupants of the sofa. Ed shot Olivia a look as he went over to answer the intercom.

"Delivery," came the voice over the speaker.

"Were you expecting anything, babe?" Tucker asked Olivia, who shook her head no. He went to put on his shoes and decided at the last minute to grab his gun and holster it. "Okay, I'll be right back."

Charlie looked at Olivia with wide eyes, so the older woman tried to give her a reassuring smile.

"Men and their guns...they can't even check the mail without it," her attempt at a joke only worked to make Charlie give a half smile. But her eyes betrayed the fear she felt as they waited for Ed. When he returned about 10 minutes later, he was holding a huge bouquet of red roses but his face clearly was not happy about it.

"FLOWERS!" Noah jumped up with excitement, but Ed immediately halted his actions.

"No, Noah, you can't touch these right now..." his voice was stern, which Noah wasn't used to, so the little tyke backed up and cuddled with Charlie again who reassured him and got him back into the movie. Olivia was up in an instant and followed him as he put the vase on the table.

"What is it, Ed? Your scaring me," she looked at him as she spoke and could see the fear in his eyes. A fear she hadn't seen before. She moved to pick up the note that was still attached to the bouquet as Charlie made her way over to them. Olivia opened the tiny envelope addressed to Charlie and read the message.

 _Roses are red_

 _Violets are blue_

 _I don't care who is in my way_

 _I'm coming for you._

* * *

 _ **What comes next? Leave a review to find out...**_


	19. Chapter 19

**_Now, where were we..._**

* * *

 ** _Previously:_**

"Delivery," came the voice over the speaker.

"Were you expecting anything, babe?" Tucker asked Olivia, who shook her head no. He went to put on his shoes and decided at the last minute to grab his gun and holster it. "Okay, I'll be right back."

Charlie looked at Olivia with wide eyes, so the older woman tried to give her a reassuring smile.

"Men and their guns...they can't even check the mail without it," her attempt at a joke only worked to make Charlie give a half smile. But her eyes betrayed the fear she felt as they waited for Ed. When he returned about 10 minutes later, he was holding a huge bouquet of red roses but his face clearly was not happy about it.

"FLOWERS!" Noah jumped up with excitement, but Ed immediately halted his actions.

"No, Noah, you can't touch these right now..." his voice was stern, which Noah wasn't used to, so the little tyke backed up and cuddled with Charlie again who reassured him and got him back into the movie. Olivia was up in an instant and followed him as he put the vase on the table.

"What is it, Ed? You're scaring me," she looked at him as she spoke and could see the fear in his eyes. A fear she hadn't seen before. She moved to pick up the note that was still attached to the bouquet as Charlie made her way over to them. Olivia opened the tiny envelope addressed to Charlie and read the message.

 _Roses are red_

 _Violets are blue_

 _I don't care who is in my way_

 _I'm coming for you._

* * *

 _ **Chapter 19**_

Olivia's hand started to shake as she read the note again, making sure she wasn't hallucinating. Then she slowly looked up at Ed, now mirroring his fearful look. Neither of them spoke, as there wasn't much to say right then.

"Dad?" Charlie's voice, though soft and shaky, caused them both to jump. "Oh God…."

Olivia immediately went over and took the girl in her arms, one hand resting on the back of her head and holding her close. Olivia's emotions were rampant after reading that note, between her fear for Charlie and her family, as well as the idea that yet another psycho knew where she lived. All she could do was just tighten her grip on Ed's daughter and look at him to try and calm herself down.

"What did the note say?" Charlie asked, her voice muffled a bit given the hold Olivia had on her.

"You don't need to read this," Ed responded, reaching for the card. "I've already called Agent Fuller and they are on their way over. We are fine until then." Charlie pulled out of Olivia's grasp just then and looked straight at her father.

"Tell me what it said," her voice was firmer than Ed was expecting and there was a fire in her eyes. He was desperate for her not to see those words, but it was a losing battle. So he handed the card over to her and watched as she tried to take in the threat. Charlie took a deep breath, straightened her shoulders, and looked back up at Ed.

"I told you," she said and continued to talk as her voice got a little louder with each word. "I told you he would find me. You can't stop him. Just…take Olivia and Noah away and leave me here to deal with it. Please."

"Okay, okay, we are going to calm down," Olivia finally found her voice and tried to be the voice of reason, also reminding them that Noah was just a few feet away. "The detectives are on their way, so let's not panic until they get here and we have more information."

* * *

"Explain to me why, three hours after you let this bastard go, he is sending my daughter threats. At my girlfriend's apartment." Ed fumed as he stormed into Agent Fuller's office. The federal agents had taken Olivia's apartment by storm, combing the outside of the building and inside hallways for possible cameras or any possible way this guy found out where she lived. They took the flowers, vase, and note to their lab and had then advised Tucker that they would be keeping 24 hour surveillance outside of the building. But it wasn't enough for him. Once the FBI was parked safely across from the apartment, Tucker left Olivia and Charlie at home with a sleeping Noah and drove straight to Agent Fuller.

"Captain Tucker, I was expecting your visit," Agent Fuller spoke as he took his glasses off and stood up to shake Ed's hand, but Ed didn't reciprocate. So Fuller cleared his throat and sat back down, looking up at Tucker as he stood over the desk. "I know that you want answers. But I don't have them yet."

"I don't want answers. I want action. I want this bastard behind bars so my daughter can stop having panic attacks every 5 minutes and my girlfriend isn't having flashbacks to the last time someone stalked her home and no one did a damn thing. They've been through enough trauma, stop fucking adding to it." Ed knew he was crossing a line, but he no longer cared. Enough was enough. They could crucify him professionally if they wanted to, but he was going to protect his family.

"Listen, Ed," Agent Fuller began as he stood from his desk to be eye level with an irate Tucker.

"No. YOU listen to me. Charlie is my baby girl. Olivia is my…she's my _everything_. I may not have been able to stop their past traumas but I will make damn sure that they don't experience any more. With or without your help, Agent."

After Ed's last sentence, Fuller stood for a bit and analyzed the man in front of him. Ed Tucker was standing straight up, chest out and large, bicep muscles bulging as he clinched his fists on and off. The deep breaths he was taking made him all that more intimidating. But it was the piercing blue eyes that got to Agent Fuller. They were crystal clear, but raging mad. As he tried to size up whether Tucker would make good of his threat to find Josh Miller on his own, there was a knock on his office door.

"Agent Fuller, sorry to interrupt, but your wife is here." Fuller let out an extended sigh and looked down a bit. Tucker picked up on the shift in body language as the messenger made his exit.

"You have kids, Agent?" Tucker asked, ready to use whatever leverage he could.

"I do. Three."

"Then you must understand that as a father, to learn that time after time the police…an organization that I have dedicated my life to…has failed to protect my daughter from endless trauma, is my worst fear being realized. So, even if you don't feel you can take the extra steps as an agent, you should be able to take them as a father." Ed's voice, once again broke at the end of his paragraph. But he could see the small shift in Fuller's eyes. So he nodded to him and walked out.

* * *

"Hey, Olivia?" Charlie knocked on the wall outside of her bedroom door. Olivia looked up from her iPad and smiled at the girl, taking off her glasses and placing them on top of the tablet on her nightstand.

"What's up, sweetie? Come in," She sat up and patted the spot next to her on the bed. Charlie didn't move right at first, but then slowly walked around and sat tentatively on the edge of the bed and turned to look at Olivia without saying anything.

"Talk to me…" Olivia encouraged her, sensing that she needed to talk but wasn't quite able to get over the first hurdle.

"Do you think my dad is okay? He seemed really upset when he left..." Charlie was chewing on her bottom lip, signaling to Liv that she was still pretty worked up.

"I wouldn't worry too much. He's handling it okay. He's just stressed because he loves you so much and wants you to be safe and secure."

"I'm worried about you and Noah, too. He knows where you live. There's nothing stopping him from..." her voice trailed off as emotions began to bubble up closer to the surface.

"Hey, Charlie, look at me for a sec," Olivia waited until she had the girl's eyes. "We are safe here, okay? If I really thought we weren't, we would all be going somewhere else. Between your dad and I being veteran police officers, and also the cruiser sitting outside watching, he's not getting through that door."

"You say that now, but I saw you after you read the note. It scared you." Charlie spoke softly, but honestly as she looked to the older woman. Olivia hesitated a bit, trying to calculate her response.

"I've been working in SVU for a long time now. And, unfortunately, sometimes work follows me home." She paused for a bit and took a breath. "But recently, I've learned to lean on people and let them into my life. To understand that I have people who will help me and protect me. Just like your dad and I are trying to help and protect you now."

"I don't feel very protected. He keeps finding me. This is never going to end, Olivia. It's like I'm that big red target always getting hit." A lone tear made its way down Charlie's face and Olivia reached out slowly to wipe it away. Only the tears fell harder as soon as her finger stroked the girl's cheek.

"Oh, baby..." Olivia moved closer to her and held her face in her hands as she spoke. "It isn't abnormal to be revictimized. In fact, it's much more common than you may think. You are not a target. You have done nothing wrong."

"Right...nothing wrong. Except continually allowing him to find me and attack me." Charlie said with a little huff, betraying the loathing she felt towards herself and her situation. Her tears had slowed, but she wasn't making any signal she wanted to move away from Olivia.

"I was revictimized," Olivia said it quietly and Charlie's eyes shot up to hers. Realizing she struck a chord, she cautiously continued. "I had a run-in with a rapist while undercover in a prison. Then several years later, another perp followed me home. He managed to attack me two different times over the course of 18 months."

"Olivia..." Charlie grabbed her hand tightly, both to show support but also appreciation for the hard conversation they were having.

"I blamed myself for a long time. Thinking I left myself open to it. Since then I've realized that it wasn't my fault. That no one had the right to attack me, no matter what the circumstances were. And I've also allowed myself to trust more people to have my back. To lean on people when I needed to. Noah really helped me get there faster. And now I have you and your dad. My squad. Structure. Stability. Love." Now it was Olivia's turn to shed some tears, matching the water running down Charlie's face as well. The two women sat side by side on the bed, tightly holding the other one's hands, as if they were each other's lifeline in that moment.

"That is what we are doing for you, Charlie. You are not alone. You are safer now than you ever have been. You have people who care about you and love you. And we are doing everything we can to keep you safe and protected."

Charlie finally allowed herself to give in to the harsh sobs that were hidden beneath all of her insecurity and fear. Her entire body shook as she let go of the ocean deep emotion. Olivia pulled the girl into her arms and held her tightly, rocking back and forth just a bit.

"It's going to be okay, Charlie. Maybe not tomorrow. But eventually."

* * *

 ** _The heavy rain on our favorite family will be letting up, albeit briefly...but I still want your reviews!_**


	20. Chapter 20

_**S** **ome much needed R &R for our little family. The M rating applies for the last part of this chapter, just as an FYI. **_

* * *

It had been two weeks since the flowers arrived at Olivia's apartment and things had been quiet. The police had not been able to trace the threat back to Josh, so instead they were busy trying to find witnesses and dig up more dirt. An agent was still on 24 hour surveillance in front of Olivia's apartment building and luckily there had been no action. The little makeshift family of four was settling into the idea of sharing space, but Ed and Olivia were finding it difficult to navigate their lives as a couple in such small quarters. With the help of his daughter and Amanda Rollins, Ed had a plan to make it up to Olivia. He had booked a room with a river view at the Ritz-Carleton in Battery Park that they would occupy after dinner and a show. All he had told Olivia was that she needed to be home by 5pm, and he would take care of the rest.

Rollins was going to bring Jessie over to the apartment for a sleepover, although Charlie insisted her and Noah didn't need a police officer in the apartment. Ed wasn't going to take chances, and Amanda was happy for some female company. He had already packed an overnight bag for himself and Olivia and taken it to the hotel. Now he was just waiting on her to actually get home.

"You sure you will be okay without us?" He asked Charlie for the fourth time in an hour.

"Dad, I'm 24. There's a cop outside. There will be a cop inside. We are fine. Stop worrying and tend to your girlfriend," Charlie responded with a little knowing smirk. She had been feeling bad about intruding on their lives, and was also well aware they had likely cooled down their sexual appetites with her sleeping on the other side of the wall. As gross as it was to think about her dad having sex, she wanted him to be happy. And Olivia too. They deserved some time away.

"You're a good kid, Charlie." Ed looked at her fondly, all of a sudden getting a little deep. She just looked away and busied herself on her phone.

"Noah, what do you want on the pizza we are getting for dinner?" she yelled to the young tot who was likely up to no good in his bedroom.

"PIZZAAAAAA" he came running out and crashed into Charlie's legs, looking up at her with a big grin. "Pepa-roni?"

"Whatever you want, pal," Charlie responded and plugged the order into her phone.

* * *

Ed and Olivia were seated by the window of a steakhouse overlooking the East River. Olivia was gazing out over the water, but Ed had his sight on her. _She is gorgeous_ , he thought to himself. He almost had to pinch himself every few minutes as a reminder that she was with him that night. She had changed into deep green cocktail dress with a plunge neckline and keyhole back, clearly trying to work her boyfriend over. And she succeeded, as Ed had yet to take his eyes off of her. She looked back over at him as she reached for her glass of red, and gave him a smirk.

"You're staring," she said as she moved the glass to her lips. Ed just smirked right back at her and also brought his drink up to sip.

"Can't help it," he said dryly after swallowing the sweet, red liquid.

"Are you sure you are okay being away from Charlie the whole night?" she asked, knowing how nervous and tense he had been for the last several weeks, or months really. As happy as she was to finally have some alone time with him, she worried that he wouldn't be able to enjoy himself.

"Absolutely. Rollins is there. The patrol car is outside. Miller hasn't been heard from in a bit. And…I miss you."

"You've been living with me, silly." she responded, knowing she was baiting him. And it worked as his eyes got dark and he reached for her hands, playing with her fingers as he spoke.

"No. I mean, I _really_ miss you. And I want a night with you, to remind you how much I love you. And to thank you…for everything you have done for me and my daughter." His voice was deep and gravely as he responded, which only turned Liv on more as she kept her eyes locked with his.

"I love you. And I love Charlie. You don't have to thank me for that. But I also won't say no to a night alone, in bed, with you."

"You know, if I didn't have these show tickets I'd take you back to that bed right now…." he said softly as he ran his fingers along her forearm.

"We could skip it," she suggested, just as ready to be with him as he was with her.

"You don't want to see Hamilton? Ok…" he said, knowing she was going to flip out when she found out he was able to snag tickets to the hottest and most sold out show on broadway. He was right. Her eyes bulged and she nearly shrieked, uncharacteristically.

"You got Hamilton tickets?! If I didn't love you before, I definitely do now." Her eyes were shining with an excitement he hadn't seen in months.

"So, I guess the sex will have to wait then?" he deadpanned back to her, and she just laughed.

"I'll make it worth your while, I promise." She leaned over and kissed him on the lips.

* * *

"Tar-lie, we build fort now?" Ever since their first sleepover a few weeks ago, Noah had been begging to make another fort with Charlie. Knowing she couldn't say no that night, she made him a deal.

"I tell you what - you go get your jammies on and brush your teeth, and I'll get the blankets ready for the fort." Noah eyed her trying to size up her offer, and must have decided it was legitimate because he made his way into his room to find his race car pajamas. Charlie easily pulled some blankets out of the storage trunk against the wall, while Rollins came out of the bedroom just having put Jessie down for the night.

"How ya doing, kid?" Rollins asked as she got comfortable on the couch. As much fun as the evening had been with the kids, Amanda had been looking forward to some girl talk.

"Doing okay," Charlie answered, knowing she meant that question to be deeper than just the current mood. She shot a sideways glance towards Amanda as she continued. "Just wishing this was all over, ya know?"

"Yeah, I do. You're ready to get your life back." Rollins could empathize with the girl, though she wasn't going to voice that.

"Well, I guess. Although I'm not really sure what my life will look like if this ever comes to an end. This fear…it's all I've known for three years. I'm not even sure I can remember what it felt like before this happened." Charlie was being honest, feeling like she could voice this kind of stuff to the young detective in a way she couldn't to her father. He would just blame himself more, and even though things weren't perfect between them, she didn't want that.

"It will be different, ya know," Rollins spoke from experience to her. "You'll have to relearn how to experience life without being afraid. But you've got two amazing people behind you as you do it. I can't think of anyone I'd rather have in my life than Liv, if I were to face what you are facing."

"Yeah….she's pretty amazing," Charlie said softly. "I'm glad my dad took her out for the night. I've been all up in her space for a while now."

"I still have no idea how those two got together, but now that they are, its perfect." Rollins spoke as if she were lost in thought, but Charlie didn't want to push her on why.

"Yeah, she makes my dad happy. I've never known him to be like this, and I think it's because of her. But…I definitely don't want to think about their night together." Charlie started laughing a bit and shook her head, while Rollins just smiled.

"Yeah, no thanks." As Rollins responded, Charlie noticed that Noah had not returned.

"Noah, you almost ready?" she called into his room and heard some rustling around.

"Tar-lie! I stuck!" he yelped and she could hear him trying to make his way out into the living room. She met him halfway and just dissolved into laughter. The boy had tried to stick his head through the arm of his pajamas, and had gotten it stuck. So he was standing in front of her looking like a cone-head.

"Noah, you silly boy! Here let me help you."

"Tanks, Tar-lie. You save me," Noah responded, and then proceeded to giggle as Charlie tickled his belly.

"Nah, I think it's the other way around pal."

* * *

"Oh god, Ed. Don't stop baby." Olivia was panting as she grasped the sheets of the king-sized hotel bed. Ed was situated between her legs, holding her hips down as he loved her with his mouth. He'd already made her come once with his hands, and she had begun to reciprocate when he laid her back and stopped her.

"Tonight is about you…and I'm not done with you yet…."

Now she was on her back and on the verge of her second orgasm of the night. Her hips began to squirm under Ed's firm hold, and one hand let go of the sheets to grasp what little hair she could on his head.

"Yes. Ugh. Right there…please…." her head began to thrash from side to side as her entire body tensed up. Ed continued to pump his fingers in and out of her while sucking at her center until she once again exploded around him. He slowed his movements slightly, to help her calm down a bit and catch her breath. Then he slowly kissed his way back up her body, stopping for a bit to nip at her breasts, then eventually settled his body on top of hers.

"I can't feel my legs," she said breathlessly, and finally opened her eyes back up to look at her love. "God, Ed. You…Are…Amazing." She placed a kiss on his lips between each word she spoke. And he just grinned down at her, as he moved his hips a bit to rub himself against her.

"Oh! Ah! I need a minute…too sensitive" she responded, but then pulled his face down for a deeper kiss. "I love you. I love you so much."

"I love you too, Olivia. Always will."

"Thank you for tonight. I didn't realize how much I just needed this time with you," she said as she ran her hands up and down his spine. And she meant it. She wouldn't change the fact that Charlie and Noah were both under the same roof as them, but it had significantly changed their lives as a couple. And as much as she loved the family they were building, she missed the intimacy.

"You don't have to thank me. It was partly selfish on my part," he answered with a smirk. And then got a serious look to him again. "What do you say, once all of this is over with Charlie, to us looking for a bigger place. Together."

Olivia looked at him for a while, realizing that in all of her life she had never felt this secure. This loved. And even if she still harbored a fear of abandonment, she couldn't let it ruin what they had.

"I'd like that," she responded, then repositioned her body so it was ready to take him. He quickly got the point and moved his hand to make sure she was still wet and ready for him, then looked at her.

"You okay?" he asked. He never made love to her without checking in beforehand.

"Yes. Make love to me, Ed." she responded and then let out a gasp as he slowly entered her. Tucker grunted softly as he began to work his way into her heat, relishing in how incredible she felt. Once he was all the way in, he paused and kissed each of her closed eyelids.

"I love you, Olivia. More than anything," he spoke straight into her soul as he proceeded to make love to her well into the night.

* * *

 _ **As always, read and review!**_


	21. Chapter 21

_**The reviews are all messed up again. Boo. Know that I do get emails when each of you review, so even though they haven't posted I still read them. So keep leaving your thoughts!**_

* * *

A little after 2am found Charlie and Amanda still lounging on the couch, sipping on lemon drop cocktails and chatting. Noah had long ago passed out on the floor in his fort. His goal to stay awake all night for their sleepover only lasted until around 11pm. Once Charlie thought he was good and asleep, she brought him back to his bed and got him comfortable.

"Goodnight, pal. Love you," she whispered and kissed his forehead. She watched him for a bit, thinking about much he changed her outlook on life. Noah brought no drama with him, only excitement each time she walked in the door and distraction from how shitty life was at the moment. She meant what she said to him earlier, he was saving her one silly moment at a time.

"Where'd you go just then?" Rollins asked her, as she munched on popcorn to try and absorb some of the alcohol they were consuming.

"Oh, just thinking. It's sort of funny, and maybe weird, that the best thing that's happened in my life recently is my dad dating someone with the cutest kid ever. But Noah…in his own little way…is probably the best thing going in my life right now." Charlie was surprised that she voiced her thoughts as openly as she did to Amanda. But it just felt natural. The woman was there and wanting her own girl night, so there was just something that naturally evolved between the two new friends as they opened up to each other.

"I don't think that is weird. I think it makes sense. Kids have a way of being therapy when we need it. Must have to do with their total innocence." Rollins responded, and then continued a bit. "Sometimes I feel like Jessie is my therapy too. Sounds messed up, since I'm her mom, but it's true."

Charlie sat for a bit, observing the way Rollins would drift off when she spoke. It was clear that she had been through some shit in her life as well, not that she was going to bring it up. But that made Charlie feel even more comfortable with her, and since she had some alcohol in her system, it kept her talking too.

"He also makes me feel like I'm a part of the family. He's always so happy to see me. So even when I'm feeling really awkward being around Olivia and my dad, he just makes it seem like I'm supposed to be there. I mean, Liv has been great and she's never made me feel like I'm not wanted, but still…." her voice drifted off, unsure how to voice how she felt sometimes.

"Nah, I get it," Rollins said, her southern accent getting stronger as the night wore on. "You are still trying to get to know them. And, if you aren't used to having parents who are involved in your life, then it can feel like you're out of place for a while."

"Hm, maybe that's it. My mom…she kind of sucked. Especially once we moved away and she got remarried." Charlie hadn't talked about her relationship with her mother much. But it played a huge role in how hard it had been for her to deal with her assaults. "It's sort of hard to try and figure out how to have a parental figure back in my life at 24 years old." She chuckled a little bit, but in a self-disgusted kind of way. Rollins recognized that kind of laugh.

"Hey…" she said and waited until Charlie looked up at her. "You know it's not about you. Why your mom was the way she was. That's on her."

"I'd believe you, except that it seems like lots of shitty things happen to me. It can't always be someone else's fault." Charlie responded, honestly, but also sort of sick of hearing people tell her not to blame herself.

"That just means that you got a shitty draw from life. Not that you did anything wrong," Rollins wasn't letting this go. "I've seen a lot of people that have a shitty draw. It's never their fault and it isn't yours."

Charlie shifted, a little uncomfortable with where this conversation was going. But before she could figure out how to change the subject, Amanda kept going.

"But…I think the tide is turning. You've got your dad back, Liv and Noah. It may take time, but your shitty hand of cards is almost out. Trust me on that." Amanda then downed the rest of her drink and put the glass on the coffee table. "I'm gonna grab water, you want one?"

"Yeah…that'd be great," Charlie responded, finishing her drink as well and reaching for the popcorn bag. "Hey, Amanda?"

Rollins paused as she walked to the kitchen and turned back to the girl.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks," Charlie said sincerely.

"Oh, anytime. I need more grown-up time in my life. We should make this a regular thing," she said and winked at Charlie as she turned to continue her hunt for water.

* * *

Meanwhile downtown, Ed and Olivia weren't getting any sleep either. They had collapsed, exhausted from getting each other off a few times, but hadn't made any attempts to close their eyes and rest. At one point, Olivia had gotten up to clean herself a bit and brought a warm washcloth back to Ed. But now she was spooned back against him, enjoying the feel of his body behind her and his arms holding her close.

"I love you," he whispered to her, with an almost desperate tone to it. She turned onto her back so she could see his face.

"I love you too, Ed," she responded. "What's going on? Something's up."

"Can't get anything passed you, huh?" He said, teasingly, but also trying to avoid her questioning.

"Well, you are the one who wanted to date a detective," she responded with a smile and stroked his face. "Even worse, a Lieutenant."

"The most beautiful Lieutenant I've ever known," he said and leaned down to kiss her lips. He went to deepen the kiss, and she responded by opening her mouth up to him and wrapping her leg around his waist. Her body was quickly responding to his kiss and her breathy moans gave that away. After a few minutes, Ed abruptly pulled away and rolled onto his back with his eyes closed. Olivia took a second to recover from his move, and went to take his hand.

"What is it, Ed? What just happened?" She asked, trying to hide the hurt in her voice because she knew that his pulling away had nothing to do with her. He just sighed and rubbed at his eyes a bit, before turning onto his side again so they could be face to face.

"I'm…struggling, Olivia." Ed spoke slowly, with emotion in his tone. But he didn't offer anything passed the three words at first. His eyes eventually looked down, and Olivia took that moment to kiss his forehead and settle back down onto the pillow.

"With what, baby? Talk to me." She squeezed his hand in hers and waited patiently for him to decide to talk. It was about five minutes before he took a deep breathe and began his explanation.

"All of this stuff with Charlie has just, really rocked me and my thoughts about how to be a good man for you." He spoke in an almost whisper, and looked down at their interlocked hands as he continued. "I know that you've been through….hell. More than once. And now, I've found out that my daughter has…" His voice broke a bit, so he took a small break. Trying to breathe through the emotion before he continued. "I've just been thinking a lot, lately, about whether I've ever done anything to upset you and you just didn't tell me."

"Ed…" she began, but he put his finger to her lips begging her to let him get all of this off of his chest.

"I know that sometimes I get so…carried away with you…that maybe I'm a little too rough. And you've never said anything, but I want you to. If I ever do something that isn't okay, you need to tell me. Right then. Because I never, ever want to hurt you in that way Olivia. I'd rather die than cause you pain like that." Tears began to flow down his cheeks and Olivia was speechless. Had he been harboring this ever since Charlie came back into their lives? Or worse, before that?

"Oh, baby….no. No. Don't do this to yourself. You have NEVER hurt me in that way. Ever. I have always enjoyed when we are together. I like when you get rough and frenzied sometimes. But I promise you, that if something ever was not okay, I would tell you right then and we'd talk about it. But I can't imagine that ever happening. Because you love me in a way no one else ever has. Or ever will."

Tucker just looked at her with tears still running down his face. Seeing his pain caused the tears to fall from her eyes as well, so they just laid there, forehead to forehead, matching tears and breathing together.

"I'm sorry…" he finally whispered to her.

"For what?"

"Being this emotional. I'm not normally this insecure and worried, but lately…." he trailed off a bit, not even needing to finish the sentence. She already knew.

"I know. It's okay, baby."

"No. It's not okay. This isn't okay, Olivia. You and Charlie….are the two most important women in my life. And some asshole….different assholes…have hurt you both in ways that I just can't fathom. And it…it just kills me, Olivia. I couldn't protect either of you."

"Stop, Ed. Just stop. This…this is not on you. You can't blame yourself for not protecting us. Unfortunately, bad people exist. And we can't just lock ourselves in a bullet proof bubble. But we are all together now, and hopefully they will find Josh soon so we can begin to put all of this pain behind us."

"I'd kill him myself if given the opportunity," Ed almost growled the words out and Olivia knew he was serious.

"I know you would. But, Ed, Charlie needs you with her. Not in jail for murder. So just let the police handle this and you focus on being dad. And also being my amazing other half," she said with a smile, hoping to bring this conversation around on a positive note. He just kept gazing at her, his eyes an ocean of feeling at this point.

"I can't do this without you," he said to her in a whisper as he stroked her cheek.

"You don't ever have to worry about that. I'm yours," she responded and then snuggled back into his chest. Ed pulled her tightly to him, kissing the top of her head, as they just enjoyed being next to each other for the time being. They both knew that life could get heavier before it got better, but they were together and that had to count for something.

* * *

 ** _Just how much longer will Josh stay away, and will he make good of his threat to not care who is in the way? Leave a review to find out what comes next..._**


	22. Chapter 22

_**All I can say is fasten your seatbelts...**_

* * *

"Yo, boss lady, how's it goin'?" Finn came into Olivia's office after fielding a call early that afternoon. He was tired of watching Carisi and Rollins flirt with each other, so he gave himself a break to go check on his friend.

"Well, it would be going better if people would understand what consent means," Olivia said as she looked up at him from behind her reading glasses. But then she broke into a smirk. "I guess that wasn't what you meant?"

"Not really, but I'll take that answer." Finn sat down in one of the chairs in front of Benson's desk and observed her for a bit. "What's the latest on Josh Miller?" Olivia sighed, took off her glasses, and sat back in her chair before answering.

"Nothing new at this point. Charlie seems to be adjusting well living at Ed's place since he is at mine 90% of the time. Gives the girl part of her life back, which has done wonders for her spirit. But they are still keeping patrol cars outside," Olivia's tone was quiet, and Finn couldn't quite make out what that meant. "I know it's good that things have been quiet, but I just want him off the streets so we can breathe easy again."

Finn studied his friend for a while, not saying anything in response. He had watched Olivia change dramatically over the last several years. She had gone from living for the job and her old partner, to being the mom of a little boy and allowing herself to be in a healthy relationship. And now she was essentially living with the dude and adding a daughter to the mix, even if she wasn't technically the mother. Finn saw the look in Olivia's eyes as they spoke about the threat against Charlie, and he would recognize that look anywhere. It was one of a mama bear worried about her cub.

"You know if they are making any progress on finding other witnesses to link him to the flowers?" Finn was pretty much fed up with these Federal Agents. As far as he was concerned, they were crap. Olivia just sighed again and dropped her head into her hands.

"No….Josh Miller is smart. And he's apparently very well connected. You know his kind, overly entitled and thinks he is above the law. So far no one has proven him wrong, and he hasn't made any mistakes yet."

"Yeah he has. He messed with Ed Tucker's daughter. One day, he's gonna slip up. And I want a front row seat to your lover boy letting him have it." Finn said with a knowing smirk and it caused Olivia to look up at him.

"Who says Ed will be the only one going at the bastard?" Olivia said as she raised her eyebrow at Finn.

"Point taken, Lieutenant."

* * *

Back at Ed's apartment, it was nearing 4pm and Charlie was just getting out of the shower. She had somehow caught a cold in the middle of August and was working from home. Or at least, attempting to work from home. After spending about an hour sitting at the kitchen counter, staring at the blinking cursor of her laptop, she gave up and headed to the bathroom. Her hope was that the steamy shower would help wake her up a bit so she could actually get some writing done. It seemed to do the trick, she thought as she pulled on a clean pair of lounge shorts and a big sweatshirt. She opted for her dad's NYPD one because it was super soft. He wouldn't mind. She combed through her hair and pulled it back up into a bun, then made her way back out towards the kitchen and her laptop. But the sight in front of her stopped her dead in her tracks.

"You look surprised to see me," Josh Miller was sitting at the counter, where she had just been working, and smiling at her.

"How did you get in here?" Charlie asked, already breathless from her quickly escalating panic.

"You'd be surprised how distracted a patrol cop can get when he sees a small street fight. Slipped right by him," he said as he stood up and made his way towards Charlie.

"No. Don't come near me," Charlie began to back up but the wall stopped her movement. She was trapped. Josh came towards her with his usual smirk, but stopped just short of where she had ended up.

"We need to have a little chat…" he said, then yanked her arm towards him.

* * *

"Hey, Captain?" One of the IAB Detectives was hurrying into Ed's office with a strained look on his face. Tucker looked up from his laptop and removed his glasses.

"What is it, Davis?"

"Just overheard a radio call from your apartment building. The doorman caught a glimpse of a man entering the elevator that he didn't recognize. Decided to call it in, given the situation with your daughter." Tucker was already out of his chair and reaching for his gun.

"Officers on the way?" He barked his question as he rounded his desk and hurried towards the door.

"Yes, sir," Davis responded, following him through the bullpen of other officers.

"Spinelli, get in touch with Olivia. Davis, you're coming with me." Tucker left no room for discussion as he headed towards the stairwell, skipping the slowness of the elevators, and jogging towards his unmarked cruiser.

* * *

Josh was slowly admiring all the photographs on the shelf of the apartment, touching each one, as Charlie moaned softly from the floor of the hallway with blood running down the side of her face.

"You've been busy since the last time I saw you. Got yourself a little family, huh." He looked over at her as she struggled to remain conscious, and continued to taunt her. "Who is the little boy? Not yours, right? A brother? Nephew? Looks like you love him…"

"Nooooo," Charlie moaned as she began to comprehend what Josh was saying to her.

"You wouldn't want such an innocent little thing caught in the middle of this, would you?" Josh made his way back over to her as she finally sat herself up against the wall, got right up in her face, and wrapped his right hand around her throat. "Because, I'd hate to bring new players into this all because you couldn't keep your mouth shut."

"Leave him alone. Do what you want to me, but leave him alone." Charlie's voice was still soft and full of pain, but her statement was firm.

"Great. Glad to see we are back on the same page," Josh spoke to her as he squeezed her neck a little tighter and smiled as she began to squirm in his grasp. He took a little glee in watching her struggle against him, then let her go before backhanding her. "Until next time…"

Josh took one last look at her, then made his way out of the apartment, leaving an unconscious Charlie behind.

* * *

By the time Tucker and Davis arrived at the building, two NYPD cruisers were already there with one officer was stationed outside while the other three must have been inside. Tucker made no attempt to get briefed as he ran into the lobby of the building. He was about to head for the stairs, when the ding of the elevator caught his attention. He watched as a young man in a hoodie and sunglasses casually exited and began to walk towards the door until he caught a glimpse of Tucker standing there. All of a sudden the figure panicked and took off towards the other way towards the back exit of the lobby. Tucker yelled for the other officers to cut him off in the back alley, as he pulled his gun and ran after him.

"FREEZE" Tucker yelled as he finally got out the door and saw Miller run past the dumpster in the alleyway. Just then, he turned around with his own gun in the air pointing directly at Ed.

"Don't come any closer. I'll shoot!" Josh's voice was all of a sudden full of fear and panic. He was not expecting this turn of events and his mind was racing trying to get out of it. Ed was not scared one bit as he slowly walked towards him, his own gun drawn and pointed at him.

"You're trapped, Miller. Drop the gun." Tucker spoke in a calm growl as he continued to move closer to the bastard that had caused his family so much pain. No way he was letting him out of this.

"I mean it! I'll shoot!" Josh's hand was shaking as he released the safety on the gun. He had already backed himself against the wall of a building, and glanced around as he noticed the other police officers closing in behind Ed.

"It's over. You are not going to torment anyone again. Especially my daughter," Tucker's eyes narrowed as he had an inner fight with himself. No one would blame him if he shot this fucker where he stood. Especially since he had his gun drawn on him. Self-defense, clearly. But he would also take some satisfaction in watching him have to face the consequences of what he had done. Maybe he could just shoot him in the arm. Or leg. Or groin. Enough to cause him pain, but not kill him. Before he could make up his mind, Josh pulled the trigger in an attempt to regain control and hit him in the shoulder as he also fired his gun. Ed grunted and fell backwards, allowing for the other officers to swarm in from behind him.

Tucker was still conscious as he heard the activity around him and felt satisfaction when he heard Josh yelping in pain as he was cuffed and read his rights. He had clearly hit him. Sirens were wailing in the distance, and Ed's thoughts were becoming fuzzy as he watched Davis drop beside him and put pressure on his wound.

"ED!"

He heard a terrified shriek that undoubtedly belonged to Olivia and tried to turn his head as she ran towards him in a panic, dropping to her knees and reaching up to stroke his face and neck.

"Oh my god, Ed. What happened? You're okay. Just stay with me baby," Olivia begged him as tears began to run down her face.

"Liv…Charlie. Where's Charlie?" Ed spoke softly, while breathing through the pain ripping through his shoulder. As glad as he was to have Olivia at his side, he needed to know where Charlie was.

"I…I don't know. I pulled up and heard the shots, so I ran straight back here. Finn went to check on her," Olivia was out of breath and talking quickly.

"Please…go find Charlie. She can't be alone," Ed was begging her, beginning to get upset at the fact that he had no information on his daughter.

"I…I can't leave you," Olivia spoke to him, knowing she should go, but just unable to move. Ed reached his hand up and wiped her tears away.

"I'm fine, I promise. It's just a flesh wound. I need to know if Charlie's okay." As soon as he spoke, the paramedics rushed into the alley with a stretcher and the cops moved to pull Olivia back.

"Ma'am, he will be in good hands," Davis spoke to her softly as she struggled in his grasp. Just then, Finn's voice came through the radio causing Olivia and Ed to listen in horror.

"Call a second bus! Another victim upstairs!"

* * *

 ** _The more reviews, the faster the update is likely to come. They are that motivating. Evil, I know._**


	23. Chapter 23

_**Everyone recovered yet? Sure hope so...**_

* * *

Olivia was sitting in the waiting room of the ER with her head in her hands. She couldn't get over what all had just happened. Ed was okay, but being stitched up so they had kicked her out of his room. The bullet had managed to only hit muscle in his shoulder, so he would be sore and off-duty for a while, but otherwise okay. They had taken Charlie, who still had not woken up, to have scans and X-rays done, and Finn had volunteered to go with her until Olivia could check back in on Ed. Davis and Carisi were still back at the scene, doing who knows what, as the Feds combed the entire building collecting evidence. Rollins had offered to get Noah from Lucy when she finished up at the precinct, as a way of distracting both the young tot and herself as they waited on updates. So Olivia continued to sit there alone, covered in both Ed and Charlie's blood, and flashing back to a couple of hours earlier.

 _"_ _Call a second bus! Another victim upstairs!"_

 _Finn's voice coming over the radio had caused Tucker to start struggling against the paramedics._

 _"_ _Charlie…I have to get to Charlie…" Olivia pushed her way back to him and tried to calm him down._

 _"_ _Ed, you need to get to the hospital. I'm going to go up and be with Charlie, okay? But you won't be any good to her if you keep losing blood." Olivia talked to him sternly, as she noticed he was getting weak from the wound. He finally settled down and allowed the paramedics to move him towards the ambulance, but not before speaking again._

 _"_ _Olivia…make sure she's okay. Don't leave her…."_

 _"_ _I promise. I love you." Olivia kissed his hand hard and watched as they loaded him up. Then she jogged back into the building and up to the 3rd floor. As she walked into the apartment, her fear escalated as she took in the scene. A side table was knocked over, broken glass from a lamp and vase scattered on the floor. Pictures were knocked off the shelves and there were small droplets of blood making a path from the couch back to the hallway where she saw Finn crouched down. She ran back and fell to her knees next to him._

 _"_ _Oh god…is she…" she choked the words out, noticing the girl was pale and had blood caked to her face._

 _"_ _No…no Liv, she's alive. Just knocked out. I've been monitoring her pulse." Finn's voice was calming in his delivery, but it did nothing for Olivia's nerves at this point._

 _"_ _What did he do to her…" she asked quietly, as if Charlie was still able to hear them talk. Olivia's eyes continued to take in the scene. Finn had clearly taken liberties to cover her up, seeing as her sweatshirt was ripped and her shorts were twisted. There were bruises forming all along her jaw and down her neck. So much blood was running down the side of her face that Olivia couldn't tell where the actual wound was._

 _"_ _I don't know….I really don't know. But I hope Ed killed that son of a bitch."_

Now, back in the waiting room and alone, Olivia wondered what they were doing with Josh Miller. She couldn't tell where he'd been hit, but it was apparent Ed had taken a shot at him. She was in no hurry to find out his condition, though. The FBI had assured her that he would be under maximum security while he was being treated in a hospital across the city. In a way, she hoped Finn got his wish and the bastard was dead. She was brought out of her thoughts as the doctor who had been with Charlie approached the waiting area.

"Lieutenant," he said as she stood quickly to shake his hand. "We've finished with Charlie's tests and the nurses are getting her settled in a room right now."

"How is she?" Olivia asked, surprised at the way her voice sounded. It was strained, hoarse, and filled with anxiety.

"She's stable, but unconscious," the doctor said and then took a breathe, looking closely at Olivia. "She sustained a good amount of head trauma and there's some swelling. Nothing alarming and no sign of any damage, but that's likely why she isn't waking up."

"How long will she be out?" Olivia had her heart in her throat at this point and her mind was racing with all the possibilities of what Josh had done to the girl.

"Hard to say. Could wake up in a few hours, or it could be a few days. The important thing is that she's resting which will help her heal."

"Okay…" Olivia's response was almost a squeak as she stumbled back and sat down, her head once again falling into her hands. The doctor gently sat next to her, deciding how to ask his next question.

"Lieutenant, do you have any idea what may have happened before you arrived?" Olivia didn't move her head from it's position resting in her palms, but she still answered.

"I have no idea…but if you need to do an exam, please wait until I'm up there."

* * *

Ed was sitting back on the ER gurney, shirtless with his eyes closed, when Olivia made her way back in to him. The nurse was just putting the final touches on his dressings and adjusting the IV bag that was helping get fluid back in his body. The color was returning in his face, much to Olivia's relief. His eyes opened as he heard her approach the bed and reach for his hand.

"What's the latest on Charlie?" He asked quickly, needing an update at this point as he was going out of his mind with worry. Olivia gave him a small smile before responding.

"She's still out of it. They ran a bunch of tests and everything looks okay for the most part. There's some swelling in her head, likely from some hard hits, but nothing to cause alarm. She will be out of it for a while." Olivia said, trying to sugar coat as much as she thought Ed would allow.

"Where is she? You left her alone?" Ed was asking his questions in a flat but rushed manner, not meaning to sound like he was attacking Liv for being there with him. He just didn't want Charlie to be alone right now.

"She's not alone, Ed. Finn is with her and I will head up as soon as I make sure you are settled here. They are just moving her into a room." Olivia kept eye contact with him and her response was calm, as if she were trying to soothe Noah after a bad dream.

"Did he…?" Ed couldn't even finish the sentence at that point. But Olivia knew what he meant.

"I'm not sure. I told the doctor to wait until I was up there to do any kind of exam like that," Olivia's voice faltered a bit, which did not go unnoticed by the man laying in front of her.

"Liv? What's wrong?" He took her hand and brought it to his lips while he waited for her to answer. She just scoffed a bit and shook her head at his ridiculous question.

"What isn't wrong at this point?" She looked at him with a tired smirk, and that was when he really took in her appearance. Her shirt was covered in blood, hair pulled into a messy ponytail, and her eyes were red and puffy as if she'd been crying for a while.

"Oh baby…" He whispered and pulled her closer to him so they could be nose to nose. "I'm so sorry…."

That was all it took for Olivia to lose control of her emotions and begin to sob, tears streaming down her face, making their way onto Ed's nose and face as well. He adjusted himself so that he could pull her onto the bed to rest on his good shoulder and kissed her head continually.

"It's gonna be okay, Liv. I'm okay and Charlie will be okay. And this will all be over soon…you'll see." Ed immediately pushed his own emotion down as he tried to calm his distraught girlfriend. He couldn't imagine the kind of emotional roller coaster she had just been through.

"I….God, I was so scared. When I saw you laying there…and then Charlie was…I just…" She couldn't finish any of her thoughts as the emotion just took over her entire being. Ed just held her to him as best as he could with an injured shoulder and let her cry. It wasn't often she showed this kind of emotion, so he knew that she must have been terrified. All he could do was hold her tight and whisper little assurances to her.

After about ten minutes, Olivia finally pulled away and went to wipe at her face with the sleeve of her shirt not covered in blood.

"I really need to change clothes," she said as Ed just kept holding her hand, running his fingers along her palm to try and soothe her.

"I'll call the nurse back in and see if she can bring you something," he said as he kept one hand on hers and moved the other one to the call button. Olivia just continued to take deep breaths trying to keep her emotions and remind herself that Ed was alive and okay. That Charlie would be okay eventually. But she just couldn't shake that fear. It was like she finally had the family she dreamed of for her and Noah, and in the course of one hour it was almost ripped away from her.

"I can't live without you," Olivia said as a fresh round of tears made their way down her cheeks. She had never felt this much love for a man in her entire life and today just solidified it for her.

"You'll never have to baby, I promise." He responded as he once again pulled her into his good side and just held her to him, while they waited on the nurse to come with a new shirt.

* * *

 _ **Phew. Poor Olivia, holding down the fort on her own right now. The threat may be over but they haven't even begun to deal with the fallout. When will Charlie wake up? How will Noah react when he learns his "Tar-lie" and "Cap'in" were injured? Leave me a review and let me know what you'd like to see!**_


	24. Chapter 24

**_Make sure to check out the previous chapter, if you haven't already. For some reason the traffic was much lower than usual, and I don't want you to miss anything!_**

 ** _A longer update for you today, as I couldn't find a good place to split it. Enjoy._**

* * *

Ed was sitting quietly by Charlie's bedside, holding her limp hand in both of his and staring at her intently, waiting for her to wake up. After receiving his bag of fluids and pain meds, he finally convinced the doctor to discharge him and wheel him up to Charlie's room so he could be with her and Olivia. The doctor was not overly happy with the idea, but given the man's situation he didn't argue as long as he promised to take it easy. Ed knew that wouldn't be a problem as long as Charlie was in the hospital, because he was not going to leave her side.

Olivia sat with him for a couple of hours, making sure he was okay and fussing around Charlie in an effort to feel like she was helping. Eventually her desire to go see her son outweighed the amount she could fluff a hospital pillow, so she begrudgingly left the duo behind to go snuggle up with Noah. She promised to be back first thing in the morning but instructed Ed to call with any change, even if it was insignificant. She clearly had nothing to worry about because she wasn't gone 10 minutes before he had texted her to check in. Normally that would annoy Olivia, but given what all had happened she happily replied back and continued their conversation into the night.

It was just after midnight when the nurse came to check Charlie's vitals, and noticed Ed was still sitting straight up and watching over the young girl.

"Captain Tucker, why don't get you a roll-away cot so you can rest properly," the nurse said quietly as she recorded numbers on her chart.

"I won't be able to sleep," he responded and then groaned as the pain shot through his shoulder and down his arm. "But, maybe laying down would be good."

"I think it will help. I'll be right back," the nurse smiled and started towards the door. Then turned back around to look at the exhausted officer. "She's going to be okay, Captain."

Ed just picked up Charlie's hand and brought it to his lips to try and fight off the tears that had been building.

"I hope so."

* * *

Olivia was doing something similar, only she was laying in her bed running her finger up and down Noah's cheek as he slept soundly next to her. When she arrived home, the little boy was already asleep. But going to check on him wasn't enough for her, so she scooped him up and brought him into bed with her. He had woken up briefly when she moved him.

"Mommy, you home?" He asked sleepily as he rubbed his eyes.

"Yes baby, I'm right here. You're going to sleep with me in my bed tonight, okay?"

"Otay mommy. Love you." Noah nuzzled his face into her neck as he fell right back asleep.

Now as she laid on her side watching his little chest rise and fall with each breath, she began to get choked up again. What would she have done if Ed had been killed by that bullet? Or if Charlie was dead when she found her with Finn? How would she have explained that to Noah? He was so full of innocence and happiness, and she couldn't get over how close they had come to having their entire lives shattered by one man. Their family may not be legal and official, but that little boy saw Tucker as a father and he loved Charlie as he would a big sister. All the effort she put into not allowing her work to follow her home now that she was a mom, and to keep Noah's life normal and happy, was almost shot to pieces. As she reached up to swipe the tears from her face, her phone vibrated again.

 _Ed: Are you asleep?_

She just laughed at his question, seeing as she had just texted him about ten minutes ago. But the man was a nervous wreck right now and obviously not sleeping himself, so she let it go and responded.

 _Olivia: Wide awake. You should be resting…_

 _Ed: I can't. Not until Charlie wakes up. But the nurse brought me a roll away bed, so I'm at least horizontal._

 _Olivia: Good. How's your pain?_

 _Ed: Tolerable. As long as I don't move._

 _Olivia: Do you want me to come up there so you can go home and rest?_

 _Ed: No. I'm not leaving. I also can't get back into my apartment, so might as well stay here._

They continued to talk back and forth about very little, but just the idea that they were both awake and communicating was enough comfort to keep them going. Eventually, though, Ed stopped responding and Olivia assumed the pain medicine had finally knocked him out. Good, she thought. He needs his strength. But now she was feeling lonely and more emotional, so she just focused her eyes and thoughts on her little boy as she reminded herself that everyone was alive. And maybe they weren't okay, but they would be eventually.

* * *

The sun began to shine through the hospital window as Ed went to stretch and yelped in pain. He had clearly forgotten his injury in his slumber, and was now paying for the attempt at movement. His cry must have been loud because a new nurse came rushing in a few seconds later to check.

"Everything okay in here, Captain Tucker?" she asked as she went to his side and checked his bandage.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine." He grumbled at her as he attempted to push away her hands. "Just tried to stretch, forgetting I had a bullet in my shoulder."

"You should really be more careful," she said as if she were a mother talking to her stubborn son.

"Did Charlie wake up while I was out of it?" Tucker ignored her advice and sat up, looking over at his still sleeping daughter.

"No, she hasn't budged. But there's nothing to worry about. It hasn't even been 24 hours. She will wake up when she's ready."

"Knowing what that bastard may have done to her, she may never be ready to wake up. That's my biggest fear," Tucker didn't realize he had voiced that thought out loud until he noticed the nurse giving him a look of pity. He hated pity. So he just changed the subject.

"Any chance you could sneak me a good cup of coffee?"

The nurse winked at him and gave a little nod as she scurried out of the room. Ed sighed heavily and slowly moved himself from the cot to the wheelchair that was still sitting by Charlie's bed. He moved his good arm up to stroke her cheek and began to speak softly to her.

"Hey Charlie. You're okay. Josh is in police custody, and likely in a fair amount of pain. I accidentally shot him. Okay, it wasn't accidentally. I meant to shoot him. He's done messing with you - for good this time," his hand stilled, cupping her cheek as he continued to gaze at her. "I don't know what he did to you this time around, but I promise you that if you will just open your eyes I will help you deal with whatever it is. You aren't alone. I'm here. Olivia is on her way back. Noah will be waiting for you with Peter Pan in hand. Finn is still parked out in the waiting room, just daring anyone other than Olivia and I to try and access your room. We love you and need you to wake up, okay? Please."

Ed moved his hand back down to grab hers and give it a squeeze, then sat back and kept a watchful eye on her movements. He must have been sat like that for about an hour, because the next thing he knew there was a knock on the door and Olivia strolled in carrying a brown bag and two cups of coffee. She looked like she hadn't slept a wink overnight, but to Ed she was breathtaking. As she got settled next to him, she noticed him staring.

"What?" She asked as she handed him what he assumed was a toasted bagel.

"I just love you. That's all." He responded and leaned towards her for a kiss. She happily obliged and their lips met in a hungry, albeit brief, kiss. He was about to say something when his phone began to ring.

"Tucker" he spoke harshly, a little upset that work was calling him in the middle of a family crisis. But his face immediately stiffened as he listened to the voice on the other end.

"Yes, I understand. But can't it wait until my daughter wakes up?"

At that statement, Olivia's attention peaked and she looked at him curiously.

"No, no I understand. Yes, I'd appreciate it if you could come to me. Okay, see you then." Tucker ended the call and let out a small curse as he hung his head a bit.

"That your chief?" Olivia asked, assuming that was what had him this upset.

"Yeah. They need my statement sooner rather than later, so I told them to come here and they could get it." He spoke, but his eyes were back on Charlie. "I understand the whole 'officer involved shooting' thing, but I just don't want to leave her even for a second…"

"Ed, it was a clean shoot. And every witness will back that up. So just give your statement and you'll be back here with us in no time." Olivia ran her hand through his short hair as she spoke to him, and he finally turned to look at her.

"I wish to God I would have killed him," Ed said.

"I know you do," Olivia responded. "But maybe don't tell that to Chief Nichols."

Ed just grunted in agreement and they settled into a comfortable silence, hand in hand, watching Charlie for any sign she was ready to wake up.

* * *

The nurse had just left after taking mid-morning vitals and Ed was beginning to get antsy in anticipation of giving his statement. So he was trying to distract himself.

"Where's Noah?" He asked as he fidgeted with the ice bucket the nurse left in the room.

"Lucy is at home with him. He was pretty clingy this morning, so he senses something is wrong. I wanted the day to be as normal as possible for him. She's going to take him to his music class this morning and then hopefully I can check in on him around lunchtime."

"That's good. He's a little champ," his tone was that of admiration. Olivia knew that Ed loved her son as if he were his own, but sometimes he took her breath away with the look he got in his eyes when he spoke of him. This hard-assed IAB Captain was probably the most compassionate, caring and loving man she had ever known. Just then the door opened and in walked Chief Nichols with one of his little minions.

"Captain Tucker, any change?" He asked shortly, trying to get the pleasantries out of the way and down to business.

"No sir. Still waiting," he responded, just as shortly and took a deep breath in preparation for what was to come.

"Well, let's not beat around the bush. The nurse has opened up a conference room for us to get your statement. You need some help?" Just then, the nurse returned and gave Chief Nichols a glare as she went up to Ed. He liked this nurse.

"I'll get you settled down in the room. I also have that cup of coffee waiting for you," she said with a wink and a smile, then she turned to Olivia.

"Don't worry ma'am, I'll keep an eye on your husband." Before Olivia could respond and correct her, they were gone from the room and she was left with her own thoughts.

 _Husband…I like the sound of that_ , her thoughts surprised her. Normally she freaks out at the mention of this kind of thing. But she didn't have too much time to dwell on it, as she heard a painful moan escape Charlie's lips. She jumped up from her chair and was leaning over the girl in record time.

"Charlie? It's Olivia. Can you hear me?" She spoke softly into her ear, as she squeezed her hand and willed the girl to try and open her eyes. After a few more painful noises, Charlie finally blinked her eyes open.

"Ah…Liv…ia…" her voice was a whisper, but it was still the best sound Olivia had ever heard. She immediately started kissing the girl's forehead as a few tears made their way down her cheek.

"Yes baby, it's Olivia. I'm right here. You're okay."

"What..." Charlie's breathing was labored and her words were a mere whisper, but Olivia could tell she was already getting worked up.

"Hey Charlie, you're okay. Don't try to talk right now. Just breath and focus your eyes on me," Olivia was holding Charlie's face in her hands, trying to get her eyes looking straight at her.

"Josh...oh God..." Charlie's breathing was getting shallow as Olivia watched her inner panic take over. She again moved her face so they were forehead to forehead, trying to ground her a bit.

"Josh isn't here. He's with the police across town. He's not getting away this time. It's just you and me, okay? No one else. Just you and me, baby."

"Olivia..." Her eyes began to settle on Olivia's face, finally realizing where she was. "Noah?"

"He's just fine. Lucy took him to his music class." Olivia was a little puzzled as to why she was asking about Noah, but shrugged it off just figuring she needed assurance about everything. But then she saw the sudden relief come across her face and began to worry there was more to this.

"Dad?"

"He's answering some questions with the officers right now, sweetie. He should be back soon." She answered and then paused unsure of whether she should go ahead and tell Charlie her dad was injured. She decided to wait and buzzed the nurse instead so they could come check on her. "I'm just going to let the nurse know you are awake, okay?"

"Don't go..." The words still came out in a whisper, but Olivia could hear the desperation in her tone.

"I'm just hitting the buzzer, okay? I'm not going anywhere." Charlie just continued to gaze at Olivia, so she stayed right where she was hoping the girl could take comfort in her presence. The nurse came hustling in, startling both women just a little bit.

"Hi there, Charlotte. I'm Mary...how are you feeling?" The nurse asked as she started marking her vitals and checking the IV bag.

"Headache..." Charlie whispered hoarsely. "Also tired."

"That's to be expected. You've been through quite a bit." The nurse finally stopped fidgeting and gave her a soft smile. "The doctor is going to be in shortly to talk with you and assess how you are doing, okay? In the meantime, maybe munch on some ice chips and I'll be right back."

Charlie followed the nurse with her eyes as she left the room, and then closed them again letting out a little sigh.

"Charlie?" Olivia panicked a bit as she watched the girl drift off again. But Charlie slowly opened her eyes hearing the tone of her voice.

"Sorry, Liv. The light hurts my head..." Olivia reached up to switch off the lamp above her bed.

"Better?"

"Yeah, thanks." The girl kept her eyes on Olivia's face, but didn't say much.

"Charlie, can you tell me what happened?" Olivia was a little hesitant to ask, but she needed to know if the girl remembered anything that would be of immediate use to the officers. Or Ed as he dealt with the cranky IAB Chief. But Charlie got a look of pure terror on her face as soon as she asked the question.

"I can't..." She whispered, but squeezed Olivia's hand tighter.

"Because you can't remember? Or he threatened you?" Charlie remained silent, so Olivia continued. "Josh is in police custody. He cannot hurt you or anyone else if you talk to me, okay?"

"I've heard that line before. And now I'm in a hospital bed." Charlie said, taking no chances. She didn't trust anyone at this point and Josh hadn't just threatened her, he had threatened Noah. Olivia took a deep breath, trying to figure out what to say next.

"Okay, you don't have to tell me that right now," deciding a compromise was best, Olivia went in with a different angle. "But can you tell me if he raped you again?"

Charlie's eyes began to water and her lip began to quiver as she just looked at Olivia for a while, not moving.

"Please talk to me, sweetie," Olivia begged her to open up but to no avail.

"You don't understand...it's all my fault."

"It's not your fault, Charlie. It is not your fault. Help me understand..."

"He didn't just threaten me this time," her voice was still soft, but Olivia heard her clearly. "He threatened Noah, too."

* * *

 _ **Up Next: Ed finds himself in some hot water with Chief Nichols; Olivia reacts to Charlie's admission that Noah was threatened.**_

 ** _A/N: With several chapters left in the story, I'm coming to a crossroad of sorts. Leave a review and let me know some of the things you'd like to see happen before we reach the end!_**


	25. Chapter 25

_**We still have a lot to flesh out in this story, so let's just get down to business...**_

* * *

"I'm sorry, Olivia. I'm so sorry." Charlie whispered over and over as she watched Olivia speak with Amanda. As soon as she heard that Josh had threatened her son, a look of fear came over her face and she reached for her phone. Keeping a tight hold of Charlie with one hand, Olivia quickly dialed Rollins, asking her to go get Noah and bring him to the hospital. Rollins seemed surprised at the request.

"Are you sure you want him at the hospital, Liv?" She questioned before offering to just stay at the apartment with him.

"Yeah, I just want him with me. I'll explain everything when you get here." Liv spoke to her then hung up the phone, turning her attention back to the distraught young woman in front of her and noticed that she wouldn't even make eye contact.

"This is not your fault, okay? It's just not. Amanda will bring Noah here, and we can see for ourselves that he is fine." Olivia was still taking some deep breaths, knowing deep down that with Josh in custody there was no real threat.

"I don't want to scare him…he's so little…" Charlie winced as she tried to speak and closed her eyes again. "Ow."

"What hurts, baby?" Olivia leaned in close to her, rubbing up and down her arm to try and soothe her.

"My head," she said, keeping her eyes closed and trying to breath through the pain.

"The doctor should be here soon, but let me buzz out to the nurse and see if we can hurry it up."

"Olivia?" Her eyes were still closed as she called the older woman.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you…"

"You don't have to thank me, Charlie. This is what family is for."

* * *

"Listen, Ed," Chief Nichols removed his glasses and leaned forward after hearing Tucker's version of the events and turning off the recording device. "Mr. Miller is a very well connected son of a bitch. You, more than anyone, should want us to do everything we can to keep him locked up. That being said, I've already got lawyers on my voicemail asking why the father of Miller's accuser was the one who fired the shot. I'm not in a good position here."

"Do whatever you want to me," Ed said without flinching. "Do not let him walk."

"We don't intend to. I'm going to place you on paid leave as of now. Basically, it gives you full pay/benefits while you recover, as well as hopefully not giving Miller's lawyers a foot in the door to his acquittal. Once all of this blows over, we'll reassess what to do. Now get back to your daughter. Focus on your family, Captain. They need you."

The Chief and his companion stood up, and nodded to Tucker as they left the room. He continued sitting there for a bit, trying to wrap his mind around what just happened. Clearly, they believed him. Chief Nichols was not known to sugar coat things. So he felt good knowing that they all wanted Charlie to get justice, whatever that meant at this point. He even made reference to "his family", meaning that the Chief understood and respected his commitment to Olivia, Noah, and Charlie. As he sat there to collect his thoughts and sip his coffee, Ed made a decision; he would gladly turn in his papers if it meant Josh Miller rotting in prison.

* * *

Charlie had been taken back for more scans, since she was now awake, and Olivia was left sitting outside of the room waiting on her boys to join her. She didn't have to wait long until she saw Ed slowly making his way down the hallway, arm still in a sling. She jumped up and went to him so she could help him back to their seats.

"How did it go?" She asked once they were settled next to each other in the uncomfortable hallway chairs. Ed just grunted.

"I'm on paid leave." He stared straight ahead as he spoke, but his hand clutched hers tightly.

"It was a clean shot…" Olivia felt like they just couldn't catch a break.

"They know that. But Miller's lawyers are already trying to use the fact that Charlie is my daughter to protest the shooting. I told them not to take any chances with her case, and that if I needed to hand in my badge I would."

"Ed…"

He finally tuned to look at her, and Olivia saw that as tired as he was, his head was clear. And he was at peace with whatever happened, professionally.

"How's she doing," he asked.

"She's in a lot of pain, but she seems to be with it. Not talking much…" Olivia trailed off a bit, but then took a breath to catch Ed up. "She hasn't told me what happened, other than the fact that the bastard threatened her with Noah. I called Rollins to go get Noah and bring him here. I'll feel better once he's in my arms and I think once Charlie sees that he is okay, she will tell us more." As she finished up, she noticed Ed was just staring at her with this look she couldn't quite pinpoint.

"She's awake?" He asked in a whisper, and that was when Olivia realized he didn't even know she had woken up.

"She is. I was right there with her, but she is a mess." Olivia spoke, trying to warn him not to go in with a thousand questions. "We are going to need to be patient with her."

"Of course. Honestly, I just want to see her awake. And get her discharged so we can all go home and just be together."

"Me too...me too." Liv responded and stroked his arm as they sat in silence for a bit.

"I don't even know what to think right now Liv," Tucker admitted.

"Numb seems to be working for me at this point."

"Do you think I need to call Charlie's mom?" He asked, giving away that he had been stewing about it but was not sure the right course of action.

"Would you be able to have a civil conversation with her?" Olivia asked, because she felt like she would strangle the woman. And if she felt like that, there was no telling how Ed felt.

"I honestly don't know. But I don't feel right keeping her in the dark about this. I still don't even know what happened between her and Charlie." As Ed spoke, his eyes drifted shut. This was just too much to deal with. And Olivia felt the same. Everything was crashing down around them and they were helpless to stop it.

"I think we wait. When Charlie is able to handle that question, we'll ask her. And if she wants her mom called then we will do it." Olivia was firm in her answer, but her voice was tired.

"Okay, whatever you say," Ed responded, then turned to look at her. "Hey...I love you."

Olivia just smiled at him.

"I love you too."

* * *

"Oh my god, what happened?" Charlie's eyes were wide as Ed slowly made his way into her room. Olivia cursed under her breath, angry at herself for neglecting to give Tucker a head's up about his daughter not knowing what happened. His eyes got wide as he also realized she had no idea he had been shot and now he stood in front of her with his arm in a sling, looking like hell.

"I'm fine, sweetheart. Just a flesh wound," he said, almost dismissively at first, and made his way to the chair next to her bed. "I'm more worried about you. How are you feeling?"

Charlie didn't say anything in response. She just kept looking him with a foggy, skeptical look. So Ed glanced at Olivia, who was standing behind him with her arms wrapped around herself, to try and get an idea of what to say. But Charlie beat them to it.

"I can't deal with secrets right now." With her voice being as shaky as it was, Ed was nervous to let her know what happened. But he had no choice.

"Charlie, I ran into Josh Miller as he was leaving our apartment building," he kept eye contact as her fear began to escalate. "He recognized me, took off into the alley, and I followed him. He pulled his gun, so I pulled mine and we both ending up firing at the same time." Charlie gasped as tears began to roll down her cheeks.

"Daddy..."

"Hey, I'm okay. Already discharged and just a few stitches," Ed rushed to reassure her and grabbed her hand, kissing it as he spoke. "The bullet hit Josh in his thigh, and sliced through an artery. He's in a maximum security hospital uptown. So he's never, ever going to hurt you again."

"He shot you?" Charlie stuttered as the tears just streamed down her face and her sobs got harder. Olivia got worried that she was too worked up, so she went to sit on the opposite side of her bed and took her other hand.

"Charlie, just take deep breaths. Everyone is okay. We are all right here. Noah's on his way. Your dad is just fine. That's what is important here, okay?"

"No!" She yelled between the sobs. "None of this is okay! It's not just me he's hurting now. I can't take it anymore!"

Ed's heart broke into a thousand pieces, but he had to figure out how to calm her down. Being this upset after sustaining a head injury couldn't be good. So he stood up slowly, reaching out to stroke her hair and her face, and making sure to keep eye contact.

"Charlie, look at me," his voice was soft and calm, despite how he felt on the inside. "I am fine. I am just fine. But I need you to calm down, okay? Take some deep breaths."

Charlie, despite her tears, tried to listen to her father and took some breaths. So Ed continued to talk her through this.

"That's good. Just keep taking those deep breaths. Noah will be here soon, and he doesn't need to see all of us hysterical." He was speaking to Charlie, but really that comment was for all three of them. They needed to pull it together if they expected a three year old to handle being in a hospital room with them. Just then, Olivia's phone buzzed.

"Speaking of Noah," she said as the fired off a response via text. "Amanda is downstairs so I'll go meet them. Try to prep him."

Once Olivia had departed, Charlie took a long, deep breath and closed her eyes for a bit. Ed just watched in amazement as she somehow pulled herself together, in the midst of all of her pain. He was pretty sure his daughter would do anything for Noah. It didn't take the little boy long to wrap adults around his finger, but he seemed to have a special bond with Charlie. And that bond was likely just as good for her as it was for him. Charlie seemed to have calmed down a bit, and Ed didn't want to risk saying anything to rock the boat. So he just sat on her bed, still holding her hand, while they waiting on Olivia to return with Noah.

"Do they really have him? He can't get to us?" Charlie asked quietly and without making eye contact. She needed that reassurance, and would likely continue to need it for some time.

"He cannot get to us," Ed confirmed. "Charlie, you have every reason not to trust law enforcement right now. But that bastard he pulled a gun on an entire group of officers. Including a captain. He's not getting away this time."

Charlie nodded and decided that she was too overwhelmed at this point to question it. She was just going to trust her dad. Luckily, there wasn't too much dwelling time because Olivia re-entered slowly with Noah on her hip. The little boy looked unsure of the situation and was cluching a big stuffed dog that Ed didn't recognize. Olivia had a little smile on her face and softly spoke to Noah as they moved closer to the bed. Noah kept his face buried until they sat down in the rocker next to Charlie's bed.

"Hey, pal. I'm so glad you came to see me." Charlie spoke softly, but there was a light in her eyes as she looked at the little boy. He immediately looked up and took in his friend, seeing some of the bruises.

"Tar-lie, boo boo?"

"Yeah, I have some boo boos."

"You hurt?" He asked, trying to make sure that his friend was okay.

"A little, but I'm better now that you are here!" She reached out her arm and poked his little nose, eliciting a giggle. That did the trick to get him comfortable in the situation, so he turned around and hauled the large, golden stuffie into his lap.

"I buy-ed this for you. He soft and have big ears. He make you feel better." Noah spoke and tried to hand her the dog, but it was a little too big for him to handle so Olivia helped out. Charlie admired the stuffie that was now sitting on her stomach and looked to Noah with a smile.

"I love him, Noah. Thank you so much. He will defintiely make me better," Noah smiled happily, satisfied that his gift had worked. "What should we name him?"

"Hmmm" Noah's face went into his thoughtful pucker.

"How about Snickers?" Charlie asked, while smirking a bit at Noah. The boy just giggled and nodded. Charlie had snuck the little boy a snickers one day when she came over, and he's been hooked ever since. It was their little secret, that wasn't really a secret.

"Yesssss! That a good name," Noah replied, then he looked up as his mom with a coniving look. "You get us choc-lat to make Tar-lie better?"

Olivia just laughed as she stood up and gently placed the boy on the bed. He immediately snuggled into Charlie and Snickers, and the girl snuck him a little high-five for his effort. Ed just rolled his eyes at the two of them.

"It's nice to know some things will never change."

* * *

 _ **Up Next: Charlie continues to recover, Noah plays doctor, & Oliva and Ed come up with a temporary way to help their little family cope.**_


	26. Chapter 26

_**I know you all are used to a chapter a day, but that won't always be the case. Don't fret! I'll try to make each chapter worth the wait...**_

* * *

"Here Tar-lie," Noah said as he gently placed his race-car ice pack on her jaw. "This make it hurt less."

"Thanks, pal." She mumbled as best she could, given his arm was covering her mouth in his attempt to hold the ice on. He then settled onto the day bed with her and stroked at Snickers' ears.

"Tar-lie?"

"Yeah?"

"How you get hurt?" He asked and looked up at her with wide eyes. Charlie swallowed hard, unsure of how to answer this question. After a little thought, she went with a three year old version of the truth.

"A bad man hurt me. But Captain made sure he wouldn't ever hurt anyone again," she said as she stroked his little cheek and watched him try to process. After a couple of minutes, he seemed to accept the answer.

"Cap'in good. He protect us." Noah said confidently, as if he wasn't surprised that his Cap'in had fixed the problem. The boy went back to stroking the big floppy ears of their new stuffie as he kept thinking. "You sad, Tar-lie?"

"Yeah, I'm a little sad pal," Charlie answered thoughtfully, but then looked down at him with a smile. "But you make me happy!"

Noah just got a big grin on his face and sat up.

"I always be here when you sad, Tar-lie. It be my job." Noah said, matter-of-factly. Charlie got a little teary eyed at just how loved Noah made her feel, but quickly pushed the emotion down.

"You are very good at your job. And I'll always be here for you too, okay pal?" She said and lifted her arm back up so he could snuggle in. Charlie propped her laptop up on the night stand and hit play on Peter Pan.

Meanwhile, Olivia was sitting at her dining room table doing some research on possible getaways and listening to their conversation. She couldn't quite nail down the emotion she felt when Charlie and Noah were together. It was a beautiful thing, almost as if they were perfectly placed in each other's lives. Noah so needed that older sibling to love on him and spoil him. But Olivia was also convinced that Noah had some kind of deep understanding that Charlie needed to be loved on a little extra. And he was able to do so in the most adorable way. He had clearly made it his mission to make sure his Charlie was okay.

"Mommy?" Noah yelled from his spot next to Charlie, so Olivia made her way into the little alcove. "I have juice?"

"Sure, baby. I'll get your cup."

"Tar-lie need juice too so she get better," he informed her and Olivia looked to Charlie for confirmation that she wanted something to drink.

"Do you want more Sprite?"

"Yeah, thanks Olivia. It tastes really good." Charlie responded quietly, feeling a little weird about Olivia waiting on her. But she was really too sore to move around much. Olivia quickly put her thoughts at ease by winking as she grabbed her cup and headed towards the kitchen.

"Tar-lie, mommy a police officer too. Like Cap'in. But she Loo-tint," he said, clearly having been told their titles enough that he could somewhat recite it back to people. "She keep the bad man away too, otay?"

"Okay, pal. Sounds like a plan."

* * *

"Hey dad?" Charlie slowly made her way to the door of Olivia's bedroom, where Ed was reading on his iPad. He looked up as he heard Charlie call for him.

"Hey, what are you doing out of bed?" He said, immediately putting his iPad down and taking his glasses off.

"I needed to move a bit," she said as she slowly walked towards the bed, holding the stuffed dog against her ribs. "Do you mind if I sit in here with you for a little bit? Noah fell asleep on my bed."

"I'd love that," Ed responded and watched her carefully as she went to get settled. He added one more pillow behind her back, which seemed to get her as comfortable as she could be.

"How are you, kiddo?"

"I don't know…" Charlie responded honestly. "I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel."

Tucker looked at her face and could see the exhaustion and confusion in her eyes. He couldn't blame her. She'd been running from this asshole for years. There's not a person on the planet who would know how to feel. So he took a hold of her hand as they laid side by side, propped up on Olivia's queen sized bed.

"I don't think there's a certain way you are supposed to feel here, Charlie." Tucker stated softly, hoping whatever he said would be okay. "You've been through a lot."

"Yeah..." She responded as she let out an exhale.

"Do you want me to call your mom? Do you think that would help you?" Tucker asked as he ran his thumb over the top of her hand, hoping to soothe her a little bit.

"No," Charlie just shook her head slowly, then immediately regretted the movement and winced.

"What's wrong?"

"I probably shouldn't move my head like that," she admitted, then continued on to explain her answer. "Calling mom isn't going to help. She won't care."

"Now isn't the time for me to ask what happened between you two, but I do feel like I should call and let her know that you were in the hospital." Ed said it cautiously.

"Okay. I just...I don't want to talk to her."

"Fair enough. You want to sit here while I call?"

"No, will you her call later? I just want to spend time with my dad right now." Tucker's heart swelled when he heard those words come from his daughter. He smiled as he leaned over to lightly kiss her temple, careful of the bruises. They returned to a comfortable silence, though Ed had still not let go of her hand. Finally he got the courage to try and get her to talk about what happened during this last attack.

"I know you aren't wanting to talk to the police about what Josh did this time around. But do you think you can talk to me about it?" He asked her quietly. As hard as it would be to hear, Ed wanted to make sure that she knew he was with her 100%. "It will stay within the walls of this room for as long as you want it to. Just...will you talk to someone? Me...or Liv...or..."

"A shrink?" She asked, somewhat emotionless and without looking up from where her gaze was fixed on the stuffed dog in her lap. Ed just eyed her.

"If that's what you'd prefer, yes, but I'm not going to force you into therapy. I want you to make your own decisions here, okay? I just wish you would talk to us..." Ed and Olivia had spoken at length about whether they should just make Charlie an appointment with a therapist or not. Ed was beside himself that she wouldn't talk to anyone, but Olivia remained firm in her stance that she needed to make decisions for herself. It was important for her healing process that she be allowed to control the entire situation. He reluctantly got on board, but he didn't have to like it. Lucky for Ed, Charlie threw him a bone.

"He didn't...you know..." she spoke softly, but loud enough for Ed to hear. He just closed his eyes and squeezed her hand in relief. He wasn't sure if he would've been able to live with himself if Josh had raped his daughter again, after he spent months promising to protect her. It was obvious that she was traumatized from the confrontation, but the fact that she didn't have that devastation to deal with lifted a weight off of Ed's conscience.

"He smacked me around a lot. Taunted me about not really having a family. Said this was all pretend. Threatened Noah. I saw he had a gun with him. So I just stayed still and quiet. Even when he hit me." She was looking straight ahead as she spoke, but she kept her hand in Ed's. "I kept thinking that maybe…if he would just kill me…then he wouldn't hurt Noah. Or you. Or Olivia. I was so mad at myself for bringing you all into this. And I'll never forgive myself for the fact that he shot you…."

Her tears overflowed from her eyes at that point and she dropped her head down, almost as if she was ashamed at what had happened. Ed was stoic, not letting his emotion show, as he moved his hand up to her chin and turned her to face him. He looked into her watery eyes as he spoke to her.

"Charlie, this is not your fault. This is Josh's fault. He did this. No one else. Olivia and I, we wanted to get involved. We want to help you. I would take a thousand bullets if it meant that bastard would never hurt you again. I'm just…so thankful that you are alive, sitting here with me, and talking to me."

They sat there for a little while, father and daughter, just looking at each other. Charlie still had tears streaming down her face, but Ed remained a rock for her. Neither one of them knew what to say or do next, but they also didn't want to leave that moment. Finally, he continued on.

"Sweetheart, Josh is never going to see daylight again. It's over. He can't get to you, or anyone else. All you have to focus on now is healing. Physically and all other ways. And I promise you that Olivia and I…and Noah…will be right here, beside you, every step of the way."

Charlie slowly moved her hand to lightly brush over the bandage on Tucker's shoulder. Her breathes were harsh and uneven, as she fought the tears that were threatening to overwhelm her entire being yet again.

"I'm so sorry, daddy. I love you."

"I love you too. It's going to be okay."

* * *

Later that night, Olivia made her way out of the bathroom and was surprised to see that her bed was empty. She expected to see Ed settled in or even asleep already, as she had been in the bath for almost an hour pruning away the stress of the last few days. Thinking he likely went to get some water, she sat on the bed and rubbed lotion into her arms and legs. When Ed still hadn't returned five minutes later, she went to look for him. As soon as she got to the bedroom door, she saw him sitting on an ottoman next to Charlie's bed. The girl was out cold while Ed held her hand and hung his head. Olivia approached them slowly and put her hand on his shoulder.

"Ed?" She spoke his name softly, but he never raised his head as he responded.

"He didn't rape her this time," his voice was low and gruff, thick with emotion and exhaustion. Olivia squeezed his shoulder tightly and let out an exhale. "I just…he put her through hell, and I feel terrible for being so relieved….but I can't help it."

"I'm relieved too, babe." Olivia admitted to him, hoping it would ease his worry. "There's no way the position you are in feels good to your injured shoulder. Come on, let's go to bed."

Ed still remained frozen in place. The only sign of movement was the rise and fall of his shoulders with each breath he took. Olivia just kept her eyes on the top of his head, trying to figure out how to help him in that moment.

"What do we do next, Liv? How do we help her? How do we navigate this?" Ed was not a man to ask for help, but he was at a loss here. There was no one he trusted more in the world that Olivia Benson, and she knew that.

"We start by getting some sleep, allowing your body to heal." She paused for a bit, before continuing. "Then we take it step by step. We stick together. Face each day together."

Ed finally moved his head so he could look at his girlfriend. Her beauty ran deeper than he thought was possible, and as she stood over him in her pajamas and no makeup, he couldn't help but thank God she was his.

"Thank you. Thank you for being here through this." Olivia just smiled at him as he spoke to her.

"Don't thank me for this. I love you. I love our family."

"Still…"

"Come on, let's get to bed and I'll show you the cabin I booked for us earlier today." Olivia smirked as she helped Ed stand up and he gave her a surprised glance.

"Cabin? Where? When?" He took both of her hands in his as he asked her one worded questions.

"Yes, a cabin. Up at Lake George. For all four of us to get away. And thanks for Finn, we can stay there for 2…whole…..weeks." She kissed him between each of the last three words she spoke, and then watched as his eyes finally got their sparkle back.

"You, Olivia Benson, are amazing. And I love you so much."

"I love you, too. Now really, let's go to bed."

* * *

 ** _Up Next: Our favorite family gets settled in at Lake George. Don't forget to leave a review!_**


	27. Chapter 27

_**Lake George, Part I**_

* * *

"No, Noah, come bring your backpack in here," Olivia called to the boy, who was making his way into Charlie's room.

"No, mommy. I stay in room with Tar-lie," he said, without even turning his head. The boy was determined.

"Noah Benson, stop right there." Olivia used her warning voice, which was a rare thing in the Benson household. Noah was a very well behaved child, and he was now frozen mid-step. Olivia made her way over to him and crouched down, stroking his little cheek as she spoke to him. "Charlie needs to have a little space, okay?"

Noah looked crestfallen at the idea that he was not allowed to stay in a room with Charlie. But just then, the girl made her way slowly out of the room she claimed as hers and smiled at the boy.

"Hey pal, I have an idea," she began and his face immediately lit up as he looked at her. "How about you put your stuff in the room mommy asked you to, but then you come in here and help me unpack?"

"No sleep in you room?" He asked with his usual wide eyes. Charlie's heart melted a little bit, and looked to Olivia who nodded at her to communicate that it was her call.

"Maybe not all the time, but do you think you could sleep in here tonight since it's our first night?" Charlie asked him and he nodded vigorously.

"Yes. That good plan," he said, then turned to go put his backpack where his mom had asked so he could return to help Charlie unpack. As he walked away, Olivia turned to look at Charlie and gave her a smile.

"You are so good to him. But don't feel like you have to accommodate his every request. He would stay glued to your side if given the opportunity."

"It's okay, Olivia. I sorta like it," Charlie admitted sheepishly. Olivia walked forward to play with the girl's long ponytail and reassure her.

"Don't feel embarrassed about that. Noah is basically the best therapy around," she said and then stood back a bit and gave her another smile. "Once you're unpacked and settled, come on out to the porch. I'll make us a cold drink and we can take in our view for the next couple of weeks."

* * *

Several hours later, Ed and Olivia were sitting next to each other in lounge chairs on their cabin's porch. The cabin was situated about a hundred yards from the shore of the lake, and across that lake was a view of the mountains. It was breathtaking, and just what they needed to try and recover from what life had thrown at them in the last six months. Given that it was the end of the summer months, the area was also quiet and serene. Its perfect, thought Olivia.

Ed had been uncharacteristically quiet, though, the entire ride up to Lake George. Olivia knew he had made a call to Lisa, his ex wife, before they left. She assumed that whatever happened on that call was the reason for his brooding, and she was done letting him pout. With Noah down for a nap and Charlie on the phone with work, now seemed like a good time to bring it up.

"Ed, what happened when you spoke with Charlie's mom?" She asked, not looking at him, but her tone was firm enough to convey the message that he wasn't getting off the hook. He let out a sigh as he thought about what to say.

"Nothing," he said with more disdain in his voice than Olivia had ever heard. "It was like she was annoyed that I even thought to call her with the news."

Olivia turned to look at him, but didn't say anything in response. She wanted him to keep talking, because he was clearly angry. He needed to deal with that before talking with Charlie, if that was his plan. She squeezed his hand to encourage him to continue.

"First she acted surprised that I even had contact with Charlie, saying that I never had the time before." As Ed continued to talk, Olivia's blood pressure rose with each statement. "Then she went on to say how she was surprised that I, as a police officer, didn't see the embellishment Charlie made when telling the story. Liv, even her own mother didn't believe her."

"You think it's self-protection? A form of denial?" Olivia asked, not comprehending how a mother could turn her back on her child during a time like that.

"Maybe. I don't know. She also just wasn't interested in knowing anything else. When I told her she had been raped again, then put in the hospital in a later attack, Lisa just cut me off and said 'what is it that you want me to do'. I just…" His voice trailed off and he shook his head. Olivia noticed his face had turned a deeper shade of red as he fought to control his anger. "I could tell she was distracted, and wanted off the phone."

"Ed…" Olivia said, with her heart breaking at what was going on, both with him and also with Charlie.

"How could she abandon our baby girl like that?" He asked, with a strained emotion to it, not noticing that Charlie was standing just on the other side of the screen door listening to the conversation. "Its like, to Lisa, she doesn't exist anymore. She doesn't want to think about her, let alone talk to her or help her. And I just…she needs her mom, Olivia. With all of this shit going on, my daughter needs a mother."

Liv just kept looking at him as he spoke. She wanted to say so many things, but also didn't want to step on any toes. Ed had stepped in to be a father to her little boy, and she could do that for Charlie. If that is what they both wanted. But she wasn't sure how to bring that up. So instead, she just let him keep talking and waited for the right moment.

"Do I really have any right to be upset with her? I mean, Charlie was basically abandoned by both of her parents. And she's paid a high price for our mistakes."

"Ed, you have to stop beating yourself up. Yes, you made mistakes in the past. Yes it sucked for Charlie. But you won't be any good to her now if you keep dwelling on that. She's here. She's with us. She needs us," Olivia spoke, trying to once again knock some sense into the man. "Baby, you didn't know what was going on down in Florida. Lisa never made that phone call to you, like you did today. I know you. And if you had any idea what your daughter was going through, you would've been there."

"I know that, Liv," Ed said. "I know that and you know that. But Charlie doesn't. To her, I just wasn't there when she needed me."

"That's not true." Charlie spoke up and startled both adults. She slowly made her way out onto the porch and Olivia immediately stood up to help the girl walk over and sit down by Ed. "Mom's a bitch. Despite knowing everything that was going on, she still decided not to be around. But you…Dad, you didn't know. And now that I've gotten to know you, I really believe that you would've been down there in a heartbeat had you been told what happened."

Ed reached over to grip Charlie's hand while Olivia knelt down in front of her.

"Charlie…" he started, not ready to give himself that relief. But she had other ideas.

"No, Dad. Just stop. You're here now. You made sure that Josh would never hurt me again. You quite literally took a bullet for me. You've given me a place where I was safe and loved. You've given me…well, more than I ever thought I'd have." She paused and smiled a bit at Ed and Olivia. "Look, we still have a ways to go. And yeah, it sucks that Mom isn't around. But you know…I have everything I need right here. You gave me that."

"Charlie, we will always be here for you." Ed spoke for both himself and Olivia. Because he knew that she was committed to the family they were building.

"I know you will." Then she turned to Olivia and smirked. "Noah won't allow otherwise."

* * *

After dinner, Ed was feeling restless so he took Noah for a walk around the lake while the sun was setting. The little boy was beside himself, having been asking all day to go to the lake, and he told the girls he would try to find some treasures for them. Charlie just ate it up, telling him she couldn't wait. Now the cabin porch was calm while Olivia and Charlie sat with their feet propped up on an ottoman and sipping on white wine and sprite, respectively.

"I really love it here, Olivia. Thanks for making this happen."

"Oh, you're welcome," she said, trying to brush it off and smiled. "I've always wanted to come up here. This was just a really good reason."

The sat in comfortable silence for a while, watching a few families grill down on the shore. Olivia would look over at Charlie every now and then, noticing she seemed lost in thought.

"What's on your mind, sweetie?" Olivia asked gently as she finished off her wine.

"Just thinking about earlier, and what Dad said about my mom," she mused but didn't take her eyes off the lake. Olivia eyed her a bit.

"How much did you overhear?"

"Enough to confirm what I already knew. She doesn't care," Charlie's tone held some contempt, but was still quiet.

"Charlie…"

"It's okay, Olivia. It isn't a surprise. That's why I didn't want to talk to her, or be around when Dad called. I knew he would get upset at her lack of concern. But I'm used to it."

"You shouldn't have to be used to that," Olivia said both from professional and personal experience. "Mommas are supposed to be there, unconditionally, for their babies.

Charlie noticed that she seemed a little lost in her own thoughts, but decided to let it go and try to lighten their conversation up a bit.

"Well, Noah has nothing to worry about in that field. He won the Momma lottery," Charlie said with a little smile at Olivia. And Olivia's face just lit up at the compliment.

"Remind him of that when he's a teenager, will ya?" Olivia winked and Charlie let out a little laugh.

"Anything you want, Olivia."

"You know, Charlie, your dad has really stepped up with Noah. He's been a father figure for him in a way I never would have dreamed he would have when I adopted him."

"He really loves Noah. It's cute to watch them together," Charlie said and smiled. "I also think it's adorable that Noah calls him 'Captain'."

"Yeah, he did that one all on his own," Olivia allowed before continuing with her original thought. "Does it bother you? Their relationship? Our relationship?"

Olivia looked at Charlie as she asked those questions, and tried to gauge how the girl was processing the conversation. After a few minutes, she started to talk.

"You know, when I was growing up my dad was really gruff. And hard. He didn't show much emotion. I knew he cared, but he never knew how to show it. Then when we moved, he would call sometimes. Send money. But that was it," the girl took a deep breath and looked out at the lake as she continued. "Ever since he reached back out, though, it's been so different. He's affectionate, I can see the emotion in his eyes, and he's constantly texting me during any given day. I have my dad back, Olivia. And I have him back, loving me, because of you."

"Oh, sweetheart," Olivia began with an emotional catch in her voice. But Charlie cut her off.

"You are the best thing that's ever happened to my relationship with my dad. And to top it all off, you come with Noah. He's just amazing," Charlie smiled. "So no. None of this bothers me. I mean, sometimes it's hard because I'm not sure how I fit in the picture. But then something happens, like Noah bringing me a stuffed dog or you bringing me home a sundress you found on sale. And it just…it feels like I have a family for the first time in a long time."

Olivia had a few tears running down her cheeks as she moved to sit on the ottoman in front of Charlie, and take her hands.

"You do have a family, Charlie. You, your dad, Noah, me…we are a family." Olivia, seeing that Charlie was okay with what she was saying so far, decided to keep going. "Noah, he sees Ed as his daddy. Even tho he hasn't thrown the title at him yet. And…I want to be that for you, too, if you'd like."

Charlie just looked at Olivia for a while with watery eyes, but the tears never quite made it down her face. She just squeezed her hands as she tried to pull herself together for a response.

"I'd like that," Charlie whispered. "I'd like that a lot."

Olivia leaned forward and gave Charlie a hug, mindful of the girl's still healing injuries. She kissed her temple as she pulled back and went to play with her hair. Charlie laughed a little.

"You like playing with my hair?"

"Yeah, Noah won't let me play with his." Olivia laughed as she responded then sat back up. "I love you, Charlie."

"Love you too."

* * *

 ** _Up Next: Ed and Charlie have a talk about Olivia, and the DA calls with an update on Josh._**

 ** _Don't forget to leave a review!_**


	28. Chapter 28

_**Lake George, Part II**_

* * *

"Ow!"

"Would you hold still?" Olivia was trying to change the dressing on Ed's bandage, but he was not cooperating.

"What is that stuff? It stings!"

"Oh for goodness sakes, you are worse than Noah. Now HOLD STILL." She scolded him as she finished applying the medicine to his wound and put on a fresh bandage. "There, all done. Geez."

Ed just grunted and sat back on the bed. He was frustrated with the fact that his injury had him even remotely incapacitated. And that frustration had grown into grumpiness. They'd been at the lake three days now, and so far all he had been able to do was take walks around with Noah and man the grill with one hand. Well, he attempted to man the grill that evening with his one hand and that was why Olivia was now having to tend to his shoulder.

"At least the steaks were good," he said, still pouting a bit. Olivia just rolled her eyes at him.

"You are impossible, Ed Tucker." But then she smiled at him and leaned down to kiss him. He very happily accepted the kiss, pulling her to stand in between his legs as he deepened it. Kissing Olivia would never get old in his book. And he would take every opportunity he could, in private, to explore her mouth. Eventually he had to pull back to get some air, but he kept his hands on her behind and continued to look up at her. Olivia's eyes were still closed and she tried to slow her breathing down after their mini make-out session. Ed loved that he had that effect on her.

"Still annoyed with me?" He asked and she opened her eyes to look at him and chuckled.

"Very…I think you need to keep kissing me," she said. Ed grabbed her hips and propelled them backwards onto the bed, Olivia letting out a shriek and landing on his chest as he devoured her mouth again.

* * *

It was pushing 9pm and Olivia was running around the yard with Noah trying to catch fireflies. Ed and Charlie just sat on the porch and laughed at their sad attempts at trapping the bugs in a mason jar. Noah was a city kid, so when he saw bugs that lit up his eyes went wide and he endlessly requested to go catch some. Finally, Olivia relented. She covered them both in bug spray and off they went. As the two Tuckers sat on the porch, one would occasionally shout out advice to the two Bensons.

"Yeah, well, you come out here and try to catch these things," Olivia would yell back to them with an eye roll, then she would continue to follow after Noah. Ed just looked over at Charlie and smiled.

"I don't think she appreciates my commentary," he said.

"Gee, wonder why dad," Charlie said with a characteristic Ed Tucker eye roll.

"Hey, Charlie?" Ed started, quite obviously leading up to some kind of important conversation. He took a deep breath and when he saw that his daughter was paying attention, he continued. "I want to talk to you about Olivia…."

"What about her?" Charlie asked, as she shot him a look of concern. "Is something wrong?"

"No," Ed quickly reassured her. "No, nothing like that. I just…well, we have been talking about getting a bigger place. Ya know, together."

Charlie just smiled at her dad's attempt at having this conversation with her. Clearly Olivia hadn't filled him in on their heart to heart several nights ago.

"I think that's great, dad. You basically live with her now anyways, and Noah could use a bigger room for all the toys I keep buying him." Ed just let out a hearty laugh at that statement.

"Yeah, you could stand to lay off the spoiling a bit."

"Never."

"Actually…" Ed began again, all of a sudden getting nervous and wiping his sweaty hands on his shorts. But he never finished his thought.

"Just spit it out, dad. Whatever it is, I guarantee you have nothing to worry about." Charlie said, trying to prod him along a bit.

"I'd like to ask Olivia to marry me…"

"Wow…" Charlie breathed the response out. She wasn't quite expecting that, but maybe she was in a way. They were perfect together. She just didn't see her dad as a proposing type.

"I don't want to do it if you aren't ready, though. I want you and Noah to be 100% okay with whatever steps Olivia and I take together," Ed was speaking fast now, and Charlie just laughed a bit and put him out of his self-created misery.

"Dad, stop. I love Olivia. I think it would be awesome if you married her." She just smiled over at him and watched the relief take over his face.

"Really?" He asked, as if he were totally shocked that she felt that way.

"Really," she said. "Dad, Olivia is amazing. She's been…well, she's been a rock for all of us. Did she tell you about our conversation the first night we were here?"

"No," he responded slowly. "She mentioned that you two had talked, but didn't go into details."

"We talked about you. And how different you were than the dad I remember growing up. She asked me if I was okay with your relationship, which of course I am. She's perfect for you. For us," Charlie said as she looked at her dad, then gave him another smirk. "And personally, I believe that if you like it you should put a ring on it."

"Who is that, Janet Jackson?" Tucker asked and she just rolled her eyes.

"Ohmigosh, dad!"

* * *

The shrill ringing of a cell phone startled Ed and Olivia out of their deep slumber. Ed fumbled around, trying to silence the thing while Olivia worked to slow her breathing. Finally, the phone stopped ringing and Olivia was able to formulate a sentence.

"What time is it?"

"I'd know if I could find my damn phone," Ed grumbled as he searched around in the dark. Olivia reached over to turn on the lamp to try and assist. The two had fallen asleep without their normal bedtime routine of setting an alarm and plugging in their phones. After such a nice evening of fireflies and family time, Olivia was feeling beyond connected to Ed and decided it was her turn to totally relax him. Apparently, it worked too well considering they had been sleeping so soundly that five minutes after being woken up, they were still not quite with it. Very unlike the two cops. Then the phone started ringing again.

"Why is someone calling at whatever the hell this hour is," Ed asked as he finally located his cell phone up under the bed and barked his answer into the speaker. "What?"

Olivia just eyed him, remaining relatively calm. Considering their family was all tucked in and sleeping in the same cabin, she wasn't all that concerned that the phone call would really rock her emotions. But she watched Ed's eyes as they went through several shades of blue in response to the person on the other line.

"What are you going to offer?" he asked, and then stood up and headed to the kitchen. Olivia quickly pulled on her robe and followed him, watching him turn on the coffee machine and realizing that whatever was happening would require some brain power.

"You know I'd prefer to save her the horror of a trial, but I just can't shake the feeling that allowing him to plea out will somehow backfire."

Aha, Olivia thought. It's the DA on Charlie's case. She wasn't too surprised that a deal was being put on the table. Josh was a smart man with a lot of connections, and likely knew going to trial at this point was a suicide mission. She moved to hit the start button on the coffee maker. When they first arrived at the cabin, she marveled at the fact that it would make two cups at the same time, as opposed to one. Ed just scoffed, still a fan of the old fashioned coffee pot life. But he was slowly coming around to the fancier machine.

"Wait, what? How the hell do you get off with that idea?" Olivia immediately left the coffee brewing and went to grab his hand to try to calm him down as he listened to whatever explanation the DA was offering. But it didn't work. "I…I need to talk to Charlie. Don't do anything else until I call you back…..yeah, sometime tomorrow. Well, later today technically. Okay."

Ed ended the call and dropped the phone onto the counter. Olivia immediately moved closer to him, running her hand up and down his back as she waited for him to explain what got him so upset with the DA. He was gripping the counter trying to get his anger in check before speaking.

"Well?" Olivia tried to prod him along, not feeling like she could handle the suspense much longer.

"Josh will plead guilty to the charges against me, breaking and entering, and also that last assault on Charlie in my apartment. But in return the DA will drop the rape charges." as Tucker spoke to Olivia, his head was still down and his eyes closed. He had also yet to release the grip on the counter. But Olivia was confused.

"Wait, what? That doesn't even make sense," she said and she shook her head a little while she was trying to absorb the information. "Does it?"

"I mean, I guess if you do the math, it isn't going to knock any time off of a sentence. He still won't get parole for 15-20 years. But he won't have a sex offender label or have to come clean about any of the sexual assaults…." Tucker finally looked over at Olivia and she could see the anger on his face.

"It's a power play…" Olivia said, finally realizing the extent of the mind games Josh Miller had been playing with Charlie. "He knows he is going down. He will go to prison. And the only way he can eternally mess with that girl is to refuse to own up to what hurt her the most…"

Tucker just kept looking at Olivia, and he could see the mirrored anger on her face.

"But, Liv…putting her through a trial? Putting our trust into a jury of twelve human beings? We've both seen how badly that can end…." Ed's voice was raspy, but passionate as he tried to wrap his head around what the prosecutors were planning.

"Are they giving us a choice here? Or was the DA just making a courtesy call?" Olivia asked, trying to decide how much brain power she should devote to deciding the lesser of two evils.

"The offer is already on the table, and they are likely to accept," he said as his head once again fell and he looked at the counter.

"And Charlie doesn't get justice for that bastard raping her over and over again," Olivia said with a bite to her voice. The thought of what this man was going to do to that girl, even being behind bars, was making her sick. She looked over Ed's shoulder and out of the large window overlooking the lake and took a deep breath. "The sun is beginning to come up, let's fix up our coffee and make a plan on how to tell her about this together."

"Or you can make all three of us a coffee and let me save you the trouble of that conversation," came a voice from across the living room. It was Charlie, standing against the doorway to her bedroom. Olivia made a beeline for the girl, while Ed stayed frozen to his spot in anger.

"Charlie…." Olivia gushed as she got to the girl and tried to help her over to the kitchen bar where Ed was standing. She got her situated on one of the stools and handed her the hot mug of coffee she had made herself. "Here, you take this one. I'll make another cup."

While Olivia busied herself making another coffee, Ed leaned over the counter and took Charlie's hand.

"Did you hear all of that?"

"Yeah. I woke up hurting about 2 hours ago, took some more pills, but still couldn't sleep." Charlie responded, not quite ready to venture into the other conversation yet.

"You should really stop eaves dropping," Ed muttered but with a half smile. Charlie just looked at him with a smirk.

"Oh please, I've saved you from an awkward conversation twice now. You should be thanking me." Ed let out an actual laugh at that point. She was definitely his kid, avoiding serious topics and discussions like a pro. But then he saw her look down and knew that she was upset at the latest information. So he squeezed her hand in silent support until she was ready to talk again.

"So this deal…" she began, slowly, and Olivia came back over to sit next to her. "He will still go to jail. For a long time. Just not for…you know."

"Right," Ed confirmed. "He will plead guilty to two counts of physical assault, one count of an illegal weapon possession, one count breaking and entering, and one count of attempted murder of a police officer."

Charlie took a gasping breath at the last charge, but didn't show any other reaction. Olivia looked to Ed, concerned at the girl's silence, so he squeezed her hand again.

"Are you okay?" He asked, then mentally scolded himself for such a dumb question.

"I…I don't know," Charlie responded. "I mean, I'm glad he will be in jail. It's just…I can't explain what I'm feeling."

"It's okay, sweetie. I understand. I really, really do," Olivia finally found her voice and turned her stool so she was totally facing Charlie. "You may never be able to explain how you feel about any of this. But, he will still be in jail. He will never be able to hurt you again…"

"Physically hurt me…" Charlie muttered softly, but both Ed and Olivia heard it. They watched as she straightened up as much as she could with her sore body, and put on a brave face. "But, I guess I'll take what I can get. And the rest…well…I'll just have to figure out how to deal with it."

"We." Olivia said firmly. "We will figure out how to deal with it. Together. You aren't on your own here. We'll navigate this, and everything else, as a family."

* * *

 ** _Thoughts? Leave a review!_**

 ** _I apologize for the lack of Noah cuteness in this chapter. I'll try to make it up to you in the next one..._**


	29. Chapter 29

**_The last half of this chapter got a little more M than I planned, so consider this a warning in case that isn't your thing._**

 ** _Lake George, Part III_**

* * *

"Are you okay?"

It had been a couple of hours since Ed had gotten the phone call about the plea deal being offered to Josh Miller. After Charlie overhead the conversation, the three of them took their morning coffee to the cabin porch to watch the sunrise together. The girl had been incredibly quiet, though, since their initial conversation and it was concerning Ed.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Charlie responded, but her voice lacked any emotion.

"You know, Charlie, it is okay to not be okay…" Ed spoke cautiously, not wanting to be overbearing, but knowing deep down she was upset. But Charlie just turned her head towards him, not making eye contact and giving a tight smile.

"I'm fine. He's going to jail. I don't have to deal with a trial. What is there to be upset about?" Her response was muted and it caused Olivia to flash Ed a look of concern. "I actually think I need to take another pain pill - everything is hurting right now."

Ed stood up, halting Charlie's attempt to move and walked towards the door.

"I'll get them. You stay put."

"Yeah, thanks dad." Charlie looked at him appreciatively, then turned back and closed her eyes. Olivia just kept eyeing the girl. "I can feel you looking at me, Olivia. I'm fine."

"Charlie, I invented that line. It's not going to work on me," Olivia responded with a little humor in her voice, but it was all truth. She spent years telling people she was fine and not once did it pan out well for her. "You don't have to talk to us about how you are feeling, but admitting that it bothers you will free up a little of your energy. You won't have to work so hard to pretend."

Charlie just let out a sigh but didn't move her head or open her eyes back up. It was clear the girl was in some physical pain, but Olivia wasn't sure that was all. She kept looking at Charlie as she thought back to when the verdict was read on William Lewis; how it felt to hear that they didn't believe her on the sexual assault and attempted rape charge. What that lack of acknowledgement did to her psyche, despite the fact that Lewis was still going to prison. They had a long road ahead of them, with or without a trial for Josh.

"I really appreciate you, Olivia. Honestly. You've kept me together this entire time. But I just don't want to talk about it right now. I can't. My whole body hurts and I can't focus on anything else," Charlie finally made eye contact with Olivia and her voice was sincere. So she let it go. At least she finally got some honesty and emotion out of the girl.

"That's fine, sweetie. I'll drop it. But whenever you need to talk, I'm here to listen." Olivia spoke and saw the tears bubble up in Charlie's eyes, but she quickly swallowed them down and just nodded her thanks. At that moment, Ed came back out with Charlie's prescription bottle and a can of Sprite.

"Here, kiddo." He handed her the bottle and watched her quickly pop two large white pills into her mouth and gulp them down. Instead of immediately turning to go back inside to store them away, he sat for a bit on the edge of her lounge and put his hand on her calf. "What else can we do for the pain?"

"I don't know," Charlie said as she winced. "I'm just going to stay still and hope this stuff will knock me out. Maybe sleeping in all the nice scenery will do the trick."

Ed sat there a little while longer, and watched her face as she tried to relax and drift off. After a couple of minutes, he stood up and went to grab Olivia's coffee cup.

"I'll refill us," he said and headed inside. As he reached the door, Noah was toddling towards them, dragging his blanket and rubbing his eyes. "Good morning buddy!"

Ed scooped him up and helped him get out onto the porch, but the boy was soon squirming for his mom. Olivia reached out as Ed plopped him into her lap.

"I'll get him some milk while I'm inside," he said as he kissed Liv's head and headed off again. She waited until the door had closed and then nuzzled her face into Noah's cheek.

"Good morning sweet boy, did you sleep okay?"

"Yeah," Noah responded softly, as he tried to awaken from the slumber. That's when he noticed Charlie asleep on the lounge chair and he pointed towards her. "Tar-lie still sleepin'?"

"Charlie is sleeping. She had a lot of ouchies this morning." Olivia spoke to her son, hoping that he wouldn't go bombard the girl just yet. Once he heard that his friend was in pain, he looked up with big, concerned eyes.

"Tar-lie still have boo-boos, momma?" He asked and Olivia's heart just melted at his innocence and caring spirit.

"She will have boo-boos for a little while, Noah. We have to keep being very gentle, okay?"

"I know, momma. I be gentle. Tar-lie says I always make her better."

"I'm sure you do, baby boy. Mommy loves you so much." Olivia said as she hugged her little boy closer.

"Lub you too, Momma," he said softly before sticking his thumb back in his mouth and cuddling into Olivia's chest.

* * *

"Tar-lie! Tar-lie! I caught a fishie! Look it!" Little Noah came running towards the girl, who was lying in a free standing hammock on the shore of the lake. She tipped her sunglasses up and offered him a giant smile as he neared her holding a tiny, slimy fish squirming around.

"Good job, pal!" Noah just beamed at her in pride as she examined the little fish.

"We name him, Tar-lie! Dis is Fred." Noah said excitedly and Charlie just laughed as she held her aching ribs in place.

"Fred the Fish? I like it," she said to the little boy. He promptly turned around and ran back towards Ed, who was still standing about knee deep in the lake holding a bright orange bucket, yelling that Charlie ok'd the name for his new fish. Charlie just kept chuckling as she placed her glasses back over her eyes. She had slept several hours that morning on the porch and was now feeling a little bit better. So that evening, before dinner, they made their way down to the lake shore as Noah had been begging to try and catch some of the minnows that were swimming in the shallow area. Ed mentioned it might be fun to cook hotdogs and marshmallows over a campfire down by the water, and the rest of the little family quickly agreed. So they packed up and made the quick walk down to the sandy shore. Charlie still wasn't up to much activity, so she planted herself in the hammock while Ed took Noah into the water. Olivia had been standing on the shore taking about a thousand pictures of an overly enthusiastic Noah. Charlie was so engrossed in watching the little boy, that she didn't notice Olivia was walked back up to stand next to her hammock.

"I hope he knows he can't keep that thing…" Olivia muttered, causing Charlie to startle a bit before realizing who was talking to her. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"Oh, it's okay. Just jumpy. Codeine can do that to you…" she trailed off towards the end there, and Olivia decided to just nod in agreement.

"Do you think you will be up for staying out here to make dinner and dessert? We could always eat in the cabin tonight, and then do the campfire tomorrow."

"Dad was going to look into the boat for tomorrow, wasn't he?" Charlie asked, remembering that Ed had talked about going for a boat ride.

"Oh, that's right. Well, we still don't have to stay down here all evening if you don't want to," she just wanted the girl not to push herself.

"I slept most of the morning, it will be nice to just be out for the evening." Charlie responded, and Liv was confident that she was being truthful, so she let it go.

"Now we just have to hope that Noah likes the smoky taste of a hotdog."

"Ha, if not I'm sure he will let us know," Charlie said teasingly and Olivia just laughed. You never had to guess when Noah didn't like a food. He had a terrible poker face, even when he tried.

* * *

Later that night, Ed and Olivia were both laying in bed and reading on their iPads. Ed finally took his glasses off and put the tablet down, sighing. Olivia, sensing that he was about to say something, followed his lead and turned on to her side to face him.

"What is it?" She asked as she rubbed her hand over his bare chest.

"That feels nice…" he mumbled, not wanting to talk but wanting the closeness. He pulled her closer to him, wrapping her leg over his body and kissed her. There was no slow lead in to this kiss, he just devoured her aggressively. Olivia didn't protest, so Ed just continued to take what he needed from her. His hand was kneading her behind as his tongue explored every crevice it could find in her mouth. She finally needed to pull back for some air, but he only let her get two breaths in before shoving his tongue back in her mouth. Olivia let out a little whimper, but it was a good whimper so Ed didn't back off. He needed her, in a way he hadn't in quite some time. Olivia could sense that, so she was just surrendering. Ever since all of this had started with Charlie, Ed had been almost too sensitive when they were in bed together. While she appreciated that, she kept telling him she wasn't going to break. She liked when he was a little more aggressive. She trusted him, so she wasn't about to stop where this was headed.

Ed, while still kissing her, got a good grip and rolled her onto her back and he pressed down on top of her. Once he got himself settled between her legs, he slowly began to work his way from her mouth, across her jaw, and down her neck. As her breathing got heavier, he starting grinding his hips into hers creating a delicious friction. She let out a louder whimper and he looked up, momentarily, to check in.

"Is this okay?" He asked breathlessly, never wanting her to be uncomfortable. She just nodded quickly and pulled his mouth back down to her neck. He sucked and nipped behind her ear, knowing he would leave a mark, but not caring in that moment. He kept working her over as she used her feet to slide his boxers down and off. Ed quickly grabbed her nightshirt and lifted it over her head, throwing it onto the floor and mentally thanking her for not wearing underwear. Ignoring the pain in his shoulder, he grabbed Olivia's hands and pinned them above her head while looking deep into her eyes.

"I need you…" He said, as he searched her eyes for any sign she wasn't okay with a rougher night of lovemaking. All he saw was love and lust on her face.

"So take me…" She breathed the words as she felt his hips pressing into hers, clearly trying hard not to enter her.

"Are you ready, though?" He asked, not wanting to let go of her hands to check himself, trusting her to let him know if she needed more foreplay. She nodded quickly, moving her hips and indicating she was more the ready. As he lined himself up with her entrance, he pressed his forehead to hers and looked deep into her eyes.

"I love you Olivia. I love you so much." Before he gave her a chance to respond, he thrust himself hard into her, filling her completely up.

"Ugh!" Olivia let out a restrained grunt, knowing the kids were just across the cabin. Her head turned to the side as Ed thrust hard and fast into her, and bit her lip to stop from crying out. He immediately took that opportunity to suck on her neck some more as he kept slamming into her.

"Oh, god. Ed." Her voice was a soft whimper, and it was that voice that turned Ed Tucker on more than he would ever explain. The pain was radiating through his shoulder, but he didn't care. He just needed Olivia. Ed tore his lips away from her neck and used his nose to force her to look at him. He watched her face react to each thrust he gave her, and he knew right then that he could never be without her.

"Harder. Please don't stop," she managed to get the words out in between grunts.

"Never. I will never stop loving you, baby."

* * *

They were both laying on their backs, completely limp, holding hands and breathing hard. It had been a while since they had a night like that, so it was taking them both a little while to recover.

"That was…amazing," Olivia said, as she finally got her breathing under control. Ed just squeezed her hand and grunted in agreement. She felt him turn over onto his side, so she did the same, and he reached out to stroke her cheek as his eyes combed over her face.

"Liv?"

"Yeah?"

"I never want to be without you," he said, in a whisper. Olivia reached up to clasp his hand, holding it to her cheek as she gazed at him.

"I never want to be without you either. I couldn't bare it," she returned, mirroring his whisper. They continued to lay just like that, breathing together, until Ed finally took a deep breath and spoke.

"Marry me…"

* * *

 ** _Thoughts?_**

 ** _The next chapter is intended to be the last of this story. Many of you have expressed a desire to read more about the recovery and the melding of the Tucker/Benson family. Let me know in your review if you want a sequel, or for the story to continue, and I'll see what I can do. Your interest is my motivation!_**


	30. Chapter 30

_**Ok lovelies you get your wish. I have redone my story map, and you will now have several more chapters of Come Together before it ends. Hopefully it won't disappoint!**_

* * *

 **Previously**

 _They were both laying on their backs, completely limp, holding hands and breathing hard. It had been a while since they had a night like that, so it was taking them both a little while to recover._

 _"That was…amazing," Olivia said, as she finally got her breathing under control. Ed just squeezed her hand and grunted in agreement. She felt him turn over onto his side, so she did the same, and he reached out to stroke her cheek as his eyes combed over her face._

 _"_ _Liv?"_

 _"_ _Yeah?"_

 _"I never want to be without you," he said, in a whisper. Olivia reached up to clasp his hand, holding it to her cheek as she gazed at him._

 _"I never want to be without you either. I couldn't bare it," she returned, mirroring his whisper. They continued to lay just like that, breathing together, until Ed finally took a deep breath and spoke._

 _"Marry me…"_

* * *

 **Lake George, Part IV**

Olivia's heart stopped beating as soon as she heard those two words.

"What?" She asked, just making sure she wasn't hallucinating.

"Marry me," Ed whispered to her again, searching deep into her eyes. They stayed like that, silent, for several minutes before she could sense his anxiety begin to go up. "I'm not trying to scare you. I hadn't planned on just springing it on you like that. I mean, I don't even have a ring. But…I've never felt so sure about anything in my entire life, Olivia."

"Ed…" As soon as Olivia said his name, tears started falling from her eyes. "I don't know what to say."

He went to take both of her hands in his and rested them in between their bodies, while still facing each other on the bed and covered in a thin sheet. Tucker squeezed her hands, reassuringly, before going to speak again.

"I love you, and our family, more than anything in this world. We have a good thing going here, the four of us. Let's make it official." Ed continued to search her eyes, looking for any reason that she might bolt from him. But all he saw was pure shock and unconditional love, so he took another deep breath. "Olivia Margaret Benson, will you marry me?"

"Yes…" she breathed out her answer softly, but he still heard it. "Yes, I will marry you."

* * *

"Tar-lie?" A little whisper made it's way through the darkness surrounding Charlie as she attempted to sleep. "Tar-lie…"

She opened her eyes and came face to face with Noah, who was standing patiently next to her bed, holding his blanket.

"Tar-lie, I can't sleep. I stay wiff you?" Noah asked with a sleep filled whisper.

"Sure thing, pal," Charlie said as she slowly moved over, trying not to jar her body, and made room for the little tyke. He climbed up beside her and snuggled in, rubbing the blanket over his face for comfort. "You okay, Noah? What's wrong?"

"It dark and I alone. Scary." Charlie could barely make out what the boy was saying, because if blanket was still over his face. But she got the picture and hugged him tightly to her, ignoring the pain.

"Well, you don't have to be scared anymore because I'm right here," as she spoke, Noah looked up at her with his wide eyes. "And I'll be right beside you all night, okay?"

Noah nodded at her, but continued to rub his face with the blanket.

"Did you have a bad dream? Is that why you woke up?"

"Yes." He spoke so softly, but he was cuddled in so close that Charlie could still hear him.

"What happened? Do you want to tell me about it?" Noah just looked up at her again with those eyes that melt her heart on a daily basis. There was little doubt in anyone's mind that she was putty in his hands.

"I lost in woods. It dark. No blankie or Cap'n or Momma or Tar-lie. It scary. I woked up and heard noise. So I come here."

"What kind of noise, pal?" Charlie asked, trying to gauge whether an animal might be outside.

"Dunno," Noah said. "Sound like a person. And squeaks."

Charlie thought for a little bit, wondering if maybe an animal was crawling in the ceiling. Then it clicked: Ed and Olivia. Noah probably overheard some kind of adult activity once he woke up from his nightmare. Gross, she thought and shook her head to try and get that mental image out before trying to decide how to calm the little boy down.

"The noise was probably just the wind. But your nightmare sounds scary, pal. The good news is that it wasn't real and you are not alone. Captain and Momma are in their room. And you can stay in here with me as long as you want, okay?" The little boy seemed to relax after that statement, and he tried to wrap his little arm around Charlie as he snuggled in further. His hand lightly patted her on the stomach.

"Tanks, Tar-lie. I lub you." He said right before his thumb went back in his mouth and his eyes closed. Charlie just watched him sleep for a while before responding in a whisper.

"I love you too, pal."

* * *

It was pushing 2am and Ed had just finished making love, again, to his now fiance. Olivia was laying limp across his chest looking thoroughly fucked and sated. Ed was just gazing down at her, loving her post-orgasm flushed skin and messy hair. He kissed her forehead and pulled her tighter to him.

"You're really going to marry me?" He asked in his husky bedroom voice.

"I'm really going to marry you," she muttered without moving her head. "I'd seal it with a kiss, but you've turned my body into jelly."

"That was the goal, baby." Tucker said to her as he ran his fingers through her messy tangles. "I'm sorry I proposed without a ring or some fancy set up."

"It was perfect. I don't want anything fancy. I just want you," Olivia finally lifted her head so her chin was resting on his chest and she could look into his eyes. "Forever."

"Well, you have me." Tucker let them settle into a comfortable silence and pulled the comforter back over their bodies. He knew he still needed to talk to her about a few things, but wanted to relish in their recent engagement before diving into reality. Unfortunately for him, Olivia was an expert at reading his body language.

"What aren't you tell me?" She asked, while moving her hands under her chin and continuing to look up at him. He just smirked and shook his head.

"Can't hide anything from you, can I?" He asked lovingly and she shook her head back at him. So Ed took a deep breath and decided to just dive head first. "I'm going to put my papers in when we get back..."

Olivia's eyes got wide and she sat up, pulling the sheet around her body as she just stared at him for a while.

"Ed..."

"I think it is time. This whole thing with Charlie has me realizing how tired I am. I've missed so much of her life, or life in general, all because of work. I think it's time to throw in the towel. I take no issue with the fact that I'll leave after putting a bullet through that bastard. And now, I can focus on being Charlie's dad. Noah's Captain. Mr. Olivia Benson."

"Wow," Olivia breathed out her response. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure," he said. "I can do private consulting on my own schedule, if I decide I'm bored with retirement."

"So this is you telling me of your decision, not us having a discussion about it?" She asked him with her eyes narrowed a bit. She wasn't upset with him, but it was unlike him to just make a decision like that without even hinting to her that he was thinking about it. Sure he had talked, in a passing, about how it would be nice to retire. But it was never a serious discussion. The timing of him proposing and then dropping this bombshell just seemed off. As she looked down at him from where she was still sitting up on the bed, she noticed he wouldn't make eye contact in that moment. "What?"

"Before I tell you this, I want you to know that I am 100% okay with it. I'm not upset. So I don't want you to get upset either, okay?"

"That's not the lead-in I want to hear right now, Ed Tucker. Spit it out."

"Handing in my papers is one of the stipulations for Josh Miller accepting the plea deal." Ed watched as Olivia's eyes got wide, and the golden brown sparkle turned dark before she narrowed them.

"What?" She hissed her question at him, but he didn't flinch. "Why are you just now telling me this? How is that even legal?"

"Liv, it's okay," Ed said calmly as he sat up and took her hand, having anticipated this piece of news would fire her up. "Miller's lawyer slid the condition in under the table, saying Josh would agree only if I did this."

"So we take him to trial, Ed. This is crazy! Charlie is already upset that he won't be admitting to the rape. She will be devastated when you tell her this." Olivia's voice was passionate, as it always was when fighting for victims, but this time - the victim she fought for was her soon to be step-daughter. "Ed, this isn't right."

"It's messed up, I'll give you that," he conceded. "But I was thinking about turning in my papers before this. And honestly, this is something I can do to help Charlie. To keep her rapist away from her for good. There isn't a question in my mind that this is what I should do."

"You don't think you should talk to her first?" Ed handed Olivia her nightshirt and pulled on his boxers, then shook his head.

"Olivia, she is in no condition to make a decision about this right now. You know that and I know that. This way, everything is done and we can focus on helping her heal." Tucker's voice cracked towards the end of his statement, and Olivia could tell that he wanted to do this. He felt so guilty about not being there for Charlie when all of this began. This was his way of trying to make up for that. To sacrifice whatever he could of himself, so his daughter could breath easy. As far as Olivia was concerned, her role was to be their rock and support them through whatever she could. "This is the right thing to do for our family, Liv."

"Okay," she said. "Then I'm behind you 110%."

"Are you really?" Ed asked, a little shocked that the conversation went as well as it did.

"Always," she said and leaned over to kiss him on the lips. "And forever."

* * *

 _ **Up Next: Charlie and Noah learn of the engagement and Ed tries to find a suitable but temporary solution for the lack of engagement ring.**_

 _ **Show some love, leave a review!**_


	31. Chapter 31

**_Lake George, Part V_**

* * *

"You like boo-berries, Tar-lie?" Noah asked as he reached his sticky hands back into the bowl of fresh blueberries on the table. The little boy's mouth and chin were purple at this point, matched only by his hands. Noah was a kid who loved his fruit. You could put any kind of berry in front of him and he'd devour the entire stash. Now Charlie just looked at him with an amused smirk.

"I love blueberries," she responded. "Obviously you do, too, because you have turned BLUE!"

Noah gave her a surprised look.

"I BOO?!" he exclaimed just before dissolving into laughter. "Momma, Tar-lie said I boo!"

Ed and Olivia were sitting across from them munching on cereal and enjoying the interaction between the two kids. Ed had disappeared for a bit that morning, which confused Olivia, but all he said was that he wanted a sunrise stroll. He was up to something, but she decided not to press any further.

"I think she's right, sweetheart," Olivia said after swallowing her bite. "You may need a bath this morning."

"No tank you," he responded and went back to eating the berries. Olivia just rolled her eyes and shook her head, then turned to look at Ed. He took a deep breath, put his spoon down, and ran his hand over his head.

"Hey you two, Liv and I want to talk to you about something," Ed said as both Charlie and Noah looked up at him with curious faces. Ed reached over and grabbed Olivia's hand before continuing. "We decided last night that we would like to get married."

"Wow! Congratulations," Charlie exclaimed with a big, genuine smile on her face. Noah just looked at Ed with some confusion.

"What that?" He asked and all three adults let out a little chuckle. Of course the three, almost four, year old didn't know what getting married was. Olivia took control of the explanation.

"It means that we will get a piece of paper saying that we are married. Then you and me and Ed and Charlie will be family forever and ever." As Olivia spoke it was clear that the little boy was trying to understand, but he was really too young to get the sentiment of the situation.

"We all get married?" Noah asked, not quite sure what his role was in all of this.

"Something like that." responded Olivia. "We will all be committing to each other. To being a family."

"So Tar-lie be my sister?" He asked.

"Yep, Charlie will be your sister."

"And Cap'n be my daddy?" Olivia just looked at Ed, signaling for him to answer that question. They hadn't really discussed this aspect of it yet.

"Noah, I can be Daddy if that's what you want. Or I can keep being 'Captain', okay?" Ed spoke directly to the little boy in a calm tone, and Noah looked at him very seriously.

"Otay," he said, but offered no real resolution. Ed just shot Olivia a glance, and she gave him a reassuring smile before turning her attention to Charlie.

"Are you okay with all of this?" she asked, wanting to make sure the girl felt included in their decision. But her question was just met with a big smile.

"I think it's great, Olivia," she said. "But there's just one thing…"

"What is that, sweetie?" She asked and Ed gripped Olivia's hand tighter, suddenly very nervous.

"We should probably tell dad that he forgot to give you a ring…"

* * *

Later that morning, the foursome was settled on the deck of a boat Ed had rented for the day. He originally wanted a sail boat, but as good as his shoulder was feeling, it wasn't feeling good enough for that. A speed boat, however, was definitely doable. He packed a cooler full of sandwiches, snacks, and drinks while Olivia packed a couple of bags with sunscreen and towels before they went off for the day. Now they were settled out in the middle of the lake where several other boats were parked to enjoy the sun.

"When do you think you'll have the wedding?" Charlie asked, as she stretched her legs in front of her. She was wearing a large, floppy straw hat and big sunglasses with her white swim cover up. Olivia convinced her to put on her bathing suit, saying that her bruises were fine and it was just the four of them, but the girl still wouldn't take the cover-up off.

"I'm not sure. We didn't really talk about that," Olivia responded as she moved her sunglasses to the top of her head and closed her eyes to soak in the rays. She was sporting a deep green one piece that hugged her curves perfectly. "I'm not sure I want an actual wedding, though. Maybe just a small ceremony."

"That makes sense," Charlie said. "Ohmigosh, Liv, look at them."

The girls focused their attention on Ed and Noah, who were floating around by the boat on a giant inflatable raft. Noah was on his knees pointing in the direction he wanted the raft to float and Ed would use his legs to try and steer them. When the raft didn't go in the exact direction, Noah would turn around and say "Cap'in DIS way". The girls just laughed at the scene.

"Someone should tell Noah that if Ed is Captain, then he doesn't actually get to give the orders," Olivia said with a grin. She loved watching Ed interact with Noah. Charlie just chuckled and they sat observing them for a little while.

"You should do one of those location wedding packages," Charlie offered. "You know, like have 10 people, plus you two, and go somewhere nice. You can have them plan the whole thing, so you don't have to worry about details. Then once it is over, you are already on your honeymoon!"

"That's a great idea," Olivia said, beginning to formulate a plan to convince Ed. "I love it. But where would we go?"

"Ooooh, let's pick some place fun and romantic," Charlie gushed and looked over at Olivia. "Where have you always wanted to go but never been able to?"

"That's hard," admitted Liv. "It's a long list. I have never traveled much unless it was for work. I barely even took vacation days until I got Noah."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I was basically married to the job. Didn't have family. But now…." Olivia trailed off in her thoughts, letting Charlie fill in the blanks.

"Now you have Noah," Charlie finished for her.

"No, now I have Noah, Ed and you," she said and looked at the young lady next to her. Charlie was a pillar of strength, as far as Olivia was concerned. The amount of trauma she had endured in her short lifetime along with the fact that she was still sitting on a boat and smiling, said everything Olivia needed to know about her. She reached over and grabbed her almost daughter's hand before speaking again.

"Charlie, I'm so proud of you, and I'm so grateful for the chance to be your mom."

* * *

"Okay little man, I'm going to show you a secret," Ed spoke to Noah as they took their evening walk around the lake. Olivia and Charlie were exhausted from a day of sun, so Ed figured he could tire the little boy out with their daily walk. He also had something else in mind.

"A see-cret?" Noah asked, looking up at Ed.

"Yep. It is a present for mommy." Noah got excited at that statement and started jumping and clapping.

"A see-cret for Momma!" He called out a few times, before Ed stopped laughing and calmed him down.

"Right," he said. "But we have to be still while I show you."

Ed stopped and sat down on a bench along the shore. He pulled Noah up to sit in his lap and then reached into the larger pocket of his cargo shorts. In his hand was a small pocket knife and the makings of a neatly carved wooden ring.

"What that, Cap'in?" Noah asked, running his finger along the smooth finishing of the ring. Ed noticed that the little boy had continued to call him Captain throughout the day. There was a part of him that wished he would say "daddy", but for now it seemed the boy was sticking with Captain, and that was okay.

"Normally, when people decide to get married, the guy gives the girl a ring. But I don't have a pretty diamond yet for your Momma. So I decided I would carve her one out of the wood from the trees here." Ed spoke in hushed tones to the boy, as if the animals that surrounded them would run back and ruin the surprise.

"Wow…." Noah whispered and continued to touch the ring.

"If you want, you can help me sand it down and finish it." Ed offered to the boy, wanting him to be a part of this whole process. He looked up at him with a big smile.

"Yes!" He exclaimed happily as Ed pulled some sand paper out and showed him out to gently rub down the ring. While the little boy concentrated hard on his task, Ed just watched him in awe. He couldn't believe that this little boy would soon be his son. Well, step-son, but at this point what was the difference? He was the father figure in his life, period. There was no "step" about it. After all these years of living with the regret of how he failed Charlie, he was getting a second chance. Really, his second chance was coming with both Charlie and Noah, and he would never stop being grateful for his late-in-life family.

"Here, try to sand a little on the inside too," Ed spoke and showed him how to rub the sand paper with his one finger, so it would reach inside the ring. Noah watched very carefully, before he slowly tried it for himself.

"Look-it, Cap'in! I helping make married ring for Momma!" Noah exclaimed as he continued with his task. Ed just kissed the top of his head.

"You sure are," he said. "She will love it."

* * *

Ed and Olivia sat curled up together in the chaise on the cabin porch, watching the moonlight bounce off the lake. Noah was fast asleep and Charlie had gone in to shower and lay down. It was clear she was in pain that evening but didn't want to talk about it, so they watched her inside and then cuddled up on the same lounge.

"She isn't okay." Ed said gruffly. He felt Olivia nod against his chest in agreement.

"No, she's not. And she still doesn't know about you putting in your papers. But she's with us. We will make sure she is okay." Olivia tried to reassure her fiancé, even though she was a bit worried herself. She just closed her eyes and snuggled in closer to him, loving the closeness of the moment. Ed tightened his protective hold on Olivia and kissed her temple.

"She's right about one thing though." Ed muttered against her hair.

"What's that?" Olivia turned her head to look up at him right as he produced the wooden circle from his pocket.

"I should give you a ring," Ed was whispering straight into Olivia's soul as he held the freshly carved wooden ring. "At least until we get back to the city and I can get you a proper diamond."

"Oh, Ed," she gushed. "Did you make that?"

"I did," he nodded and turned the ring around so she could see it. "Noah helped, too."

"I never knew you were a whittler," Olivia said, still in awe that this hard, gruff fiancé of hers just produced a hand-crafted temporary engagement ring.

"It was an old hobby," Ed admitted. "And it was either this or a plastic ring from a Cracker Jack box."

Olivia just laughed as she ran her index finger around the smooth ring.

"I know it's not ideal, but I want people to know that you are off the market." Ed said, hoping that Olivia wasn't annoyed at his feeling that way. He slowly slid the wooden ring onto her left ring finger.

"It's perfect," she said and leaned up to kiss him once the ring was in place. "You are perfect."

* * *

 ** _Up Next: More lake adventures. And how long can Ed put off telling Charlie about his end of the deal with Josh?_**

 ** _Leave a review!_**


	32. Chapter 32

_**Lake George, Part VI**_

* * *

Charlie woke up startled, in a dark room. She quickly got up to try and figure out where she was, but all she could see was darkness. All of a sudden two pairs of hands grabbed her and threw her back down on her bed.

"Noooooooo," she cried as the two sets of hands tore at her clothes and violated her body. One of the unknown attackers got right up to her ear, breathing heavily.

"You stay still. You don't want us to go next door to that sleeping little boy, do you?" The other voice chuckled at that point and decided to join the taunting.

"Or what about that hot mama sleeping across the cabin?" They both just laughed and laughed as Charlie went limp and let out an ear piercing sob.

"That's what I thought. You be a good girl now, and we will leave your family alone."

* * *

"Momma," Noah whispered and patted Olivia on the shoulder as she slumbered. "Momma, wake up."

"Hmmmm?" Olivia popped her head up, but couldn't quite get her eyes open. "Noah?"

"It me, Momma." Noah whispered, waiting for her to join the land of the living. She rubbed her eyes and sat up, finally looking at her little boy standing next to the bed holding his blanket.

"What is it, sweet boy? she cooed, but with a sleepy whisper to her voice. Ed was still lightly snoring next to her, so she wanted to keep their voices down.

"Tar-lie upset," Noah whispered loudly. "She yelling and crying in her room. So I'm comed get you."

Olivia immediately got up and threw on a sweatshirt. She picked Noah up, kissed him, and placed him on the bed next to Ed.

"You cuddle up here, ok? I'll go check on Charlie."

"Otay, momma." Noah stuck his thumb back in his mouth and snuggled into Olivia's pillow as he watched her hurry out of the room.

By the time Olivia was halfway across the cabin, she could hear Charlie's piercing cries, so she broke into a jog to get to the girl. As soon as she opened the door, her heart snapped in two. Charlie was fighting off imaginary demons, completely tangled up in the sheets, and she was soaked with tears and sweat.

"No! Leave me alone! Leave my family alone!" She yelled out and Olivia made a break for the bed to try and wake her up.

"Charlie…Charlie it's Olivia. Wake up baby," she spoke softly and tried to caress her face gently, so as to not scare her anymore But it wasn't working. She slapped her hand away.

"NOOOOOOOOOO" Charlie shrieked and Olivia could no longer stand it. She got on her knees on the bed and started to shake the girl in order to wake her up.

"Charlie!"

It finally worked as Charlie's eyes flew open and she scrambled away from Olivia and into the headboard of the bed. Her eyes were darting around the room and her breathing was intense. Olivia patiently sat on the bed while Charlie tried to orient herself.

"You're okay, baby. It was just a nightmare," Olivia spoke softly, still not allowing herself to touch the frightened girl. "A horrible nightmare, but that's all it was. You are safe. We are all safe, okay?"

"Olivia?" Charlie asked in a broken voice.

"Yeah, sweetheart, it's me. I'm right here." She was still speaking softly, but now slowly moving towards her. She reached out to take her hand, and felt Charlie squeeze tightly, so she took that as a sign it was okay to keep going. Olivia finally settled her back against the headboard so she was right next to Charlie. "You're okay."

"I…." was all she could get out before completely breaking down into body wrenching sobs. Olivia just pulled her tightly into her side, holding her head to her chest and rocking her back and forth. "I'm sorry, Olivia. I'm so sorry."

"Shhhhh, it's okay." Olivia would just whisper to her as she continued to hold her as tight as she could without aggravating the girl's broken ribs. "You have nothing to be sorry for. Just calm down, okay? Everything is okay."

They stayed just like that for about an hour, before Charlie finally took a deep, shuddering breath and sat up a bit. She wiped at her face, but kept her head down. Olivia just rubbed her back and handed her a box of kleenex from the nightstand.

"Thanks," she responded meekly as she took the tissues and tried to pull herself together.

"You want some water?" Olivia asked, hesitant to leave her side but wanting to make sure she was comfortable.

"Yeah, there should be some on the dresser," Charlie responded, her voice already sounding clearer. "Can you hand me the pain pills too? I definitely jarred myself."

As Olivia made her way over the the dresser, she stopped to check the time on the alarm clock.

"Did you take some before bed? It may not have been 8 hours yet…" Olivia chose her words carefully, but she had noticed that the girl was rarely without the drugs in her system. She knew her body was in pain, but she was also worried that she was avoiding the emotional pain with narcotics.

"Oh, maybe you're right." Charlie said, clearly still not oriented after her hellish nightmare. "Maybe if I just stay still, the pain will die down."

Olivia smiled and came back over with the water, leaving the pills on her dresser. She watched as the girl gulped down the liquid, then lean back against the pillows and close her eyes. Olivia snuggled down into the bed and turned onto her side so she could keep an eye on Charlie. They both stayed like that for a little while, before Charlie opened her eyes and looked over at Olivia.

"Was I that loud?" She asked, now worried that she woke up the entire cabin.

"It's an open cabin, so sound travels," Olivia offered.

"God…did I wake up Noah? He must have been scared…"

"He's fine. He came to get me and is now happily snuggled in and asleep with your dad."

"Still…" Charlie was feeling pretty terrible and embarrassed about waking everyone up. Olivia immediately put the worries at ease.

"Charlie, it's fine. This is what families do. Nothing to be ashamed about. Plus, it gets me away from your dad's snoring." She joked with her, and finally got a small smile from the girl. "Now, Noah stole my spot in the bed, so do you mind if I just stay with you?"

"Yeah, I'd like that." Charlie allowed herself to need someone for the time being, and they both got comfortable under the covers. "Thanks, Olivia…"

"You're welcome, sweet girl."

* * *

Ed groggily reached over for Olivia about 6am the next morning, but was met with a much smaller target than he was used to. He popped his eyes opened and was greeted by an awake, but sleepy eyed Noah looking back at him.

"Morning, buddy," Ed spoke, still feeling confused as to where Olivia was. "Did you kick mom out of the bed?"

Noah just rubbed his blanket against his face and shook his head.

"No. She go help Tar-lie. So I sleep here wiff you." Noah said and moved to cuddle into Ed's side. Ed welcomed the connection and held him close. "Tar-lie have bad dream. So I waked up momma to make it better."

"Noah, Charlie is so lucky to have you looking after her. Love you, buddy."

"Lub you too," he said, though his words were slurred around the thumb in his mouth.

"What do you say we get dressed and go get pancakes in town, so Momma and Charlie can sleep in?" Noah's eyes lit up immediately at the idea and started to climb out of the bed.

"I want pancakes! Let's go, Daddy!"

Ed froze, but Noah didn't seem to take notice to the fact that he just called Ed "daddy". He quickly recovered and went to throw on some shorts and a t-shirt. He would have to let that digest later when Olivia was around.

"Ok, bud, let's go." They began to depart, with Ed secretly hoping that Noah would continue with the "daddy" thing.

* * *

It was pushing 9am before Olivia stirred awake and rolled over to see how Charlie was doing. The girl was sleeping peacefully on her back, much to her relief. So she slowly sat up and made her way to the bathroom to pee and freshen up. As she wandered back into the living room, Charlie was already up and brewing their coffee.

"Looks like dad took Noah to get pancakes, so we are left to fend for ourselves." Charlie spoke with her usual smirk which immediately relaxed Olivia. The horrors of the night were in the past.

"Oh, if they know what's good for them they will return with our breakfast in hand." Olivia winked at Charlie before fixing up her coffee and joining the girl at the breakfast bar. "How are you feeling?"

Charlie took a long, slow sip of her coffee before attempting her answer.

"I'm okay," she said softly. "I still feel a little rattled, but not as much as I usually do."

"Good," Olivia said and patted the girl's hand. "Small steps in the right direction."

"Thanks for staying with me, though," Charlie admitted, without making eye contact. "It really helped."

"You are more than welcome." Olivia said, then took a deep breath before delivering her next line. "Charlie, I'd like to talk to you about a few things if you are feeling up to it?"

"Sure, Liv," she responded nervously, but willing to listen to anything the woman had to say.

"I've been going to the same therapist for years, and there is a new lady in his office that I think would be a good fit for you." Olivia spoke with caution, but conviction. "I know you haven't wanted to talk, but I think you really need to give it a try. I'll go with you, or your dad can, the first time if you want."

"I don't know…"

"Honey, I want this to be your decision, but I feel really strongly that you should talk to someone." Olivia said, not willing to back down at this point. "You don't have to battle all of this alone. Let people help you."

Charlie just looked up at her with watery eyes, but she refused to let anymore tears fall. What she saw, though, was a rock solid base with Olivia. She saw a woman that would never steer her wrong, so she needed to trust her and take this jump.

"Okay, Olivia," she said in a whisper. "Let's make the appointment for as soon as we get back."

Olivia just smiled and pulled the girl in for a side hug. She kissed her temple and whispered _I'm proud of you_ just loud enough to penetrate her heart. After letting that sit for a while, she decided to keep going.

"I've also been in touch with Trevor Langan," Olivia offered, hoping this wouldn't backfire as she watched Charlie's head snap up to look at her. "He's the lawyer that helped me get Noah and he's been following your case for a little while now. It might be a good idea for you, for us, to talk to him about some of your options."

"What options?" Charlie said with a little harshness to her tone. "Sounds like the prosecutor made all the choices for me."

"Well, maybe as far as criminal charges go, yes." Olivia said and held the girl's hand in her lap. "But I think you have several options as far as lawsuits against Josh, his family, and the university. Langan has already reached out to me with several ideas. He is also willing to help you write your Victim Impact Statement before the sentencing."

Charlie just sat there, looking at their joined hands, and taking deep breaths. She knew it would only be a matter of time before they were pushing her into therapy, but the idea of talking to a lawyer was a surprise. To say that she was wishing there was more she could do to stick it to everyone who allowed her life to become this way would be an understatement. So she finally looked up at Olivia with a steeled face.

"You trust him?" She asked, holding no opinion higher than that of Olivia Benson.

"I do," she said, portraying all the confidence in the world. But before Charlie could say anything else, Noah came bursting through the door with a huge grin and a messy t-shirt.

"Momma! Tar-lie! We back! We bringed you pancakes! And BACON!" Noah was literally jumping up and down as he delivered the news, and an overwhelmed looking Ed came trailing in behind him.

"We may have over-done it on the syrup and whipped cream…" he said, rubbing his hand on the back of his neck and watching the three year old bounce around. Charlie and Olivia just laughed at the look on Ed's face.

"You brought us food, so you're forgiven," Olivia said as she stood to kiss him on the lips. Noah decided to use that moment to crawl up on the stool next to Charlie.

"You all better now, Tar-lie?" He asked with wide eyes and Charlie just smiled at him.

"All better," she said.

* * *

 ** _Up Next: Their time at Lake George comes to an end. Ed and Olivia talk about next steps for their family. Also, was Noah calling Ed "daddy" a slip up? Or will it become more permanent?_**

 ** _Leave a review!_**


	33. Chapter 33

_**Sorry for the gap in updates. I got myself into a writing funk due to life craziness.**_

 _ **Lake George, Part VII**_

* * *

It was their last day at Lake George, and the little family was feeling the anxiety of having to head back to New York City. Ed and Olivia were sitting side by side in lounge chairs on the lake shore while they watched Charlie and Noah float around on the giant raft Ed had purchased upon arrival. The raft had a little ledge, so Charlie could prop up a bit and not worry about Noah tumbling off. The two seemed perfectly content to float around and play "Eye Spy".

"I love watching them together," Olivia said softly, without taking her eyes off of the duo. Ed just squeezed her hand.

"Me too," he said, before turning to face his fiancé. "Noah called me Daddy yesterday…"

That caught Olivia's attention as she snapped her eyes to meet Ed's.

"What? When? Why didn't you tell me?" She spoke fast and Ed couldn't figure out if she was upset or not.

"It was in the morning. He was telling me about Charlie's nightmare. I don't think he realized he said it." Tucker's voice barely hid his emotion about hearing that name from the three year old.

"Has he said it since then?" Liv asked, wondering if it was just a slip.

"No. But he hasn't used Captain either. He just tugs on my arm."

"He's probably confused…" Olivia said and then reached out to grab Ed's hand. "Is that something you are okay with?"

"Yeah," Ed allowed, trying not to sound too excited. "Definitely. I mean, I'm here for good. I want to be his dad."

Olivia took a deep breath and tried to swallow the emotion welling up in her throat.

"Maybe we can talk to him when we get home. See if he is wanting to call you daddy, but maybe he's not sure if it's okay. And we can tell him, together, that if he wants you to be Daddy, then that is very much okay. But that if he wants you to stay Captain, that's okay too."

"I like that idea," Ed said, then leaned over to peck Olivia's lips. "We have a good amount to figure out, though, about how we will keep working towards the four of us being a family…."

"Yeah," she sighed softly. "Maybe we should start with living arrangements when we get back to New York."

"I'm not sure I'm ready for Charlie to move back out on her own," Ed admitted, hoping that Olivia wouldn't come down on him for trying to smother his daughter. He just couldn't shake that fear of her being away from him right now. In time it would get better, but it hasn't even been three weeks since Josh's latest attack. He wanted her close.

"I don't think she's ready, either babe." Olivia said, hoping to make him feel better. "Though, I'm sure she's ready to have her own room. She is 24, almost 25."

"The alcove is okay temporarily, and it keeps her with us. But you're right, she needs her own space."

"What do you think about looking for a bigger place for us?" Olivia broached the subject carefully, knowing they were changing a lot in a short amount of time. They had already agreed they wanted to live together, but life had been so chaotic that neither one of them wanted to add more pressure.

"You think Charlie would stay with us?" Ed asked, really having no idea what his daughter would prefer.

"I don't know," Olivia mused. "We could find a place close to my current one, then give her the option of either moving with us or taking over my apartment."

"That's expensive though, Liv." Tucker looked at her like she was crazy, assuming her rent must be crazy high given her neighborhood and fancy building. But she looked down a bit, almost like she was embarrassed.

"I, uh, I own my apartment." She spoke quietly, almost as if people would judge her if they heard. "I have a significant savings thanks to my mom. After Lewis, I wanted to be as safe as possible. So I took the money and bought that apartment. Charlie could live there and only have to pay condo fees."

"Olivia, are you going to be okay moving? I mean, I know we are a few years out from Lewis, but I want you to feel safe." Ed spoke, making sure she knew that his priority was making sure his family was safe and secure. She just looked at him with a little smile.

"You make me feel safe. I don't need an apartment for that anymore. I have you." As she spoke, she looked directly into his eyes, finding nothing but love and security in them.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

* * *

"I can't believe this is our last night here," Charlie said, unable to hide the anxiousness in her voice while they all sat around the patio table for dinner. Ed had taken another run at the grill, and they were munching on perfectly prepared ribs and sausage. Noah was completely covered in barbecue sauce as he insisted that he eat the ribs just like everyone else, straight off the bone.

"It has been really nice to get away," Olivia mused. "I haven't been out of the city for this long since, well, maybe college."

"We live here?" Noah asked, looking up from his third giant rib.

"No, baby, we live in New York City. Aren't you excited to go back?" Olivia asked as she ran her fingers through his brown locks. He just looked up at her with a sauce covered face and those wide, curious eyes.

"I like here. Here good. Fishies and boats and no daycare." Noah said very commandingly, almost as if to communicate his displeasure with returning to his usual routine. Charlie decided to hope on his side.

"I wish we could live here too, Noah," Charlie said as she took a sip of her lemonade. "But maybe we can come back soon?"

"Absolutely." Ed confirmed. He had been staying quiet most of the meal, as his anxiety was beginning to rise as well. He still had not told Charlie that he would be turning his papers in as soon as they arrived home. It wasn't clear to him what he was afraid of, exactly. He obviously didn't want to upset his daughter any more than she already was. But he also didn't want her to be disappointed in him for giving in to the demands. He could have fought this, but it would have been at her expense. And quite frankly, that wasn't worth it to Ed. In his mind, retiring after 25+ years in the NYPD was not heartbreaking. He had put in his time. He was tired of being the most hated Captain in the entire force, as well. It was wearing on him. And now that he was with Olivia, it almost made sense to retire and take away that possible conflict of interest.

Olivia had noticed Ed's silence during the meal, and knew he was stewing about telling Charlie about his plans. So once she noticed Noah was done destroying his dinner, she got up.

"Okay, Noah…you are covered in barbecue sauce!" She exclaimed and tickled his belly causing him to giggle. "Let's get you in the bath."

"Otay, momma," he said and slowly got down from his chair. "But den I come back to play with Tar-lie?"

"You better," Charlie said and poked his nose, causing more giggles from the boy before he was wrapped up in a beach towel and taken to the tub. Charlie watched after them with a little smile, before turning back to her salad she had been picking at all night.

"You haven't eaten much," Ed observed as he polished off his second sausage.

"I'm not that hungry," she replied softly and finally put her fork down, wiping her hands on her shorts.

"Everything okay?" Ed asked, in his usual gruff-like fashion. He still was not completely sure how to connect to his daughter the way Olivia could.

"I guess," she started, then shook her head. "No, it's not okay. I just…the deal they made with him…I'm having a hard time with it. Which is stupid, I should just be happy. But, he'll never admit what he did to me."

Tucker just watched her as she spoke to him, freely, about how she was feeling. He could tell in her downcast eyes and forehead creases that Josh Miller still held a tremendous power over his daughter and it more than angered him.

"I can't begin to imagine how you feel right now," he began, hoping that he wasn't about to rock her world any more. "But, the important thing is that you survived. You are here, with your family, and we love you so much. Josh is in prison, and will be for a very long time. And you can live your life."

"I don't know how…" she said, before the tears began to cascade down her cheeks. "I don't know how to live my life right now. The past three years have been hell, and I don't know how to be normal anymore."

Ed's heart broke into a million pieces as he watched his daughter's shoulders shake from her cries. Of course she didn't know how to live her life right now, he thought. She's been running from him for years. He's shown up, randomly, in her life to hurt her for years. So he got up and went over to sit next to her and rubbed her back softly.

"It's going to be okay." he said with more emotion than she had ever heard in his voice. "You will be okay, and I'm going to be right here with you the entire time."

She finally looked up at him when he said that and searched his eyes. She knew he meant it, but the tone in his voice signaled something she couldn't quite identify. So just gave him this questioning look as her tears slowed. Ed took a deep breath and then went for it.

"Charlie, I've decided to put in my retirement papers when we get back from the lake."

There was a pause in the conversation as they both just looked at each other for a bit.

"What?" Charlie asked in a whisper. Maybe she misheard what he said.

"I'm retiring from the NYPD, Charlie. I'll give them a couple of weeks to find a replacement. But I've put in my time." He said, still unsure as to how to tell her to other piece of it. But he had to, or she would find out at the sentencing.

"Wow," she said and shook her head a bit. "Are you sure? That's a big step, dad."

"I'm sure," he said confidently. "There is one thing you should probably know. But it doesn't take away from the fact that I'm ready to retire, okay?"

"Dad…." Charlie said, nervously. "Just say it, I can't deal with more anxiety."

"The only way Josh was going to plead out, and not attempt to come after me for the shooting, was if I did this." He spoke and looked directly into her eyes, so she knew there was no question in his mind that it was the right decision. But he watched as her eyes got large.

"He…what?"

"Part of the deal for Josh to plead to the higher charges was for me to put in my papers."

"Dad…" Charlie whispered, and the tears started to well up again.

"Hey," Ed leaned over and grabbed her hands, kissing them, then looking back at her. "I want to do this, okay? I'm not upset about it. I've been NYPD for over 25 years. Retirement was coming soon, anyways. This way I can be here 100% for you, Liv, and Noah."

"Wow…" she breathed out and squeezed his hands tighter. She couldn't believe her dad was doing this for her. Being a police officer was the one thing Charlie always assumed that he loved more than her. But now, he was giving it up so that she wouldn't have to go to trial against a man who had raped her for three years. It was overwhelming.

"I know it is a lot to take in," he offered. "But the one thing I don't want you feeling is guilt, okay? I've never been more sure about anything in my life."

"Dad?" Charlie spoke in a soft, shaky voice.

"Yeah?" Ed asked, holding his breath as he wasn't sure what she was about to say. After a brief pause, he heard the softest, yet sweetest, answer.

"Thank you…"

* * *

5am rolled around quickly, and Ed was wide awake in bed. Olivia was tucked in soundly to his side as her soft breathing filled his ears. He hadn't slept much that night, and he wasn't sure why. His talk with Charlie went okay, or so he thought. But something was still bothering him. Maybe it was the pure anguish in her voice when she talked about not knowing what to do next. Or maybe he was really feeling the weight of his decision to retire. Either way, he was restless. And now on a mission to wake up his fiancé for a little distraction.

He started by slowly running his fingertips up and down her thigh, stopping to make little circles on her hip, before descending again down behind her knees. When that didn't work, he dipped his head and began to kiss and nip at her shoulder, slowly moving up to her neck. He flicked his tongue in circles behind her ear and was rewarded with a breathy moan. He pulled back, and noticed her lips were in a smirk, so he took that as a sign to continue. As he sucked on her neck, he moved his hand to her behind and pulled her flush against him so she could feel his arousal. Another moan escaped her lips, and that's all it took. He rolled her onto her back and slowly began to undress her. Olivia's eyes were now open and she was watching him with nothing but desire all over her face.

As Ed finally got rid of her pants, he began to kiss and lick at her ankle, working his way up. Calf. Knee. Thigh. Hip. Bellybutton. Finally he reached her breasts and dove in with his mouth and hands. Olivia gripped his hair and arched into him as her breathing sped up. She finally yanked his head up to hers and kissed him hungrily. Ed pulled back for air and looked down at her. Completely naked, hair fanned out around her face, and no makeup. She was beautiful.

"I love you so much," he said in a whisper.

"I love you too," she responded. "I know you are nervous about getting back to the city. I am too. But for now, just love me."

"Whatever you want, baby," he said and went back to kissing her neck as he slowly thrust into her. She was home for him. Everything else could wait.

* * *

 _ **Up Next: Ed officially retires from the NYPD**_

 ** _Don't forget to leave a review!_**


	34. Chapter 34

_**Back from Lake George and back to reality for our favorite family.**_

* * *

"I think you have enough solid evidence to file lawsuits against the school, the Miller family, and Miller himself." Trevor said, concluding his explanation of what all of this would entail. They sat in the lounge outside of his office, Charlie on the couch between Ed and Olivia while Trevor sat in the chair next to it. He had papers spread out on the coffee table in front of them, each explaining the different steps Charlie could take. Tucker had been skeptical of this meeting at first, not really having positive feelings about Trevor Langan. But Olivia seemed to trust the guy after he got her Noah, so he was taking a leap of faith. The tone of the conversation had been gentle, which relaxed him a bit. Trevor had been incredibly sympathetic and understanding about Charlie's situation and also seemed to realize that she wouldn't be super forthcoming with information. She was sitting there with a death grip on Olivia's hand, and Ed had done a good bit of the talking. Though Trevor was going to need more information than Ed knew and that is what they are getting to.

"Do you have any questions so far, Charlie?" Trevor asked in a gentle but strong tone.

"How hard and awful will this be, if I do it?" She asked with the trepidation clear in her voice. The girl was tired.

"Well, some of it depends on the other information I need from you. Who all at the university knew what happened, what kind of documentation you have of their refusal to accommodate you, how much information was passed between the police and the school, do you still have copies of the written threats Mr. Miller made to you, and just how much we find that his father had to do with this." Trevor was being honest, but it all overwhelmed Charlie. She reached into her tote bag and produced a large accordion file that neither Ed nor Olivia knew about.

"What's in that?" Tucker asked his daughter as she clutched at the green container tightly. She just closed her eyes and tried to take deep breaths. Olivia gave Ed a look, meaning for him to cut it out, and she took her free hand to play with Charlie's hair a bit.

"Is that what Trevor is wanting?" She asked softly, hoping that she could get her to talk a bit. Charlie turned to look up at Olivia, her face completely pale, but she nodded her head.

"Yes. Everything is in here." She whispered, but didn't move to hand over the file. Trevor leaned forward and lightly touched Charlie's arm as he spoke slowly.

"Charlie, I'm working for you, okay? You have complete control. Showing me what is in that file won't mean anything other than that I've seen it. I will not act on anything without your permission." Trevor spoke and Charlie visibly loosened up a bit, but not a lot. Tucker, once again, was surprised at how well Trevor was handling this situation and how Charlie was responding to him. He watched closely as Charlie handed Trevor the file.

"Thank you, Charlie, for trusting me with this," He spoke and Charlie nodded. "Is it alright if I take a look inside right now?"

"Sure," she said. "I could use a bathroom break, is that okay?"

"Absolutely, Olivia you know where they are," he said. "I'll just look through this with your dad, okay?"

"Okay." The women got up to leave, and as soon as the door was closed Ed let out a deep breath and ran his hand over his face.

"She's a strong kid, Tucker" Trevor said, hoping to gain the man's trust.

"She really is. And I guarantee we still don't know the half of it."

"Well, let's find out what we are missing," Trevor said and opened up the file.

* * *

It was pushing 3pm, and Olivia was beginning to worry about where Ed had gone. They had all returned home after an emotionally draining meeting with Trevor, and Charlie had gone straight for the bath and narcotics. Now that she was sleeping peacefully on her bed, Olivia was texting Ed. He had gone out for a run, but that was over an hour ago, and they needed to be down at 1PP for his meeting with the Chief at 5.

 _Where the hell are you?_

After another 20 minutes with no response, she grabbed her keys and phone, left a quick note in case the kids woke up, and set out to look for him. Her first stop to the building's exercise room proved fruitful, as she opened the door and watched a very sweaty Ed Tucker beat the crap out of a punching bag. If she didn't fully understand why he was in such a mood, watching him do this would be a complete turn on. She approached slowly, and went to the opposite side of the bag so he could see her. He landed one last punch, and then stopped, completely out of breath.

"Liv, what are you doing here?" He asked as he grabbed his towel from the floor and started wiping off.

"You've been gone for two hours." She said pointedly, hoping he would register her worry. He did, kind of.

"Yeah, sorry, just needed to blow off more steam." He said and made his way to the bench to his water bottle. Olivia just stood still and watched him. If she didn't know any better, she would have said she could see the steam pouring from his body. He was angry in a way she hadn't seen in a long time, if ever. His hands were shaking, his face was red, and his muscles were bulging. She also noticed he wouldn't make eye contact with her, which was telling.

"You want to tell me what's going on?" She asked, with her hands on her hips. He just grunted and continued to drink his water until it was gone, then threw the bottle across the room.

"Hey! What the hell, Ed?" Olivia said with a raised voice. He just dropped his head into his hands and shook his head back and forth. Liv slowly made her way over to him and sat down, just waiting for him to decide to talk to her.

"He terrorized her," he said through gritted teeth, but still had his head in his hands. "He fucking terrorized her, Olivia."

"You're talking about what you and Langan found in her file?"

Ed just turned his head and looked at her, incredulously.

"You think it's just her file that I'm upset about?" He asked, not quite understanding his emotion and knowing he shouldn't take it out on her, but he couldn't hold it in anymore.

"That's not what I meant…" she said softly, reading his eyes and seeing he was on the verge of snapping.

"I can't talk about this right now, Olivia." He abruptly stood up and headed for the door. "I need to shower so I can go fucking retire."

* * *

"Momma?" Noah called as he crawled his way into the lap of Olivia, who was sitting on the couch and staring at the blank television. Once Tucker had showered and dressed, he seemed to be a bit better, but decided to go to 1PP alone, much to Olivia's surprise. They had planned to go down together, so she could support him, then hit up their favorite bar on the way home. But at the last minute, he told her this was something he needed to do on his own. So now she was sitting on the couch and worrying about how it was going.

"Yes, sweet boy?"

"I hungry." He said and looked at her with his usual wide eyes.

"You are? What would you like for dinner?" Olivia asked, silently cursing herself for forgetting about dinner and the fact she needed to feed her three year old. Charlie should eat something too, since she had taken her pain pills earlier.

"Hmmmm." Noah said, and tapped his chin with his finger. "Tie-neese pasketi?"

Olivia just chuckled at Noah's name for veggie lo mein.

"It's called Lo Mein, Noah," she said. "Can you say Lo Mein?"

"No. It Tie-neese pasketi."

"Okay, baby boy." Olivia just conceded, knowing not to argue with her adorable, yet opinionated, son.

"Tar-lie say Tie-neese pasketi too." He stated, fully believing that if his Charlie said something, it was the only way it could be.

"Oh she does, does she?" Olivia asked and began to tickle the little boy. Noah's laughter filled the apartment and soon had Charlie wandering in to see what she was missing out on.

"Uh oh," she said, teasingly. "Is it tickle Noah time?"

"Noooooooooo!" Noah roared through his laughter. "Tar-lie, no!"

Charlie tickled him with Olivia for a bit, then rescued him by grabbing him up for a big hug. She winced a bit as she picked him up, but ignored the pain. His hugs were the best. She couldn't stand with him long, so the two of them collapsed on the couch next to Olivia.

"So, Chinese for everyone?" Olivia asked as she watched the two get settled into a full-on couch cuddle.

"Sounds good to me," Charlie said and looked at her future mother. "Dad's been gone a while?"

Olivia just nodded and checked the time on their DVR. He had left about three hours ago, and should have been home by now. But she was letting it go for a bit before getting worried. He clearly needed to just clear his head, and their kids needed them. So she would stay with them while he did what he needed to do.

"Yeah, but he's probably chatting it up with all the people at 1PP." Olivia said with a little smile. "You'd be surprised how nostalgic cops can get when one of their own retires."

"Yeah…." Charlie said, but Olivia could pick up on the uneasy tone. "Is he really okay with retiring?"

"I think so, yes." Olivia responded truthfully.

"But…it's still not fair," Charlie said while rubbing her nose on Noah's forehead as he laid comfortably against her.

"No, it's not. But I think this is for the best, Charlie. Your dad wants to be here to you and for Noah. And he's given most of his life to the NYPD. He's lost a lot because of it. He's ready. Trust me on this, okay?"

"I do trust you, Olivia."

"Good," she said and smiled at her before standing up and pulling her phone out. "Okay, am I ordering the usual?"

* * *

The musty smell of the Hell's Kitchen dive bar was almost too much for Olivia to handle as she made her way down the stairs and into the dimly lit room to scan for her fiancé. She didn't have to look long, because he was sitting slumped over the bar holding what seemed to be an empty glass of bourbon. She wanted to be angry with him for acting this way, and worrying both her and Charlie all night, but one look at him and she knew he was in more pain than she first thought. Suddenly very grateful that he texted her, she made her way over and sat down next to him, slowly taking the glass from his hands. He looked up at her through hooded, drunk eyes and she could see the sign of tears he was holding back.

"How many have you had?" She asked and tried to catch the eye of the bartender to get the check.

"Not enough" he responded, slowly and pretty slurred.

"Oh, I beg to differ" Olivia responded with a smirk and raised eyebrow. She nodded her thanks to the bartender as he dropped off the bill and she dug for her credit card.

"You don't…understand," he said, clearly having a hard time speaking due to how inebriated he was. "I can still feel the pain."

Olivia stopped what she was doing and just looked at him, her heart cracking in two.

"Oh, baby…" she said and moved to stand by him, running her hand through his short hair. "Come on home. Be with your family."

"I can't get it out of my head, Liv."

"What?" She asked, stroking his face while he tried to talk.

"All of it. I keep picturing her face, hearing her screams. Her cries. Imagining how terrified she was, non stop." As he spoke, Olivia's heart continued to shatter. It was incredible how much pain this one man had caused her family. "I can't get it out of my head, Liv."

"You need to, okay?" Olivia said, realizing she needed to pull him together in that moment.

"I can't…"

"Yes. You can," Olivia's voice was stern as she stood in front of Tucker and made him look into her eyes. "Ed Tucker, you have to pull yourself together. Your daughter needs you. And she needs you to not be drunk at a run down bar. She needs you to not be wallowing in your own self pity. She needs her father. Her strong, genuine, amazing, loving father who would do anything for his little girl. That's what she needs right now. And that's what you are going to give her."

"I'm no longer a cop…."

"Yes, you are. You are a highly decorated NYPD Captain who retired a hero. That Captain gave up everything for his family, after protecting the people of New York City for 25 years." Olivia continued to speak to him, slowly pulling him out of his funk. "And that Captain is now going to go home with his fiance, who loves him so much. And he's going to eat leftover Chinese food with his daughter who is worried sick about him. And then he's going to sleep off this hellish night. And when he wakes up tomorrow? He's going to realize it will all be okay. Because we are together. And that is all that matters."

* * *

 ** _Up Next: We jump ahead in time a bit with Josh's sentencing. Also, Munch makes a special appearance._**

 ** _Leave a review and let me know what you think!_**


	35. Chapter 35

_**I struggled with this chapter, but hope I did the story justice in the way I decided to tell it. It has several heavy moments, but they were necessary to bring light to what victims of crime go through in the quest for justice, which is one of the biggest reasons I began this story. Thanks to those who offered encouragement along the way. I welcome your thoughts!**_

 ** _*Four Months Later*_**

* * *

Rafael Barba, who had been working closely with the DA on Charlotte Tucker's case, sat with an intense glare in the courtroom. He had yet to turn around and make eye contact with Charlie, Liv, or Ed out of fear of losing his composure. The DA had asked him to speak to the judge at the sentencing, hoping that his vast experience with SVU and his personal commitment to Olivia would bring a more impassioned plea. But he was nervous. He thought he might even be more nervous than he was the first time he faced William Lewis, which was telling. He glanced to his right and saw Trevor Langan sitting off to the side, notepad in hand, ready to take notes on anything that could help him if Charlie decided to file lawsuits. _Good_ , Barba thought. _Sue these people for everything they are worth_. To his left, seated behind Josh Miller, were his parents and someone Barba assumed to be a brother. Behind them there were a few other men in suits, but he had no clue who they could be.

He finally took a deep breath and turned around as the judge called them to order. What he saw only fueled his anger and commitment. Charlie was sitting in between Ed and Olivia, eyes closed and taking deep, ragged breaths. Ed was sitting stone faced, with a redness to his neck that he only saw when the man was angry. And Olivia had a fixated, evil stare at Josh Miller, who was sitting and looking smug. Behind them were Finn, Rollins, Carisi, and a couple of IAB officers who Barba couldn't quite remember their names. In any case, Charlotte Tucker was sitting in that courtroom with the backing of the entire NYPD. He just had to hope that had an impact on the judge.

"ADA Barba, you may address the court."

"Thank you, Your Honor," he said confidently as he rose from his seat and began a slow, deliberate pace in front of Judge Evans, treating the defense to a few moments of silence before stopping to look directly at Josh Miller.

"For the last three years, Charlotte Tucker, a bright and vibrant young college student…who went to school on an academic scholarship and an athletic scholarship…who made the Dean's list her freshman year, when most students are partying…who now holds a coveted position at ESPN at the young age of 24, has been running from a psychopath. A psychopath who is sitting in this courtroom, surrounded by his daddy's lawyers, and sending smirks towards a traumatized young woman. This…man…repeatedly raped and threatened Miss Tucker. He followed her across state lines. He beat her. Tortured her. He so wanted control of her, that he threatened two decorated NYPD officers and their three year old son. He so wanted to control over her that he shot her father, an NYPD Captain…."

As he continued his statement, Charlie held tight to Ed and Olivia's hands with her eyes closed in fear of making eye contact with Josh. She heard Barba's words as he tirelessly fought for her. Never, in the 3+ years of this hell, had anyone fought for her like he was in this moment. For years, no one believed her or helped her. And now here she was, her family surrounding her, and a powerful lawyer fighting for her. She had little faith that any of it would work, but just hearing the words…hearing someone fight for her…gave her just a tiny bit of strength and hope that she would be okay. So she continued to sit, head down and eyes closed, with the tightest grip she could muster onto her Dad and Olivia. Occasionally, Liv would lean over and kiss her temple while Ed would squeeze her hand, trying to keep her grounded.

"…In conclusion, while he may not have admitted to the numerous rapes on Miss Tucker, this psychopath poses an incredible threat to her, her family, and to the citizens of the United States. I beg you, Your Honor, to look at that young woman. Look at her family. You tell me that they don't deserve whatever justice we can give them. Look them in the eyes and tell them that you won't throw the book at Josh Miller. Because I don't think you can. That man should never see daylight again. He knows that. I know that. They know that. And you, Judge Evans, you know that as well."

Barba stayed standing, making eye contact with the judge, then turning to glare once more at Josh Miller, who just returned a smirk. He then made his way confidently back to his seat, stealing a glance at the trio. Charlie had tears streaming down her face, but she was still looking down. Olivia and Ed were stoic. As he sat down, he prayed to a God he wasn't sure he believed in that what he said would be enough.

* * *

"Will the Defendant please rise," Judge Evans bellowed out in the small courtroom.

Charlie sucked in a breath and dug her nails into Ed and Olivia's hands. She was shaking out of fear and emotion at this point. After sitting through Barba's statement, they had to endure the Defense Attorney and Josh addressing the judge. As soon as he sat down, he turned around and locked eyes with Charlie. It was at that point she made a beeline for the exit, while Olivia scrambled to follow her. She found the girl hunched over the toilet, heaving heavily as she choked on sobs. Olivia held her tightly, whispering words of strength and comfort, until she could get her up and back into the courtroom for the judge's decision.

As Josh Miller stood up, Olivia shifted to put her arm around the girl and give her left hand a break from the nail punctures. Charlie's eyes stayed closed and her head stayed down, as if she were paralyzed in fear and shame. It felt like forever before the judge spoke again.

"Mr. Miller, you have pled guilty to the following charges: One count, Attempted Murder of a Police Officer. Two counts, 1st Degree Assault. One count, Possession of an Illegal Firearm. One count, Breaking and Entering. Is that correct?"

"Yes, Your Honor." Josh spoke, still with a smug look on his face, almost daring the judge to throw the book at him. He turned around and looked at Charlie, knowing that it killed her that he wouldn't admit to raping her. But she wouldn't look up at him.

"I would like to go on record that I am loathe to be accepting this so-called deal you have made. Given what I have read in the probation report, the victim impact statement, the family's impact statement, and what I've heard today in this courtroom. The only reason I am not denying this flat out is because of that young woman over there, who already has her life in shambles because of the failure of our justice system. I refuse to be the one who insists that she be re-traumatized by going to trial."

Judge Evans took a deep breath and stared at Josh Miller, trying to size him up. His parents sat behind him, looking every bit as smug and pretentious as he did standing before him. This young man clearly felt no remorse for what he had done.

"Joshua Miller, I am sentencing you to no less than 40 years in federal prison. After 40 years, you may be eligible for parole, depending upon another evaluation of your behavior and progress while serving your sentence. This hearing is adjourned."

As soon as the gavel hit, Charlie dissolved into a fit of harsh tears, almost to the point of hyperventilating. Olivia pulled her as close as she could as Ed kept his hands on her shoulders and kissed the back of her head.

"It's over," Olivia whispered, unsure if Charlie could even hear her. "It's over, baby. It's over."

A commotion in the courtroom startled the trio, and caused them to turn their heads. They saw 2 court officers cuffing Josh and beginning to lead him away. Before they made it to the door, he managed to turn around in their grasp and look directly at Charlie. He gave her a smirk and licked his lips before mouthing _"You're mine"_ as he was shoved out the side door.

"Nooooooo," Charlie whimpered just loudly enough for Barba to turn his head in time to see her throw up all over the bench, the floor, and Ed. He rushed over and took his jacket off to wrap around the girl and help Olivia get her standing up. The two of them practically carried her out of the courtroom, while Ed just sat frozen with his eyes closed at the enormity of what just took place. Several officers and staff came in immediately to help clean up and offer Tucker assistance. As he finally stood up to leave the courtroom, he locked eyes with the federal prosecutor who had carried this case for it's entirety.

"Thank you," he mouthed, before walking slowly out to find his fiance and daughter.

* * *

"Easy does it," Ed spoke softly to Charlie as he unlocked the door to the apartment, and then turned to help Olivia get her inside. It had taken them an hour to get her calm enough to head home and now that they were there she could barely stand up from exhaustion. They were fortunate to be coming home to an empty apartment, so they had time to get her settled before a Noah invasion. Olivia had reached out to John Munch once the sentencing date had been set and he jumped at the chance to corrupt his honorary nephew. Olivia had given him the head's up that Charlie was not holding up well, so Munch offered to take Noah for dinner at his favorite Jewish diner so they could get settled.

As Ed turned around to lock up the apartment, Olivia continued to slowly move Charlie back towards the master bedroom.

"How about we get you a bath drawn, you take your anxiety pills, and then you can bury yourself in my bed, okay?" She spoke softly as they moved. Charlie didn't give a response, but wasn't resisting so Olivia took that as an affirmation to continue with her plan. But once they got into the bedroom, the girl just collapsed onto the bed signaling that the bath could happen later. Olivia grabbed a glass of water and her anxiety pills and went to sit next to her.

"Here, take two of these," she said, handing her the pills then the glass of water. Charlie's hands shook as she took a sip, but she managed to gulp it down and not spill anything.

"Thanks, Liv," she said with a raspy voice. It was the first time she had spoken since they left the courtroom. Olivia reached over to grab her Ponds face wipes from the nightstand and busied herself wiping the girl's face, hoping it would help soothe her.

"I'm right here, sweet girl," she said softly as she finished up with her face and went to cover her up with a blanket. Charlie just grasped her wrist and looked up at her.

"I love you," she said in a whisper and Olivia's heart just swelled up.

"I love you too, Charlie. It's going to be okay now. You just rest."

* * *

An hour later, Olivia slipped out of the bedroom and softly closed the door behind her. As she made her way out into the living room, the soft sound of Noah chatting to Ed and Munch filled her ears and made her smile.

"Momma!" Noah exclaimed happily and scampered up to her. "Uncle Munchie take me to his diner! It a Jewish diner. I eated pickles and nishes."

"Nishes?" Olivia asked and looked to John for clarification as she scooped Noah up for a hug.

"I believe Sir Noah is referring to a Knish," Munch said, standing up to kiss Olivia on the cheek.

"Dat what I said, Uncle Munchie! Nishes!" Noah exclaimed, clearly not impressed with someone translating his words.

"Did you have fun?" Olivia asked and bounced him a bit, causing him to giggle. It was amazing how Noah could brighten an entire room full of emotional adults.

"Yessssss," he said with an exaggerated nod. "We read books, go to pond and chase the fish, then eat 'pecial Jewish food. I bringed Tar-lie some, too!"

"Oh she will be so happy you did that. Once she wakes up, I'm sure she will want to hear all about your afternoon," Ed said as he moved over to ruffle the boy's head and squeeze Olivia's shoulder. "I'm going to grab a seltzer, can I get you anything?"

"No thanks, Captain. I have a hot date tonight." Munch said with a teasing glance at Olivia.

"Oh really now?"

"Well, no, but I do want to go home and take a nap. As much fun as I had with Sir Noah, I'm exhausted."

Olivia just laughed and shook her head.

"Thanks again, John. It was a huge help knowing that Noah was happy and taken care of today."

"Anytime, Liv," he said. "I mean it. You all settle in tonight, okay?"

"We will…" Olivia said, though the uncertainty was evident in her voice. Munch stepped closer and patted her shoulder.

"It's over, and you are all together. That is what counts," he said and then turned to leave. Olivia swallowed the tears welling up just in time to get Noah to say by to his uncle.

"Say bye to Munch, Noah." she spoke softly to him as he turned his head to the door.

"Bye Uncle Munchie," he whispered as he laid his head on his mom's shoulders. Olivia kissed his head and took in his smell. Things weren't okay right now, by a long shot, but John was right. They were together. That had to count for something.

* * *

 ** _Up Next: Aftermath of the sentencing._**

 ** _Review, review!_**


	36. Chapter 36

_**So sorry for the lag in updates! Life has basically knocked me down, but I'm back along with our favorite family...**_

* * *

Noah was quietly coloring a picture at the coffee table, while Ed and Olivia sat motionless on the couch. To say it had been an exhausting day would be the world's biggest understatement. The enormity of the sentencing, coupled with watching Charlie fall apart, had the couple at a loss for what to do next. So they sat in silence, watching a three year old color a card for his older sister.

"What now?" Ed asked, almost monotone, as he squeezed Olivia's hand a bit tighter. It had been a rough few months for Ed, being as he was officially retired. He was busying himself with odd jobs around the apartment and caring for Noah once he finished his half-day preschool program. Being Mr. Mom had it's perks, but it was still a big adjustment for a man who was used to working 80 hours a week.

"We live our lives," Olivia said quietly, but with wisdom deeper than most people. "We stand by Charlie. We keep her in counseling. We finish up Christmas shopping. We just, continue on."

"I totally forgot that Christmas is a few weeks away…" Ed mumbled as he rubbed his hand over his face. It was early December, and even though the family had already put up the Christmas tree and decorations, they were having a hard time getting into the spirit.

"Well, we've had a few things happening. The sentencing, you moving in, not being able to find a bigger place we like," Olivia mused. "Getting into the Christmas spirit just wasn't a priority. Tho, now it can be?"

"Absolutely," Ed responded while pulling her close and kissing her forehead. "It's our family's first Christmas together."

Olivia just looked up at him with watery eyes and smiled. Given the year they all had, it was not lost on either of them just how miraculous this Christmas would be.

"I love you." she said, quietly to him.

"I love you too," he responded. "Maybe once we get through the holiday, we can look at destinations for our wedding."

Olivia just kept staring at him for a while then leaned up to kiss him softly.

"That sounds perfect."

* * *

"Tar-lie?"

Noah was standing in the doorway of the master bedroom, hoping that his Charlie would be awake and ready for his arrival. He clutched a wrapped knish in his hand and waited patiently for her to respond.

"Hey, Noah," she said sleepily as she sat up and rubbed her eyes. She scooted back and leaned against the headboard, then opened her arms signaling to the little boy he could climb up. Noah wasted no time as he scurried across the room and leapt onto the bed, landing on her legs with a giggle.

"I bringed you soo-prise!" Noah said still clutching the little bag and looking at Charlie with excited eyes. He was literally bouncing with excitement.

"You did?" She asked, in a somewhat fake enthusiasm but Noah didn't notice. "What is it?"

"It a NISH!" He exclaimed proudly, and handed her the brown paper sack. She looked curiously inside, since she really had no idea what he was talking about. Even after she pulled out the delicacy, she was still unsure.

"Me and Uncle Munchie go to Jewish diner and bringed this back for you. It po-ta-to. It good." He explain, as Charlie continued to examine the square, fried piece of food. She wasn't hungry at this point, but knew Noah would be devastated if she didn't enjoy his surprise, so she took a small bite. It actually tasted good to her, being it was mainly just potato, so she smiled and took another bite.

"See Tar-lie? Nishes good." He said confidently then leaned up, hoping to steal a bite. Charlie just laughed and tore it in half so they could split it. Noah happily took his half and munched quickly, still sitting on Charlie's legs and watching her eat too.

"Nish make you feel better, Tar-lie?" He asked innocently between bites. Ed and Olivia had gently explained to Noah that Charlie was sad because she had to see the "bad man" today. Noah immediately got upset, but Olivia assured him the bad man was now in jail and would never hurt anyone again. The young boy was very in tune with the feelings of his family, and he also seemed to posses and depth of understanding that surprised people. Ed had once told Olivia that it was because she was his mom, and she was teaching him to have deep compassion. With Olivia Benson for a mother, the tyke had no choice but to inherit that same compassion and pull to help people.

"A little," Charlie said. "But you definitely make me feel better."

Noah just grinned at her, took his last bit of knish, then made his way to her side and cuddled up with her. She pulled him close and kissed the top of his head, causing him to look up at her.

"Momma said the bad guy went to jail, Tar-lie. Dat good," he said softly, repeating what he had been told. "Dat means he won't hurt you 'gain, right?"

Charlie locked eyes with the little boy and saw his little three year old heart through his expression.

"Right, Noah, he can't hurt me or anyone else" Charlie voice was soft as she spoke, given it was the first time she had really said anything about the hearing or given clear thought to the idea that Josh Miller would be behind bars for a long time. Noah squeezed his little arms around her as tightly as he could, and she returned the sentiment.

"Dat good, Tar-lie. I lub you." He said and closed his eyes as he relished in their cuddle. Charlie swallowed the cries bubbling up, but couldn't stop the tears from flowing down her cheeks. That is when she noticed the two adults standing in the doorway, watching their little exchange. Olivia had a lone tear falling, while Ed just smiled at the scene.

"Do you think you can eat something more?" Ed asked Charlie, hoping to get a little more food in her stomach, seeing as she vomited most of it out earlier.

"Yeah, I think so," Charlie said. "Nothing crazy though."

"How about I run over to Tony's and get some different pasta dishes?" Ed offered, grabbing his wallet of the dresser. "Then we can all play a game or just pile in the bed and watch a movie?"

"PAN!" Noah yelled in excitement. The adults chuckled and Olivia rolled her eyes.

"Noah, let's pick a different movie ok?" She said as gently as possible. Noah immediately sat up and gave her a look of shock.

"No, no other movie good," he said in his little opinionated voice. Olivia raised her eyebrow at him.

"You sure?" She asked and then went over to her nightstand and pulled out a DVD she had intended to use as a stocking stuffer, and handed it to him. "Not even this?"

Noah's eyes got wide as he held the new DVD. After a few moments, his shock wore off and he turned to shove it in Charlie's face.

"Tar-lie look it! Momma buyed me CARS 2!" Charlie didn't have to fake her excitement this time, as she was more than relieved to not have to sit through another showing of Peter Pan.

"Oh, let's watch that, pal!" She exclaimed and then went to get up. "But first, I need to shower and change."

"Hey Noah, want to go with me to Tony's?" Ed asked, hoping to give the women a bit of space.

"I get cookie?" He asked, trying to decide if the trip was going to yield anything good.

"You aren't full after the diner?" Olivia asked, teasing him a bit. Noah shook his head furiously.

"Don't worry, Momma. I leave room for cookie."

* * *

A freshly showered Charlie made her way out to the kitchen wearing leggings and her dad's NYPD sweatshirt. There was something incredibly soothing about the warm white lights from the tree radiating through the living room, with a NYC skyline in the background. After the day they had, Charlie knew they all needed to be soothed. She checked the clock and saw it was almost 7pm. She could really go for a coffee, though, so started to brew a pot of decaf hazelnut. Her dad would mock her, but Olivia would enjoy it too. As she waited for it to brew, she glanced around wondering if Olivia had decided to go with her dad and Noah. As if she read her thoughts, the apartment door opened and in walked Olivia.

"Hey Charlie," she said a bit breathlessly. "Making coffee?"

"Yeah, decaf hazelnut. Dad can get over it," she said with a little laugh and Olivia smiled. It was a relief to see a little humor and life back in the young woman. "You doing laundry?"

"No, I actually went up to see a vacant apartment about six floors up," she said slowly, watching how Charlie reacted. When the girl seemed okay and interested, she continued. "It has three bedrooms and a terrace. In decent shape, but will need some work. I haven't told your dad about it yet, but it might be perfect for all of us."

Charlie just watched her for a bit, unsure if she meant that she would be moving with them or not. Again, Olivia read her thoughts.

"I was thinking you could either move in with us, or you could keep my apartment," she spoke quickly and with her hands, almost as if she was nervous. "Or even both, really. I own this apartment, so you could live with us for a while then move in here when you are ready. I think…well, I just want you to be close by, if at all possible."

Charlie just stood there watching the woman in front of her explain all of this to her. She was a little bit in awe of how much Olivia would think to include her when making plans for her family. It had been obvious that they were looking for an apartment recently, but Charlie just tried to ignore it as she was unsure what that would mean for her. Now here she was, feeling silly that she even thought Olivia would exclude her from their plans. The woman had not once done something that did not prove that Charlie was a member of their family, even when it was a bit awkward.

"Don't think about it now, sweetheart," Olivia jumped in, realizing now was not the time. "You've had a rough day. We will talk this through when we are all a little more clear in the head."

Charlie just smiled at her and took a sip of her hot coffee. She turned around and fixed Olivia a cup, just how she liked it, and handed it across the bar.

"Here, Olivia," she said softly, her voice still scratchy from all of the emotion from the day.

"Thanks, Charlie."

"No, thank you…for everything."

* * *

"Hey Noah, let's pop in here." Ed said quickly, as he steered the boy into a ma and pop jewelry store next to Tony's. He had an idea as to what to get his girls for Christmas and thought this would be a good time to check it out. They had just ordered the meals and had about half an hour to kill before it was all ready.

"Whoa! Pretty." Noah exclaimed as he examined the different necklaces and bracelets. Ed held tightly to his hand, but patiently let him look in all the glass cases. Finally a salesperson noticed them and came over.

"May I help you, sir?"

"Yes, I'm looking for a Christmas gift for my daughter and fiance," Ed said confidently. "I saw something in your store window last month that I thought would be perfect. But I don't see it now."

"Can you describe the piece?"

Ed went on to explain what he was looking for, while Noah stood patiently by his side and following his every word. The salesperson nodded away and then went into the back to see what he could come up with for them. As they waited, Ed squatted down so he could be eye level with Noah.

"Okay, Noah. This needs to be a man-to-man secret, okay?" Noah looked at him very seriously and nodded.

"Otay, Daddy. I keep see-cret," he said and Ed's breath caught once again. Daddy. "Dis be Noah and Daddy see-cret."

Ed had to keep his emotions in check, so the little boy wouldn't think something was wrong. Instead he just gave him a smile and pulled him in for a tight hug.

"Exactly," he said softly. "It is a Noah and Daddy secret."

Just then the man reappeared with two purple boxes that looked about the size to hold a necklace. He beckoned them over to the counter, placing the open boxes in front of them. Ed lifted Noah up so they could both look.

"Dat pretty, Daddy." Noah said softly, as if speaking loudly would ruin their secret. Ed nodded in agreement.

"You are right Noah. I think they are perfect. Do you?" He nodded quickly in agreement, so Ed informed the man they would take the necklaces. As they waited for him to ring up the total, Noah laid his head on Ed's shoulders.

"Dis a good see-cret, Daddy. Momma and Tar-lie be soo-prised?"

"You bet, bud."

"Good," he said and then pulled his head up and used his little hands to turn Ed's face to him. "Now I need dat cookie, Daddy."

"Whatever you want, buddy," Ed said softly. "Whatever you want."

* * *

 ** _Up Next: Christmas!_**

 ** _Make sure to leave a review and let me know what you think! Not too many chapters left..._**


	37. Chapter 37

_**Christmas Day**_

* * *

Olivia stepped back into the bedroom after a quick shower, and found Ed laying on his side just staring at her. He had woken her before the sun came up with kisses all over her body, which had quickly turned into a quick, but passionate Christmas morning romp. She finally pried herself out of his grip to shower so she didn't smell like sex while opening presents.

"I thought you were going to get the coffee going?" She asked as she threw on some dark leggings and a light blue snowflake sweater. He just kept watching every move she made. It was still strange to her, at times, when she realized just how enamored Ed was with her. She knew he loved her, but sometimes the intensity of it was overwhelming.

"I did," he said simply. "It's brewing. But I wanted to come back with you."

"No signs of Noah stirring?"

"He's curled up in Charlie's bed, sound asleep. Though I anticipate that will change soon." Ed replied as he finally stood up, wearing just his boxers, and sauntered over to Olivia. He pulled her close to him and touched his nose to hers. "Merry Christmas, baby."

"Merry Christmas, my love." She replied and kissed him softly as they swayed a bit in the darkened bedroom. "It's our first Christmas all together."

"It is," he responded in a gravelly tone, but kept a tight grip on Olivia. "I just want to relish in this day."

She met his eyes and could see the emotion he was trying to hide. They had dealt with a horrible year, but the year had also given them some amazing gifts. Today was a day in which they could be grateful for all the good they experienced. She leaned up and gave him a deeper kiss as they continued to hold tight to each other. He gently explored her mouth with his tongue and would occasionally nip at her bottom lip. Eventually she pulled back, needing some air, but kept eye contact with him.

"Get your holiday pants on, babe. Let's get some coffee before Noah realizes Santa visited," she said and made her way to the door. She heard Ed give a heart chuckle behind her.

"I can't wait."

* * *

Two hours later found the family of four sitting around the tree, surrounded by strips of torn up wrapping paper, and nibbling on a breakfast casserole Ed had thrown together. Olivia wanted to do Santa presents first, then they could exchange the rest later after the craziness had worn off a bit. As expected, Noah had been completely wired once he saw his brand new scooter. Olivia had opted to set it up, unwrapped, by the tree. Charlie insisted on adding a bow, but it was the first thing the little tot saw when he finally entered the living room clad in his reindeer footie pajamas.

"I ride scooter now?" He asked from Charlie's lap. They were busy working on a Cars puzzle he received, after he reluctantly got off his scooter to open more presents.

"Not yet, baby." Olivia said softly from the sofa. "Maybe this afternoon if the weather allows."

It had been a nice morning so far. Noah was over enthusiastic about each gift Santa had brought him, and he even got excited when he saw there was a present for his mom, Ed, and Charlie from Santa.

"What Santa bring you, Tar-lie?" Noah asked excitedly as he watched her unwrap her present. Inside was a custom Yankees jersey with C. Tucker on the back, to match the one Ed opened earlier with E. Tucker.

"Wow, I love it!" She exclaimed happily and turned it around for Noah to see.

"You match Daddy now!"

Olivia was already checking her calendar to see when she could schedule her full-on spa day that Santa had gifted her. She had teased Ed that since he wasn't working anymore, child care wasn't an issue. He just grinned, knowing she deserved a day of pampering, while he took Noah around to cause some trouble.

"Does anyone want a coffee refill?" Charlie asked as she deposited Noah into Ed's lap and stood to stretch her legs.

"We may need another pot," Ed murmured as he helped Noah select the next puzzle piece.

"I'm on it," she replied and headed towards the kitchen. Olivia watched her go in, then turned her attention to the boys.

"It is almost noon," she acknowledged. "Should we start on the other gifts, so we can freshen up before Rollins and Finn arrive?"

They weren't looking to have a big, noisy holiday, but Olivia was well aware that Finn and Amanda didn't have other family nearby, so she figured they could do a pot-luck dinner at her apartment. Noah and Jessie would enjoy playing together, and the adults could just relax. She was also hoping that Charlie would continue to connect with Amanda, as she needed some strong female role models in her life these days.

"Sounds good, babe," Tucker said from the floor, and began to encourage Noah to clean up a bit so they could open more presents. Charlie came in after putting the fresh pot of coffee on and sat on the couch by Olivia. Ed reached under the tree and produced the first package. He had to put his reading glasses on to read the tag.

"Hurry up, old man," Charlie teased which earned her a fake glare from Ed. Noah just giggled, as if he really understood what was happening.

"To Noah, from Charlie," he said finally and handed the tot his present. Noah immediately tore into it and was slack jawed at what he saw. Inside was an authentic and fully stocked Peter Pan costume that was custom made for Noah. Charlie had searched everywhere for something like it and only came across cheap looking outfits. Finally, through a connection at work, she found someone who could make one for her. It included real shoes, so he could wear it outside if he wanted and some accessories in case he needed to lead the Lost Boys.

"I BE PAN?!" he shrieked as he began to pull the outfit out of the box. Olivia had a look of shock, as well, as she turned to look at Charlie with a questioning glance.

"Where did you find that?" she asked, knowing she also had looked everywhere.

"Let's just say I have friends in high places," she responded with a smirk. "Totally worth the effort to see that look on his face."

They continued to open presents from each other, which included a framed photo of the four of them for Olivia's desk along with a gorgeous cashmere sweater, hockey tickets for Ed, a t-ball set for Noah, pearl earrings for Charlie, and much more. They were down to just two boxes under the tree, which Ed had purposely saved for last.

"These are the last two," he said softly as he handed Olivia and Charlie each a box. "I don't want to get overly emotional about it, but I wanted you two to have something special this Christmas. It's been a rough year for all of us, but the fact that we are together means everything to me. And we are together because of how strong the two of you are. Both of you have been through hell and have come out on the other side even more incredible than you were before. So Noah and I got you these to remind you of that strength. You two are the most incredible women in the world. And we love you so much."

As he finished up, Olivia was already teary but Charlie just sat there holding the unopened box in shaking hands. Liv looked over to her and quickly kissed the side of her head.

"Let's open at the same time?" She suggested and Charlie just nodded. As they slowly open the gift, they box let out a gasp about the same time. Inside each purple jewelry box was a gold necklace with the word "Fearlessness" written in script. Charlie softly fingered the words as Olivia looked up at Ed with tears in her eyes.

"You're my fearless girls," he said simply. "And I never want you to forget it."

* * *

Later that evening, Noah was entertaining the small crowd in his new Peter Pan costume. He continually demanded that people "walk the plank", but would then change his mind and say "No, you not walk plank. You good." Ed was happily holding a sleeping Jessie against his chest while he and Finn talked sports, and Olivia kept stealing glances at the sight of her fiance cradling a baby. Charlie and Amanda seemed to be deep in conversation about the latest episode of some show, while sipping on egg nog. For the most part, the day had been perfect. Noah had put up a small fuss when he was told he needed to take a nap, but once Charlie agreed to join him, he went right in and fell asleep. Once the guests had arrived, however, Olivia noticed Charlie's mood shift. That morning she was her usual happy and sarcastic self, but as the evening progressed she seemed more somber. Even her talk with Amanda didn't seem as animated as it usually was.

"Do you guys need a refill?" She asked as she came over to the dining room table to join them.

"No, I'm okay. Thanks Liv." Charlie replied giving her a soft smile.

"Yeah, I need to get going with Jessie before she ruins Ed's sweater with her drool." Amanda stated and went to put her glass in the sink.

"He looks pretty content, though," Charlie observed as she watched her father cradle the sleeping girl.

"Yeah, babies look good on him. Shockingly." Amanda said as Olivia and Charlie laughed a bit, understanding the change in perception of Ed Tucker.

"He's just a big ole softy, now. Thanks to Olivia." Charlie said with a little smile and nudged Liv's shoulder. Amanda gathered her stuff and went to grab Jessie from Ed, who just stood up.

"I'll help you get into a cab," he offered as Finn also grabbed his jacket.

"Yeah, I will too….then I might bum a ride in that cab." Finn said slyly as he went to kiss Olivia's cheek and give Charlie a quick hug.

"Merry Christmas, everyone." He said as he grabbed a bag from Amanda and they made their way out the door. Once it shut behind them, a disappointed Noah came over to climb into Olivia's lap.

"Chriss-mas over?" He asked sadly, not wanting the festivities to end.

"Well, this day is almost over. But tomorrow all of your presents will still be here for you to play with. And maybe we'll go to the park and ride your scooter if the snow holds off." Olivia offered, hoping to cheer him up a bit. It worked.

"Otay!" he said and leapt off her lap to continue his imaginative Peter Pan story in the living room. Olivia turned her attention to Charlie, who seemed to be staring at her phone with a far-off look.

"Charlie, you okay?" She asked softly, and went to touch the girl's arm. Charlie startled a bit and looked up at her, and Olivia could see the moisture in her eyes.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just need a minute," she said quickly, with a trembling lip, and scurried off to the bathroom. Olivia watched her go, debating whether to follow or give her space. She opted for the later, hoping it wasn't anything big. Noah quickly distracted her by demanding she play Wendy until Ed got back from downstairs. Life was never dull with a three year old, but she hoped her fiancé returned soon so she could check on Charlie.

* * *

Ed had returned and after speaking with Olivia, he eventually found Charlie back in the master bedroom, sitting on the edge of the bed with tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Charlie, what's wrong?" He asked, alarmed, as he came to sit next to her. She just shrugged and wiped her tears with the sleeve of her sweater. She had changed into lounge attire, so was clad in leggings, a tank top, and an oversized cardigan. As Ed went to put a hand on her back, another sob escaped her and her whole body shook a bit. "Oh, baby girl…."

Charlie shrugged him off when he went to pull her into a hug. Trying not to show his hurt, Ed just continued to keep his distance but offer some support.

"Was today too much for you?" He asked, feeling like that was the only explanation for why she was this upset after such a nice holiday. Charlie just shook her head and tried to take some deep breaths.

"No, today was amazing," she said softly, but the sadness was still evident. "I'm just being stupid."

"Charlie, anything that upsets you this much isn't stupid," Ed said, hoping to get her to talk to him. But he came up empty.

"I don't want to talk about it," she said softly, but looked up at him with a teary smile. "I just need a minute to pull myself together."

Ed kissed her forehead and stood up, honoring her request.

"Yell if you change your mind." he said as he walked back out into the living room, leaving the door open a crack. Olivia was waiting for him on the couch with Noah, as they watched his coveted Peter Pan before he went to sleep.

"She okay?" She asked softly, as to not alert Noah to a potentially sad Charlie.

"No," Ed said and sat down next to her with a defeated look. "She's not okay, but she doesn't want to talk to me about it."

"Any idea as to what it is?"

"I have no idea. She seemed genuinely happy most of the day. Never gave a sign that she was uncomfortable or overwhelmed. But maybe it was too much?"

"It's possible," Olivia said as she thought about it. "She may not be used to having a happy family Christmas. Though, I'm not too sure any of us are. This was a first for all of us."

"True…"

"I'm going to go see if she'll talk to me," Liv said, standing up and running her fingers through Noah's hair. He didn't budge, so she made her way back to her bedroom. As she slipped in, closing the door behind her, she saw Charlie in full-on tears with her head down. Olivia quickly made her way over to her, sat down, and pulled her in for a hug.

"Baby, what's wrong?" She asked softly as she held the girl's head to her, tucked under her chin. Charlie just continued to sob, but she gripped Olivia's arm, so she figured it was okay to keep talking to her. "I know today may have been overwhelming, but it's okay. It's okay to be confused about it all."

"That isn't it…" Charlie finally said as she sat up and grabbed a tissue to try and clean up her face. "That isn't it at all."

"So what is it?" Olivia asked, confused as to what was going through her head. Charlie just sat there for a little bit, before taking a deep breath and talking.

"My mom…." she started, and had to hold in another sob. "I sent her a Merry Christmas text. She didn't text me back."

Olivia's face fell as the girl dissolved into tears again. How could that woman not acknowledge her own daughter? It was infuriating. Olivia had half a mind to call her and let her know exactly what she felt about it, but thought that would hurt more than help. So instead, she just pulled Charlie to her again and rocked her gently back and forth as she cried.

"It's like, I always knew that she didn't care. But there was a piece of me that just hoped I was wrong. That maybe, one day, she'd realize she actually did love me. But she won't. My own mother doesn't care about me enough to send a simple text message on Christmas."

"Oh sweetheart," Olivia whispered, trying to hold in her own tears.

"I should've known better than to reach out today. It was stupid. I got my hopes up. But I just thought we were having such a nice day here. And I wanted to tell her Merry Christmas. But she just ignored me, as usual."

Olivia continued to hang on to Charlie, hoping to convey her own love and affection for her in an attempt to help. But she knew there was nothing worse than feeling like your own mother hated you.

"Your mom is making a huge mistake, Charlie." Olivia began, with a quick prayer that her words would be helpful and not make it worse. "When she let you walk out of her life, that is the biggest mistake she ever made. And maybe she doesn't realize it now, but one day she will. She will know what she missed. I know that doesn't take away the pain now, sweetheart. But I just want you to know how much your dad and I love you. And how grateful we are that you are here, with us, on this day and every other day."

Charlie finally looked up at Olivia, with the tears still streaming. Olivia reached out to hold her cheeks in her hands as she spoke to her.

"Charlie, we will always be here for you. And we will always love you. And I will never stop being grateful for the opportunity to be a mother to you and to Noah."

Charlie moved her hands to hold onto Olivia's arms and gave her a soft smile.

"I'll never stop being grateful for you either, Olivia. This whole thing with my mom today just made me realize how lucky I am to have you in my life. I love you." Olivia smiled warmly as Charlie spoke to her. She stood, pulling Charlie up with her, and gave her another big hug.

"I love you too, Charlie."

* * *

 ** _Up Next: The final chapter of this adventure._**

 ** _Leave a review and let me know your thoughts. And, if you are up for a sequel ;)_**


	38. Chapter 38

_**Well, we've come to the end of this story and I am surprisingly emotional about letting it wrap up. I just wanted to take a minute to express how appreciative I am of all of your comments and support. I wrote this story based off of my own experience in college. And while Charlie had a happier ending than most (myself included), I still felt like it was an important story to tell. I am still in awe of how well this was received. I do hope you all will take a minute to realize that the reactions and emotions I wrote in this FanFic are real. Always believe victims and survivors.**_

 _ **Thank you thank you thank you for embarking upon this journey with me, and I hope you will join me for the sequel.**_

* * *

It was New Years Eve and Ed, Olivia, Charlie, and Noah were sitting on the floor surrounded by boxes, eating leftover Chinese food. The day after Christmas, Ed and Olivia signed a lease on the three bedroom apartment in their current building. Once that was done, they pretty easily convinced Charlie to move with them temporarily. She hadn't saved anything from her old apartment, so she decided it would make sense to stay with them until she could re-furnish Olivia's apartment and move in comfortably. Noah was elated that Charlie was coming with them, and he wasn't quite understanding that it was just temporary.

"You move with us, Tar-lie. It be good." He said, in his usual commanding way. Charlie just leaned over to poke his nose.

"It will be good, pal," Charlie said. "And I promise you that when I move out, you will have a standing sleepover invitation with me."

"Yea!" He said and did a little fist pump into the air, causing Ed and Olivia to chuckle as they polished off their sesame chicken.

"You love your Charlie, don't you sweet boy?" Olivia asked, loving to watch the two kids together. Noah just nodded enthusiastically and went to plop in Charlie's lap.

"I lub Tar-lie. She my sister now." Noah said and he leaned back into her for a cuddle. Charlie squeezed him tight and shook him a bit, causing him to giggle.

"I love my Noah too! You're my best pal." Noah just smiled happily at her and patted her cheek. Ed cleared his throat a little, and they turned to look at him.

"I thought maybe now would be a good time to give you two some good news," he said in his usual, gruff Tucker tone.

"News?" Noah asked, unsure what that statement even meant. Ed smiled softly at him and took Olivia's hand.

"We set a date for our wedding," he said and looked at Olivia with a grin. Her eyes shown with excitement as he spoke to the kids about their plans. "We've booked a wedding chapel in Hawaii for mid-March. All four of us will go for the week, if that's okay."

"Wow, Hawaii?" Charlie exclaimed. "Oh my gosh, I'm so excited!"

Noah had no clue what Hawaii was, but seeing Charlie get so excited he happily joined in the celebration.

"Noah go to Hi-Ee too!"

"I'm going to learn to surf!" Charlie exclaimed, clearly beyond pumped about this decision. Ed just laughed at her enthusiasm and nodded; she could get whatever she wanted out of this deal.

"There's just one catch," he said, trying to slow her planning. "We will get married on the third night we are there, and plan to take a mini-honeymoon on the island. So we will need you to hang out with Noah."

"Moon?" Noah asked, not entirely sure what was being talked about. Olivia tried to explain.

"After a couple gets married, they go on a honeymoon so they can celebrate. We won't be gone long, though. And you'll have fun with Charlie."

"You go to moon without Noah?" He asked, astonished that they would do such a thing. Charlie cracked up while Olivia tried to explain that they weren't actually going to the moon. Once the tyke was satisfied that no one was going to space and leaving him behind, he turned his attention back to his dinner.

"Charlie, are you sure you are okay with this plan?" Olivia asked. "We will do some stuff all together before the ceremony, so you will have a bit of freedom from him."

"Of course!" she exclaimed, putting her almost step-mother's fears at ease. "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii and hanging out with Noah will be a blast. Plus, I'm ready for you to marry my dad."

"I'm ready for her to marry your dad, too." Ed said slyly and leaned over to give Olivia a quick kiss. "More than ready."

* * *

As Olivia was getting Noah down for the night, Ed took the opportunity to sit next to Charlie on the sofa and try to catch up on what all had happened that day. She had gone to meet with Trevor Langan earlier, and despite multiple offers for company, she insisted she wanted to go on her own. He reluctantly backed off, with some coaxing from Olivia, but he had been on edge most of the day waiting for a chance to talk to her.

"How did it go earlier with Trevor?" He asked, waisting no time getting down to business. Charlie kept her eyes locked on the hot wheels car she was turning over in her hands as she began to answer.

"Good, I guess," she began. "He seems to think I have a pretty solid case. Was very confident. I would have to give a statement on record, so there's that."

"Do you think you'd be up for it?" Ed asked cautiously, wanting to offer some support but also not wanting to upset her.

"I don't know," she replied honestly. "A year ago, hell even a few months ago, I would say no. I wouldn't be able to handle it. But now? I don't know. It's hard to say. I know I'm not alone. I'd have you and Olivia and Trevor behind me. And that goes a long way."

"Charlie, you have an army of people behind you now. Of course Olivia and I are right there with you. Langan. Barba. Amanda. Finn. Carisi. Your boss has been incredibly understanding throughout this. You have so much support behind you, sweetheart."

"Yeah," she said softly, still playing with the car almost out of nervous habit. "It's just, that whole system has destroyed my life. And I want them to know that, ya know? I want them to feel bad about it. And I want them to suffer, just a little bit."

"If I had my way, I'd crucify that school and police department," Tucker said with a low, angry voice. "Everything that they did was just wrong."

"Did you know this happens other places, too?" Charlie asked and finally looked up at her father. "Trevor showed me cases from other colleges. It's just infuriating. How can they turn their backs on us like that?"

"When power and money is involved, it makes people do terrible things," Ed admitted softly. "But you can take some of that power back now, if you want."

"I think I want to do it," Charlie said and reached for Ed's hand. "I'll text Trevor and let him know to proceed, but he said it could take a couple of years to get everything settled."

"Yeah, sometimes these things take time," Ed said and pulled her in for a hug. "I'm proud of you, Charlie. So incredibly proud of you."

Charlie wrapped her arms around her dad and closed her eyes as she rested against his chest.

"I wasn't able to fight back before, but now I can. And that's because of you."

* * *

"I'm too tired to do anything but lay here," Ed groaned after he and Olivia finally collapsed into bed around 2am. The entire apartment was packed and ready for movers to arrive about 8am. Noah, still not convinced Charlie was coming with them, was happily curled up in bed with her and they were both out cold. Now Olivia was chuckling at Ed's whining, and decided to tease him a bit.

"What happened to ringing in the new year with sex?" She asked in a joking manner, knowing she wasn't up to it either. But he had made such a big deal about their first encounter of the new year, that she couldn't leave it alone. But all she heard in response was a grunt.

"Yeah, well, I'm not as young as I used to be," he grumbled, but managed to pull Olivia into his chest and kiss her head. "Despite our lack of New Year's sex, you know I love you right?"

Olivia propped her chin on his chest and looked into his eyes.

"Of course I know that. You show me each and every day," she said softly and kissed his chin. "I love you too."

"We've been through a lot together, even before this year," he said, still gazing at his soon to be wife.

"Mhm," she agreed.

"Do you still resent me for the past?" This was a subject they had spoken about at length in the beginning of their relationship, but it still worried him a good bit that she harbored some negative feelings about how he treated her unit in the past.

"Ed, we've been over this," she said confidently. "You were just doing your job, and I was just doing mine. No one could have predicted that we would fall so in love with each other, but it just goes to show you how much people can change and grow as life goes on. I love that about our story."

"Life hasn't been easy for either of us, has it?" He said, as he ran his fingers through her hair.

"No, it hasn't," Olivia admitted, still with her chin propped on his chest so she could see his face through the city light shining in the window. "And we will still have challenges. But I wouldn't want to face tomorrow with anyone but you."

"And you'll never have to," he assured her before pulling her up for a kiss. He pulled away and rested his forehead against hers, while stroking her cheek. "It may have taken more time and work than most families, but here we are. We've come together."

* * *

 _ **The End**_


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